What is it like to live in Scandinavia?

[Glitterbiscuits]

DH and I are having a debate.

He says Scandinavian countries are the most developed socially, economically and in regard to the environment, equality, etc. He assumes there is not much poverty or homelessness in Scandinavian countries. He thinks the high taxes leads to good public services such as transport.

Is his positive view justified?

Mm. I’m not sure.

Is it cruel to expect a person to whom a country grants asylum and whose citizens pay for the food that goes in his mouth and the roof that goes over his head to abide by the laws and respect the customs of the country that has taken him in? Is it cruel to expect a degree of integration and gratitude and reimbursement where possible of the expense? I don’t think it is.

In Denmark you’re certainly expected as any kind of resident foreigner to respect Denmark, learn the language and conform to social norms. It’s a very happy cohesive society - They want to keep it that way.

Regarding the comment about organised crime in sweden: It is a definite concern. From the old-school MC gangs, to the immigrant gangs, it is a big issue. No-one living in sweden can be unaware of it.

The city i live in is effectively segregated. Native swedes say this too.

However, if you live a nice part (not the ghetto), it is lovely to live here. The nature is amazing. It still blows my mind that I can iceskate on my favourite lake during the winter, then swim in it in summer.

Also in our little suburb, there is a thriving drinking culture. We have a local pub (or two...).

Yeah, I wasn’t really saying it out of judgement at all. But sometimes there’s a tendency to view the countries in Scandinavia as clean and peaceful havens where everything is wonderful when that’s not really true. But organised crime all over Europe is a massive issue, particularly as groups and networks become more spread out and operate across borders.

Well and of that publication France was marked as the least safe, and the UK was only one rank above Sweden. It also accounts for increased military spending as a negative factor because it implies militarisation. Given the Russian situation and that Sweden has recently joined NATO I would imagine that's impacting it substantially.

https://www.economicsandpeace.org/wp-content/uploads/2026/06/Global-Peace-Index-2026-Report.pdf

(Page 26)

For societal safety and security Sweden comes twelfth in the world (page 113).

We relocated to Scandinavia at Christmas.
We are much happier than in UK. I suppose the Scandinavian countries aren't the same 1:1.

My middle aged friends in Finland seem to have calm, ordered lives. Lots of time spent outside, lovely food, manageable working hours etc. However youth unemployment is very high. Many talented educated young people feel they can't start their adult lives.
And of course a faint permanent shadow of having Russia as a neighbour with a long history between them and an ongoing concern about Putin's intentions.

@Flatinbed what is an MC gang please?

I need to improve my gang knowledge lol

Sorry to the poster who has Covid yeah Western Europe makes sense

Well it’s barely dark at all at this time of year depending where they are, but I can’t speak for the other two points.

I linked to an article about asset stripping refugees fleeing in desperation of the few things they could carry, some of which presumably have memories and are important for a sense of self. You do you, I can see we start from different points, and Ihave no more to add.

Scotland and Denmark are on a parallel geographically and the long light of summer followed by hygge of winter is one of the things I love about both.

It will also help if you are white or white passing, otherwise you could be exactly the same in your behaviour -- but still be treated more coldly if you look 'wrong'. It can feel 'Aryan'.

Finland is reckoning better with aspects of its indigenous Sami identity than it used to. Wild and wonderful.

I had reason to be in Inverness one mid-summer for work and was quite discombobulated at sitting in the hotel bar after dinner and cars still going past outside without needing their lights on. Must have been well gone 10pm.

I guess we do start from different viewpoints. I feel enormous compassion for some asylum seekers but not male economic migrants who come from and share cultures and beliefs encompassing medieval attitudes to women as akin to livestock.

I can only guess at how I’d feel as an asylum seeker about my new home. In my case I’d think I would feel bad about having to accept charity and profound lifelong gratitude to the sanctuary and its people. I would be desperate to fit in and give back to whatever extent I could. My Romanian friend certainly has this attitude .

Most likely, yes. Would say same for UK /most of western world.

She's from Falkenberg. I've not been there so can't confirm but she says she was pretty miserable there.

I grew up in the suburbs of one of the Scandinavian capital cities mentioned and, @RedToothBrush , there is absolutely a huge problem with gangs and drugs. Think Rotherham.
In my country, there is poverty, especially among the elderly. The model of 'Folkhemmet' where the citizen is supported from cradle to grave by a caring government is outdated -many older people find their income is not enough to cover the basics, including medical care (access to medical care is not free at the point of use).
There is also not as much 'choice' and citizen autonomy. 'Skolplikt' dictates that all children attend school, with much less flexibility for families who would have liked to home educate, or parents of children who struggle to attend school. Ver few are stay at home parents -the strong cultural expectation is that both parents work full time (two full time incomes are necessary for affording a basic standard of living).
Unless you have grown up with the very strong cultural expectations around social conformity and adherence to strict behavioural norms, it is hard to convey just how pervasive they can be and how the perceived consequences of isolation and blame can feel quite overwhelming. I am a dyed in the wool social democrat, who absolutely believes in strong taxation and a strong central government setting the tone for civic life, but after 30+ decades in the UK, I now find my home country stifling, restrictive and socially regressive. Your DH is doing what many do, seeing only what they want to be true.

Motorcycle gangs

I lived in Sweden for a year - I would hate to life there any longer. It didn’t suit who I am. The people are very strait laced - they lack spontaneity, so serious, aren’t keen on foreigners despite their apparent liberal credentials. It’s uptight and probably a bit smug - I was so happy to leave.

You can definitely homeschool in some Scandinavian countries. I think Sweden is quite tough on the subject though.

I mean, allowing asylum seekers to work would be a start...

Some men flee the cultures you mention because they don't approve of them and are not safe in them, either. They arrive ahead of women because they want to establish it is ok for the women and children. The UK is also not considered safe for or respectful of brown women, though in a different, less violent and state-entrenched way.

But the stripping of personal mementos and fallback possessions from refugees is so dehumanising. Imagine if we had done that to WWII refugees. A society that dehumanises people fleeing war is going to eat itself one day.

I've lived in Sweden for 20 years and I love it. I live the calmness and the space. Also the support I get as an autistic adult is outstanding, as is the support available for my autistic son if we needed it.

I think a lot of countries in the west are more pluralistic and historically various at everyday-life level, even if not in state policy and even though not perfect or aiming for perfection. Especially the ones that have had ancient or modern empires. Uniformity and conformity are not the same as unity and do not give much space for the joys of difference and encounter.

Scandinavia can't provide jobs for all asylum seekers with questionable educational backgrounds and language skills. It is already difficult for those who get a residence permit. Probably the same in the UK.

Preventing people from working then blaming them for taking from the state is not sensible. Why can't they compete for jobs like anyone else? Let employers decide.

I do wonder why migrants' language skills are not being actively tapped to help the UK become less monoglot. It would help us enormously. Even at the level of neurological development, not to say global business.

I am not blaming anyone but good luck to any nation not having restrictions.