Help! What am I getting for my birthday?

[IveChanged]

My husband has just appeared behind me and held a tape measure up to my back while I was making dinner. It is my birthday coming up. What on earth is he buying that requires him to know how long my back is?!

Sex chair?😂(ignore me if you didn't see that thread)

Long length polyester nightie??

Chocolates and flowers! I think he’s just messing with your head.

A massage chair. A proper one.

For the skydiving harness?

A jacket or a dress. That would be my idea of hell!

Did he measure across your shoulders, or down your spine?
edit ignore, just reread your last sentence. I'm out of ideas.

A back brace?

A scratchy nylon negligee.

🤣

As long as it's not preloved 😂

He only measued from my shoulder to my waist. And using a tape measure from the shed so it's a very rough measurement. I would hope a polyester nightie would be floor length...

I would be really happy with this but he does have form for weird gifts. Last year I got 2 plastic watering cans 🫤

A backpack

Wow is this a thing? A custom size massage chair would be epic! But unlikely given his previous gift history...

What’s the usual budget? If he generally spends £50, it won’t be a massage chair! Do any of his relatives knit? Is someone making a jumper?

My mum's partner gave her a skydive for her 69th birthday and I was very clear at the time that I would never want to throw myself out of a plane to celebrate another year on this earth.

He has bought me some hideous clothing items in the past so I truly hope not. Think high neck itchy orange jumper dress (I wore it once and it made me hot and irritable. I also looked ill because orange is def not my colour).

I do need a new backpack but why would he need my shoulder to waist measurement for this? I've never seen one without adjustable straps.

Oh jeez his Mum does knit. Mostly children's jumpers with animals on the front 😳

A stab vest? Or a back protector incase you ever go horse riding?

She’s branching out into adult jumpers with animals on the front 🤦‍♀️