Tutor turned up at my house at 9.45pm over a negative Google review – what would you do?

[Booyou123]

Hi everyone

I’m still quite shaken up by this and would appreciate some thoughts and perspectives.

My son attended a private tutor for about a year at the start of Year 5 for the 11 plus exam. After we stopped using her services, I left an honest Google review based on our experience. It wasn’t abusive or offensive, just a negative review.

The tutor was extremely upset by it. She repeatedly called me and my husband, sent so many emotional voice notes and messages, and even contacted my sister-in-law (who also has used her tutoring services) multiple times because she knows her. She told my sister in law that if I don’t take the review down, she’s calling the police as I am violating her business.

The part that has really terrified and shocked me is that she then turned up unannounced at my house at around 9.45pm. She was banging on the door and windows, demanding to speak to me about the review. She was absolutely hysterical, crying and sending me messages begging me to take the review down.

My children were in the house and ran upstairs because they were scared. My son was crying and very frightened, and asked why his teacher was there banging on the door.

I called the police afterwards and was advised to document everything. They couldn’t deploy anyone as they had some major incident in Woolwich, London. They told me that if there were further incidents, the behaviour could potentially amount to harassment.

Since then, she has sent a message apologising for coming to my house, saying she will never do it again and won’t contact me further.

What is bothering me most is that she only knew where we lived because of her professional relationship with our family. I can’t get past the feeling that using a client’s address to turn up at their home over a Google review is a huge breach of professional boundaries, maybe even DBS and goodness knows what else.

Part of me thinks I should just accept the apology and move on. Another part of me feels this was so inappropriate that I should take it further. She’s a woman who runs a professional tutoring company, and she was completely unhinged.

What would you do in my position?

This 100%

I don't think leaving a further review is the right course of action. I think the police will not take it further and that should be acknowledged, though I think there is enough evidence from what the OP has given to think that they should.

If the tutor concerned is a member of a professional body, I think that they should be informed. If her work comes within and requires acceptance by Ofsted, they should be too.

If I thought that the DVLA was a functioning body, I would suggest reporting her as unfit to drive on the grounds of her mental health, the anger shown whilst and after driving to the OPs house.

I cannot see the school being in any way to blame, unless they somehow accept or assist the tutor in advertising her services. If they do, then that should cease.

Hi again

Busy thread and I echo whoever said that a Netflix doc in making. There should be one about reviews and impact on business and users equally.

However, to make things clearer:

X woman is running a tutoring company. She has 9 members of staff working for her. She has, as part of lessons, also taught my son, and my parents evenings have always been with her. She is the one last night who incessantly called, threatened police and turned up at my home.

The following is what my issues were and what I communicated in my review:

I was concerned about the lack of topic coverage in Maths from December 2025, but I was reassured things would pick up after solidifying the basics ie decimals etc. I continued to work with my son at home. In May we were told, he needed intensive tuition at a cost of 800 pounds a month to really get him to the next level and push those scores to 90 percent. Mutiple parents were give this exact same message. After checking my son’s books, I found it was just cramming content that should have been covered in existing lessons. We had 3 parents evenings throughout the year and were reassured his was doing the right number of lessons and his progress was on track. This is not transparent. We should have been told that the number of maths lessons he was doing was not sufficient to cover the content, and now he’s behind. Whereas most tutors are focusing on exam technique this lady is charging extra (to the point we are paying over a grand a month) to teach him what should have already been taught. I also have spoken this morning to a few of my other mum friends at the tuition centre (not about the crazy behaviour, just generally how their kids are getting on) and they are also drowning in last minute fees and have their children behind in content coverage and are now panicking.

My review was simply focused on lack of timely feedback, poor communication and lack of transparency. I don’t want other parents to go through the same thing, or any other child to struggle and to have the best chance at the exam. Kids work hard and parents do to and that should be acknowledged.

When I emailed the tutor and spoke to her, I was told to ‘not play the blame and shame game’ let’s just forget about it, move on, we wish him all the best and he’s such a good student etc.

Anyway I just received a phone call from another tutor in our area (who knows me and our other tutor) who knows what has happened last night (I didn’t tell her) and has requested me to take the review down as this banging on the door tutor has lots of mental health issues and this could significantly affect her.

I guess I have to take it down; I don’t want anyone getting seriously ill or anything drastic to happen.

I think a teacher should be able to coach their own child and know if their own child is progressing well. You'd have to be a pretty useless teacher not to be able to do this.

I find it strange that the child went to the tutor's house, presumably on their own. I used to tutor teenagers. They did not come to me. I went to them. 99% of the time there was an adult present. At the end of the lesson I had a quick chat with the parents and discussed progress. Sometimes the parents sat in the next room with the door open. They could listen to my lesson. Why didn't OP do this?

Does op write poor reviews about her plumber, car mechanic, cleaner, the local shop? Or is it just the poor tutor? I've got news for her. Awkward customers are known amongst local traders. They compare notes. Let's hope she needs an emergency plumber in the middle of winter and suddenly finds she's been blacklisted.

The tutor was out of order. However, whatever was written seems to be so bad that it is unrepeatable. The poor woman must be devastated. Her business may be struggling anyway. She obviously wasn't expecting it, it must have been a shock.

P.s. I bet the kid fails the 11+ anyway. I think parents who put all this pressure on are nuts.

Yanbu to be upset and annoyed that she came to your house, but I’d leave it now, you’ve reported it and it’s on file.

Yabu to tutor your son to pass the 11+, if he can’t pass it without tutoring, grammar isn’t the right school for him as he’ll struggle to keep up. My dd went to grammar and had friends there whose parents had to continue to pay for tutoring throughout school, as they really struggled with the standard and pace of the work

My friend stopped using a childminder because she called her everyday to pick up her kid whenever he cried so she naturally left a negative review. The childminder also lost it and threatened lawyers and everything. Tried to trip my friend up in conversation so she could have something to make a legal case. When that didn’t work, she tearfully begged her to take down the review and my friend did to end the drama. This why I take all positive reviews with a pinch of salt. There is sometimes a lot of manipulation in the background to obtain these.

I wouldn’t be surprised if you’re not the first person to experience this from the tutor OP. Nothing wrong or wasted in taking it further.

No you don't take it down! This tutor is trying it on. If this woman has such serious mental health issues, that she flips over your honest rather than glowing review, she should not be teaching children.
She has already forwarned you that they make parents take down negative comments. This is how they work!
This is still a form of harassment by the company this woman runs!

Just throwing shit in anyhow looool.

This also isn’t true. Grammar school entry has changed from back in the day. Even the brighter kids need tutors to get in these days because of the exam format. Also, having a tutor while going to a grammar school isn’t a sign you can’t keep up. Most kids get tutors in a specific subject and that may be because their learning process requires that extra support.

I think parts of the tutoring industry is the Wild West and this should not have happened! It is good you reported this woman to the police, she overstepped.

However, I really do not understand why a qualified teacher would fall this in the first place. Why did you not teach your own child. Surely you would have been much more on the ball regarding his Maths progress. It all sounds like a complete racket to me.
I prepped my own 4DC and they all got into grammar school and I do not even have any teaching qualifications. So I do not understand why so many people fall for these scams.

I’d leave it, you won’t benefit from another review - why poke a bear?? What will she do if you escalate the situation - you already think she’s bonkers.

If a business can’t survive one negative review , then they shouldn’t be a business.

Your last few lines are lovely OP , I totally support that the tutor was probably just crap at her job (I changed lots of them for 11+) myself), it’s just that review had quite an impact

on the 11+ topic you’re better off getting Atom , it was much more beneficial for my kid , he got amazing offers!

good luck

This. Just leave it now.

Can’t believe the replies here. This nutter turned up at her house at night and was banging on doors and windows. Absolutely NOTHING can be said in mitigation for the tutor.

Don’t take it down!

The pricing structure shouldn’t be a surprise and parents should be asked to pay £1000s a month especially if they were expecting they ‘need’ extra intensive courses.

This could be her standard behaviour to get people to take down negative reviews.

You are not responsible for her mental health. I can see why you are concerned about her working with children as well.

This. She can't go around acting like this. She sounds deranged and people need to know this.

Don’t take it down! She sounds so wild that she could use you taking the review down against you by saying that was proof you were lying and she caught you out so you had to take it down.

As the other tutor seems to know this door-banging tutor, why don’t you use them to pass on a message. I’d ask for an apology; that the tutor makes the pricing and extras clear at the start; and that she never visits your house or makes contact with you or your family ever again. In return for this, you won’t take the police action any further. But, leave your review up. I’d also kindly suggest to this other tutor that they strongly encourage the door-banging tutor to seek MH support.

You left a negative review after using her services for a year and a half

It's her business

She's probably upset

She's over stepped and then some but It seems spiteful to leave a negative review after so long .. did your son not pass his exams

Report her to the police, let her know you’ve reported her to the police, and add all of this to the review.

Please dont take it down. Taking you at your word that your review is accurate and you tried to engage on the issue directly before writing the review then you have every right to tell others your views. That is what review systems are for.

We all use online review systems and they become dangerous if they are manipulated by businesses.

if a business owners mental health cannot navigate complaints, reviews, disagreements then perhaps they need to find another business.

It’s so annoying when people don’t bother reading the OP’s comments before making the same tedious comment.

If you take your review down, then she can continue to behave like that knowing there are no consequences. I would have been terrified if someone had banged on my door like that, and your poor children…. That is outrageous behaviour and I would not want someone like that anywhere near my children. Her mental health is not your responsibility, and other people pressuring you to remove the review is not acceptable. This woman does sound like she needs help, but again, that is not your responsibility. You, and other parents, have paid a lot of money for tutoring and your review was based on the concerns you had regarding your son’s lack of progress. I wouldn’t add another review regarding her behaviour at this stage, but I would not take that review down.

Please dont take it down.

if the bussiness hasn’t been transparent it’s likely impacting multiple families which is something that will impact current and future customers. They (she) needs to work better to ensure trust and transparency in their bussiness. The only way the other tutor would know she had been to your house is via her so it reeks of getting someone else to do thier dirty work!

x

Absolutely do not take it down I would in fact be adding a follow up review of what has happened since and formally email the company if anyone else contacts you in relation to it you will take it further this is actually insane behaviour