Worried about my 17-year-old swimming in lakes and rivers with friends

[Ketley67]

I’m worrying myself sick. DS is 17, a few of his friends have learnt how to drive, add in this glorious weather and of course they’re wanting to go to areas with water to swim in.

Yesterday they went to a river, today they’re going to a lake. The lake permits swimming but I’m so worried about them all! I’ve explained the dangers to him.

Not enjoying this age where they’re got a taste of freedom but haven’t fully developed their common sense!

cold water shock is unlikely at the moment - the rivers and lakes are pretty warm - it’s the sea that isn’t and nobody is issuing advice saying don’t swim in the sea,

Maybe in the SE, but Scottish lochs are always cold, get very deep very quickly and hardly a summer goes by without a drowning.

My whole post was about how given that the OP couldn't stop her son going and that it can be safe to swim in lakes if you follow safety rules, then she should teach her son various things about safety, including wearing something brightly coloured. I was addressing the OP's concerns directly.

On average five people die on the roads per day.

Ten people have died swimming in the last few days. Vastly, vastly more people are on the roads each day than engaging in open water swimming, so I would imagine that the opposite is true. Wouldn't you?

Now up to 11 deaths with the death of another teenage boy being confirmed. This is so heartbreakingly sad. Those poor families.

It’s excruciating all these teenagers who have died over the past few days in open water. I am lost for words at the sheer number to be honest. Absolutely heartbreaking 💔.

Why on earth aren’t parents keeping an eye on their teenagers when they’re going out? It seems like parents now will have to check where their child goes in hot weather and warn them if it’s water. Seems like a lot though have gone in rivers and lakes and a reservoir this week. There is not a chance I’d swim in a river or lake no matter how safe it looked and I’m a fairly strong swimmer. At least if you’re in a pool there’s lifeguards there. Is there no public information film out about this danger? There should be.

Near me a child/teenager died in a swimming lake in Beckenham place park a few years back, it was immediately closed for swimming and now used for supervised water sports only.

I agree they need the adverts back again. On prime time tv. And in schools.

Exactly. If you do swim in a lake or river you need to be aware of the cold water shock, weeds, possible weir. Swimming in a lake or river is far different to in a pool and kids are often confident and having fun and don’t think about the conditions, until they get into trouble in the water. Where I am we have lakes in parks but as far as I know I haven’t seen people swimming in them.

Another teenager has died.The total is now 12 !,

And we’re not properly even in summer yet either. I was reading (here and online) and it’s mostly teenage boys. As pp said certain places like rivers and lakes have reeds and other dangerous parts. That was why I always as a teen went to a pool or lido. I mean they cost money but surely a parent would rather pay for them to swim safely rather than have them in potentially dangerous situations. How many teens tell their parents “oh I went swimming in the lake/river” and equally how many parents warn their teens not to swim in lakes/rivers, no matter how safe they look. Equally as said here before it’d be good if schools or somewhere had safe water etiquette so if they do go in lakes/rivers to do so safely and be aware of any dangers.

No actually she doesn’t ask about what she should teach her son or what he could wear 🤷‍♀️

she is just telling us that she is worried and rightly so

15 deaths now, 11 children and 4 adults. Just so awful, don’t ever remember this many deaths in such a short space of time. Something really needs to be done to help. This can’t continue. 15 families lives changed forever needlessly.

I just feel so sad for all the life's lost and families broken.
Junior slater the 12yr old who died in the river ribble last week has really upset me.
My son is 11 and that same day told us he and his friends had also been swimming in the same river just a different location.
Frightening and I hope he now k ows not to.

Tell them not to swim in open water, too dangerous.

I’d just stalk him to be honest. Jump in my car and follow him and his friends and then hide behind the bushes while they enjoy their freedom with little awareness of dangers.

Yeah I found my 11 year old went in to the river today as well. Some lady encouraged him to ( I wonder if she the town drunk) and said good luck when he went in. He’d never do it but he heard his mate did that ,so he wanted to try it out. The water got all the way up to his chest. He was crying for help and some people didn’t do anything but ONE that reached out his hand and pulled him up. My son was so happy and said he was his hero and that he loves him lol . I was out looking for him on my tracker app. I’m just so sad I missed him when he was in the river , breaks my heart knowing how scared he was

I was reading and the 4 Sri Lankan young men who died swimming at Camber Sands were apparently very good swimmers. So it can happen to anyone. Warn your teens/kids not to do this.

This is useful.

NB it doesn't tell you not to swim, but how to reduce the risks. Teens might respond better to something like this than a blanket ban on swimming.

https://www.outdoorswimmingsociety.com/10-tips-for-summer-swim-safety/

Humans are very bad at risk assessment. If we have done something once and it was OK, it's difficult for us to appreciate that perhaps we were lucky and its still dangerous.

That's really good advice, much better than just telling teens no as far too often they won't listen when its really hot and all their mates are swimming.

I've been swimming in the sea this week with my kids which provided another opportunity for water safety education for them as one day it was really windy and the waves were knocking me over, DS really wanted to swim but I was able to show him how dangerous the sea can be and that we can only swim in the right conditions (he's used to calm lakes which always have the right conditions) so we left (even though the lifeguard told me to just swim through the waves to get further out, which I felt was a poor example for the children)

That really doesn't sound like good advice! (From the lifeguard)

Yeah didn't feel like good advice to me but i expect she knows the conditions better than me so knew it would be calmer once I got past where the waves break, but that wasn't an example I wanted to set for my children

I think 'if in doubt, don't' is a key principle when getting into any water!