Reasonable garden and music cut-off times for an 18th birthday party?

[Wigeon]

DD is having her 18th birthday party at home, jointly with a friend. They have invited 35 guests, I am guessing (hoping!) not everyone will come. We have a smallish garden so it's fairly close to our neighbours houses, both side neighbours and those at the end of the garden. We are semi-detached. The party is on a weeknight (and not a Friday).

Given it's the day after everyone finishes their A Levels, I think they will be a bit giddy and over excited.

What time would you tell them they have to come in from the garden? What time would you tell them the music inside needs to be turned right down? DD inevitably wants this as late as possible and obviously we want to be respectful of the neighbours. Although we barely ever have a noisy party, so this is a very rare occurrence.

I think midnight is acceptable as a one off.

Party near me last night till 1ish but every other night it's silent at night so I really didn't mind a one off.

I hope they have the best time 💗

Midnight for music.

11pm latest

I would be fucking livid if there was music playing on a weeknight at midnight. No matter how many notes, chocolate etc had been put through the door. There is no need to do this on a week day in a residential street at all

Music off at 10pm and they should come indoors. They can still party until midnight inside.

However, this morning I had a 6 year old girl screaming (playing, not in distress) at 7.15am. Goodness knows what her parents were thinking. I was up and about, but I thought it was pretty unreasonable for a Sunday morning.

I think I have more sympathy for an end of A level party than for primary school girls who can't play without screaming.

During the week, I think 11.00 pm is about the latest you can reasonably be making a disturbance.
Everyone will need to have said their goodbyes and slammed their car doors and left by 11.00 pm. So, I guess that means the music should be turned off and the party wound up by 10.30 pm at the latest.

On a Friday or Saturday, I think you could add a at least an hour to those timings, probably two hours as a one-off.

I wouldn't worry about changing it a weekend - people need to get up early on a Saturday=Sunday for work, or early as they have plans.

Either way, your neighbours will take it better if you forewarn them.

There is no need to do this on a week day in a residential street at all

I agree with this.

There are going to be almost 40 people in a semi detached house. Absolutely ridiculous.

Op, if you want to be respectful to your neighbours, then you need to move the party to a venue, or at least change it to the weekend.

I think 11 on a week night is late enough for music as there will still be noise afterwards. Definitely go and mention it to the neighbours and it will be fine. My mothers next door neighbour had an 18th recently and she knew it was happening and that the party girls mum was keeping a close eye so as a once off there was no issues .

Thanks for replies! To everyone asking why a weeknight:

Even though we scheduled this month's ago, DD discovered that two different friends had already bagged the Friday and Saturday evenings that week, and there is a cross over in guest lists.

The previous weekend everyone was still revising for A Levels. The following weekend DD says lots of people will have already left to go on holiday /travelling. Subsequent weekends also have the same problem that lots of people are on various summer plans.

It's a date which works for the other person who it's joint with.

It's DD's actual birthday (minor consideration)

I agree.

If you have anyone near that works shift work definitely let them know. Or small children. Babies etc. Or also actually someone very old or frail.
It isn’t just music but people chattering in the garden late into the morning. If people have their bedroom windows open you can turn the music off but don’t forget the voices carry. Especially when they have had a drink.
I would say music goes right down at 11. One off or not. People around you need to sleep.
Some people near us had a ‘do’ and the holiday lets across the road went and asked them to turn it down as it was going on far too loud, and it is their business affected.
People usually are accommodating for a one off. But those who cannot understand what the noise is might not be. Fireworks, if you have any please don’t, especially if you have horses nearby. And consider other pets too. Best not to have fireworks.
Some pretty lights in the garden music not too blaring until 11 will be okay. And into the house from the garden by 12.

Be glad the OP's daughter is not one of a gang of burly, loud, singing, beer drinking, England/Scotland supporters all gathered in the back garden roaring and shouting at every match over the next while.

That's a one off also 😊

I would say letters through all the neighbours doors in advance…. And anyone that backs onto you. Then I would say 11pm end, and try and be firm with that.

If it was a weekend i would have them in the garden until midnight then home as i wouldn't be having 35 teens ( and possibly more because friends will tell friends) in my house after drinking all evening but as it is on a week night you need them all gone by 11.
I hope only those invited turn up.

Midnight with a note for neighbours and not just next door I would go 2 or 3 doors up each side and if you have anyone at the back

Ask your neighbours if they would be ok with an 11pm finish. I had neighbours who had loud parties on Saturday nights about 3 times a year. It was awful.

11pm latest on a weeknight. I think it’s pretty selfish tbh. People will be getting up for work and screaming drunken teens are as noisy and irritating AF

Hire a venue. You’ll piss off your neighbours especially ones that are up early the next day and/or have children.

Well you're going to disrupt neighbours' routines, and no notes or chocolates will compensate that. I just couldn't inflict noise and disturbance on people having to get up for work, trying to get children to sleep etc.

You could just do afternoon through to 9pm if you really must.

Really selfish to hold this on a week night.

If it was the weekend, I'd say in from the garden at midnight and party finishes about 1am.

If the close neighbours had young children, I wouldn’t even consider outside music on a weeknight. But then again, I really like my neighbours, rely on them to feed our rabbits when we’re away, and hate making a nuisance of myself!

If your DD insists on having something on her actual birthay, then why not hire a venue or have an earlier get together with a smaller group of friends?

Almost 40 teens (and probably more) in a semi detached house with neighbours so close by is incredibly selfish.

It might be a bit late but why not have it in a village hall. Where are all the attendees going afterwards?

11pm