The thing I most fucking hate about parenting young children

[Rollitsndpatit]

Up before 6. Every single day. 517 today.

And no MN, I can’t just put CBeebies on and doze, I’ve been kicked in the head, belly and arms. No, they ignore Gro Clocks. No, I can’t just put them to bed later.

I know I’m going to get a lot of ‘well I just don’t tolerate this’ but that’s not my life unfortunately

Oh god I hoped it might have improved by then.

DS was a 5am-er. Then naturally grew out of it just when I had DD. So feels like I’ve had the broken nights / early mornings for forever. Last decent sleep was circa 2020. I miss sleep.

Totally agree - sleep deprivation is the hardest thing about parenting to date (my eldest is 9 so no teenage stuff yet).

I've had one of each. One great sleeper who woke up late, would get herself up and abide by the 'no noise until parents have had coffee' rule. One who wakes up at 5, regardless of anything else and is 100 miles an hour from then.

They're very different experiences of parenting. The whole day looks and feels different.

I'm with you. My 3 year old started singing "is it morning yet" at 3:50am and spent the next hour telling me everything he loves about me (adorable, but could have waited until a more reasonable hour) and wanting to chat about our plans for the day.

On the plus side, his 5 year old brother had a rare sleep in until 6:30 so maybe there is an end in sight?

However, two teenagers 19 and 15 are asleep. Will be til at least 10am.

I am lucky in that I'm naturally an early riser but I agree with pp that I've had to embrace it.

A few months ago I started following Caroline Girvan's workouts on YT so I do one of those at 6am 3x a week, do admin, clear/unsubscribe emails or read a book until it's a respectable time to make noise!

Mine was like this for years, it was hell as I'm not a morning person. Completely changed as a teen but too late for me - in my 60s now and the ability to enjoy a lie in has gone forever 😭

Solidarity here as well. DS is grown up now but I still remember the horrible summer when he was wide awake at 4.30am every morning. No amount of persuasion would get him back to bed.

He’d just got out of that stage when DH decided he was joining a gym and was up at 5.30am five days a week to go there. Obviously he made an almighty racket getting ready and always woke me as well🙄

Then we got a dog and I was out at 6am doing the morning walk for many years. DDog was with me for 13 years during which time I got divorced. After losing him I had two years of blissful mornings when I didn’t have to get up for anything other than work. But last September in a fit of madness I got a kitten and am back to the 4.30am wake ups again!

At 8 and 10 can't they go downstairs quietly themselves? I have two of those ages and they would be firmly told to go downstairs and not to wake me up! I'm only up in the mornings because youngest is 4.

Partner/husband?

I slept in till 7am today while their Dad got up at 5.20 when they woke.

Sorry to disappoint you😔😬 we aren't thrilled about it ourselves but we know it does get better as when they hit 12/13 they usually do turn a corner and start sleeping in later. Feels like forever! I have had four runs at this ( no, too ancient to have any more now)🤣🤣

You have a unicorn!

Nope, they just don't listen. Youngest has awaiting autism diagnosis and there's additional needs with 10yo too. Lots going on. Rather than fight it, we just say 6am they can wander down (our bedroom is downstairs). They have to lie quietly until then. No talking to each other (they share a bedroom).

We shared the load here but it didn't stop me feeling exhausted. He still woke us both up (unintentionally I'm sure) so even if I wasn't physically getting up at stupid o'clock in the morning I was still awake at stupid o'clock.

I’m with you all. Two of mine are early risers and 100miles per hour from whenever they get up (between 5 and 5.30 usually) and the third will sleep til 7. However, the one who sleeps til 7 also doesn’t go to bed easily! Other two, once their heads hit the pillow they are gone. Youngest, nope, awake til 10pm last night when I gave up and went up myself.

Like others, DH and I spilt the weekend mornings and have one lie in each.

I remember those days, it was hellish. I used to get infuriated when the clocks went back and people would say ooo, you get an extra hour in bed. No, I fucking don’t, I get woken up at 4.30 instead of 5.30!

You won’t want to hear this OP but mine are teenagers now and I’d give anything for just one morning where their 3 year old selves climb into my bed and snuggle up.

That’s lovely @SereneFinch but it is the difference between visiting somewhere and living there isn’t it? I do feel guilty that I can’t wait for them to grow up but truth is I don’t really enjoy toddlers and all the exhaustion that comes with it.

Mine would not get up before 7am. This sounds like gloating and tone deaf until I say he'd rarely be asleep before 11pm and would still come in and disturb me up to four times a night until he was 6.

I'd have taken just getting up early if it'd meant I could have slept unbroken from 10pm to 5.30am.

It gets better after that. He at least doesn't disturb me all night...

I suppose the difference is once they’re older, unless they have other needs, you don’t need to get up with them. My 5 and 8 year old will often take themselves downstairs to watch tv if they wake early.

The early years are so tough OP, traumatically so! It gets easier every year in my experience. Not easy, but easier.

One of mine is a bit like that @RedToothBrush . Not as extreme but it was 930 last night before he went to sleep but then slept until 7. Then the other one crashes at 7 but always up way before 6.

So this means I have no me time whatsoever and it does get me down a bit. Hoping things may improve a bit.

What is frustrating is that DD is tired. She whingey and flinging herself about and knocking my phone out of my hand, kicking me (her legs are just everywhere) but won’t sleep 😩😩

It’s a game changer when they can get up and amuse themselves. Mine are 7 and about to turn 4 and for the last year or so, they get up and play together or 7yo puts the TV on for them both. They still come in to us from time to time to ask for stuff or just tell us something, but it’s so much better than getting up for the day at 5:30!

Hang on in there!

My sympathies. We had early risers. My sister is in the trenches at the moment with a 5am riser. They just have to alternate.

It's worse at this time of year as well!

I think I actually said ‘fuck summer’ the other day, at twenty past four 😩

It’s not the same though, even if you have to pick up a teenager you can still go back to bed. Toddlers seem to suddenly be wide awake at stupid o clock and ready to go immediately and you feel awful ! It’s the worst

Sympathy from me. My eldest used to be up around 5:30. It got a bit better once he was at school.
The upside of living in a tiny house was that I could hear everything when he went down and put cbeebies on. I used to put a juice carton and cereal biscuit out for him.