Basic cleaning tips to make life easier with children and ADHD

[LostMyTrainOfThought]

Please give me your basic cleaning tips to make my life easier!

Im a single mum to girls aged 15 & 10 and I've never been the best at cleaning but I've had a couple light bulb moments and realised I make everyday tasks 100x more difficult.

Example one my vacuum kept getting blocked instead of purchasing a new one I aimlessly tried to clear the blockage and pushed it around with 50% less suction then used broom/dust pan and brush for the hard floor! I purchased a cordless vacuum cleaner which is already helping because its portable

Example two (please don't laugh or mock) cleaning the bathroom I realised moving the cat litter trays/undersink cabinet, towel storage and junk thats piled up in the corner then sweeping/ hoovering and mopping instead of sweeping and mopping around things is hygienic and easier to maintain.

I grew up in a clean house with my mum and sisters however she never worked so presumably most of the cleaning was done whilst we were at school because I don't remember being taught to clean and very recently I was diagnosed (and medicated) for ADHD.

Please take it back to basics for me.. im trying to teach my daughters but at the moment its inconsistent and chaotic.

I have a chaotic brain and realised far later than I should have that I make my own life ridiculously difficult. To maintain order and semblance of cleanliness, my top tips would be:

• Get rid of every bit of clutter you possibly can
• Keep the house as tidy as possible. Cleaning is easier when you aren't moving crap to clean.
• Do not fall down rabbit holes. If the kitchen surfaces need to be wiped, wipe them. Do not put something back in the cupboard then decide to tidy the cupboard. One task at a time and finish it.
• Do not overestimate what you can do in the time available, you won't do it so will either give up or be cross with yourself. Give yourself 3 things to do, eg, hoover downstairs, dust the living room, put out the recycling. Do those things and only those. Then, if you have time, and only then, do something else. Otherwise you end up with 18 half done jobs.

ADHD over here and my house is a bit chaotic which was making cleaning harder I’ve been sorting out a cupboard at a time clearing out anything I don’t need. Actually having a home to put everything and keeping surfaces clutter free has helped

The frustrating thing is I know that I should focus on one task at a time but because the task im doing is usually boring I fall down that rabbit hole but I think this could be incorporated into tip four.

Clutter is my nemesis but im making headway with this admittedly everything goes in the bin because the reality is it will never be sorted to be taken to a charity shop or sold on Vinted. Then I run out of space and end up with bin bags of clutter but this is something im already working on so at least im going in the right direction.

Choosing three tasks is actually a really good tip and something I utilise at work.

Mine is "just do a little bit everyday"
Washing 3 dishes takes 2 minutes. Washing 30 dishes takes 200 years. When I was freshly post partum I knew that not doing the very small things on a daily basis left me with bigger and bigger things to do as the days went on. It seems obvious to some but it took me years to understand it.
Do the little things and do them often. Micro tasking

I am a complete clutter brained person (I'm not diagnosed with anything but suspect I have ADHD) so my house is also very easily cluttered by default. I do like purge cleaning though every few months and top tip is inviting people around. Even (or especially) a playdate as the pressure not to be judged by another mum is so great that suddenly my house becomes pretty damn clear and clean! To get ready for someone to come round, I usually do blitz cleaning and decluttering a week or so beforehand. And no I don't allow people just to "drop in" or "pop by", although I don't have many people to do this with anyway 😒

My added complication is I find all the cleaning social media overwhelming too. People swear by Dana K White but for me that is just too much content to consume.

One good tip for decluttering is the decluttering game. The original is you spend a month decluttering one thing on day 1, 2 things on day 2 etc up to 30 things on day 30. Altogether that takes over 400 things out of your house. It can be anything, down to a handful of receipts from your bag, I. find it suits my brain better to run it in reverse, breaking the back of it in the first few days while I have the most momentum.

The genius is that instead of having to tidy a whole drawer, you can just go in for the easy wins at first. It is much easier to reach in and pick stuff out until you have 15 items than making decisions about every single thing in the drawer.

I kept track for a month and also had days when I went over target, and ended up with 1000 items got rid of.

I hate purge cleaning it stresses me out so much because Im only brushing the surface. I want to find hacks or mindsets that can help me consistently clean Eg if someone comes round (not unexpectedly!) I will focus on the rooms they will be in but I see family/friends/neighbours who can just keep everything clean to a decent standard. It makes me feel a failure because I will never clean my windows, im constantly washing up/hoovering or cleaning the kitchen but I never seem to clean the skirting boards or dusting the high ceilings in the hallways!

I used to challenge myself to see how many dishes I can wash up while an AD break was on! This rarely works now because I watch disney/netflix. I also have a terrible habit of closing the door to the room I dont want to deal with

I make a list of 10 things that need to be done, quick jobs is best, and assign each one a number. For example 1 could be hoover stairs, 2 is load dishwasher etc. Then when I have some time I ask my phone to generate a random number between 1 and 10 and do whatever task is associated with that number. A bit of fun and takes away the decision fatigue that comes with my ADHD.

Watching for tips.

Something I find helps is setting reminders in my calendar eg hoover porch and stairs weekly, clear x cupboard every 3 months.

I totally get the overwhelm - i start in the kitchen and realise I should wipe sides, wipe down cupboare fronts, sweep... but sticking to three things is tough and often I just panic and abandon all!

I have poor executive function and a few things that have helped me;

habits/habit stacking: eg when i make my morning coffee I empty the dishwasher / draining board and I hang out the washing. Before I get dressed I make the bed.

everything has a home. I spend less time frantically searching for car keys as they live on a hook. This helps me feel less chaotic.

I struggle to tidy as I go along so give myself five minutes to do it at the end. I also set 5-10 minute timers and tidy - its amazing what you can get done.

I have a basket on the stair for upstairs things and a basket in the landing for downstairs. This helps me stay focused - eg if when tidying I were to take things upstairs ill start task jumping and nothing get finished

I tend to do a bit of a cook once eat twice (maybe 3!) and this means less tidying up! Think making double and freezing portions. Means I can fell like I have a couple of days of cooking which is great.

I think this is a fundamentally different question to what you were asking in your OP though. Teaching your daughter's does start with the surface weekly stuff. Ultimately you only get to things like windows but spending more time than you currently do on cleaning, or dropping something you are already doing to prioritise these more "background" tasks. All the systems in the world are just ways to try to trick yourself into spending more time cleaning. One way to help is to just accept it is going to take you more hours than you usually spend cleaning.

Make yourself a list of all the things you are not getting done and dedicate a chunk of time when you will work only on those tasks, eg Tuesday evenings. Give the project a name - Team Mysurname's Grand Scrubification.and get the kids to help. Cross the tasks off as you go.

Also I find doing laundry on only 1-2 days a week helps me squish it into a smaller box. I have 5ish laundry-free days which gives me a fighting chance.

Strategies I have "magpied" from cleaning influencers - the 10 min tidy and the weekly home blessing hour from Fly lady. Doing these 2 things would reduce your "overhead" of the weekly basics which might free up more time for you to tackle the other stuff.

I like @Spartan's idea a lot. One way to manage the 3 things thing is to write them all on post it's, on the side of fridge or inside a cupboard door or something. Pick 3 at a time to move to fridge door, do those, bin them, pick another 3 etc.

Declutter and stick to a routine. So every Monday, your job is to do X, on Tuesday you do Y etc. I also have a daily routine so every night before bed I do wash all the dishes, clean the toilets and empty the litter trays. In the mornings I vacuum, mop the floors and wash all the breakfast stuff.

I struggle with decluttering - any tips for that? Like I think with clothes - I might wear it some day or with children’s things I have memory attached to them. Or bedding - ill use it some day. That kind of thing.

Move things to a special space for things that you might need / can’t quite part with yet - I have an old laundry basket - and every few years empty it

ok something usually stays but it seems to help

i should move the towel with holes into there shouldn’t I ?

For me (possibly spectral) it helps to keep things near where I use them so I don’t have to for example leave a room which will distract me. So cleaning products/caddies in all bathrooms and near the sink. Laundry baskets in every bedroom and in the main bathroom, because that’s were changing happens. (If I had small kids and they got dressed/undressed in the living room I’d keep a laundry basket there.) Anything to make it more likely that I’ll put stuff away/deal with it. Better to work with my weaknesses than struggle to change, it’s too draining.

I think there’s a lot to be said for making it easy for yourself. So as pp have said above, keep the clutter down and it’s easier to clean. One of my “things” is not to let the bins become overfull. It’s a lot easier to empty a half full bin bag, than an over flowing one. Similarly, I try and empty the dishwasher first thing in the morning so that I can fill it throughout the day. For bathroom cleaning, I’m a big fan of anti-bacterial floor wipes which are big enough to do all the surfaces in one go so i do it every few days instead of once a week.

Basically - I’m lazy but efficient.

Sounds easy enough to say but, as someone who strongly suspects I have ADHD, I can spend all day designing routines but simply cannot stick to them. I was the classic 'spend the first day of revision season designing a revision timetable, instantly get behind on day 1, spend the next day redoing the timetable etc etc etc' and that has been the way I am for decades.

Probably the only time I willingly did any cleaning was when I was supposed to be revising for my finals (I went as a mature student so had my own house by then).

The only tip I can give to help with the boredom is to listen to podcasts while you do it. I can manage that for a bit.

You mention never getting round to cleaning the skirting or windows. Could you get a professional in to do a deep clean of those every so often? That's something else I'm looking at - I'm thinking dealing with a regular cleaner might be too difficult but perhaps that could be manageable and then allow you to concentrate on day to day vaccumming.

For cobwebs, I'm going to buy one of these after seeing it mentioned on here:

Lakeland Ultra Reach Cobweb Duster

A laundry basket for every bedroom/bathroom. Every day a basket of dirty washing comes down, every day a basket of clean dry stuff goes up.

a smaller basket for every person. Goes on the stairs. Every bit of clutter goes in it, you come home, they take it up, empty it into their room and return it in the morning.

This works for me too. If I do what needs doing, I either find a never ending list of stuff to do or get so overwhelmed by possibilities that I can’t face it. Mondays is clean downstairs.

if I miss a turn, I don’t try and make it up in the same week unless we have visitors due. Then it becomes a miserable box ticking exercise

I clean one bedroom a week on rotation. A dust,wipe and roomba.

oh yes roomba! Doesn’t get in corners but it’s a small price to pay. I also enjoy getting all the head hair off the rollers because I’m weird like that. You can get ones that mop too.

if you can’t hide stuff away then clear containers make it less overwhelming.

hate to admit it but the main one is just reduce inventory. Easier said than done!

In France every home has one of these. I brought one back the last time I went home but DS nabbed it for his house.
I will order one from Lakeland now, thank you. ❤️

Great thread. I am Dyspraxic also with ADHD. I used to do Flylady when the DC were younger and I managed to stick to it.
Tomorrow I am off work so I will clean the house, I can't do it with anyone else in it.
I am dreading it because it desperately needs doing but I know I will feel better once it's done.
We are having a huge declutter of our garage next week. I hired a skip firm who don't actually bring skips, you just calculate how much crap you need taking in terms of how much would fit in whichever size skip and they clear it in less than an hour. It's amazing to me. 😁
I can't wait to have a clear garage again and then I can declutter the house (and do it all again!) We are eventually moving back to France so it needs doing.

From watching friends and family who always seem to have tidy homes, a few habits really stand out:
-Tiding up as instead of waiting for everything to pile up.
-Clearingl surfaces before cleaning, which makes the job much quicker.
-Keeping a small bin in every room so rubbish doesn't build up.
-Putting things back where they belong straight away.
-Don't try to clean the whole house in one go, instead focus on one room or one task at a time.
-Getting everyone in the house involved, even with small jobs, so one person isn't doing everything.
It doesn't seem to be about cleaning for hours; it's more about having a few simple habits that stop the mess from getting out of hand.

I use the free Tody app. Room by room you can make a list of what needs doing, how often it needs doing etc. Then it sends you a reminder. So I'll get a notification today for example that the downstairs loo needs cleaning. I do that and tick it off. Very satisfying if you're a list maker.