What are the worst opening chat-up lines you have heard?

[SaraHoliday]

Tell me the worst opening chat up lines that you've received online or in person...

In person and whilst sitting on an aeroplane:

We were sitting next to each other (purely by chance) and been having polite conversation for about 2 hours....

"I'm going to have to get your contact details or I might have to hijack the plane...." 😵‍💫

I used to work in a bar so I've heard more bad chat up lines than I've had hot dinners! As such they are totally unmemorable. However the VERY worst follow up to a chat up line (after my response was a polite 'my husband wouldn't like it') was 'I wasn't asking your husband'.

"If you sleep with me, you'll find there is a bridge between Venus and Mars".

Is that a mirror in your pocket as I can see myself in your pants…

Your clothes look great, they'd look even better on my bedroom floor 🙄

I love fine dining Indian restaurants, and only a few weeks ago, I was in my local one, one evening. It was just me; I was sitting there having a lovely Indian meal and a lager when this bloke at another table came over and said

''I love your handbag, but it would look far better on my bedroom floor, along with your clothes''.

Urm, nope!

Student dinner party. Man next to me started stroking my arms, and said: “You have lovely hairy arms. In Russia, we know what that means.”

Strangely, that was not the start of a beautiful love story.

Not mine, but I remember a student friend saying that some drunk guy came up to her in a club and whispered in her ear 'You'd give a snowman a horn'.

We used to see him around the city and campus and would start whistling or humming 'Walking in the Air' (which, as I'm sure he had no memory of his char-up line, must have mystified him if he ever realised he was pursued for the rest of his undergraduate years by random women humming the same tune...)

“I don’t usually go for brunettes…”

He wasn’t expecting me to reply “good”.

You win!

"I was told by God I was going to marry you."

My response was that He hadn't told me.

A bridge to infinity and beyond for him! 😄

Is he referring to the profound emotional and metaphysical connection between a male and a female in romantic harmony - or is that just what he calls his willy?!

I found this a bit scary but at a previous employment, one of my colleagues was trying to impress a Nurse he'd met.

He made syringes with notes inside them detailing all the dates he wanted to take her on asking her to pick one!

It didn't work.

We all felt so bad for him as he was such a nice guy. ❤️

One of my exes - should have been a red flag: ‘get your coat - you’ve pulled’.

I assumed he was referring to his dick. Surprisingly, I went on a second date but didn't bother with the third.

Someone shouted "Spanner!" at me from the other end of the bar. I gave him the requisite withering stare and he responded: "D'ya get it? Because every time I look at you my nuts tighten!" I think I said something about how Shakespeare would have been jealous at such a moving sentiment and moved far, far away...