What’s the stingiest thing you’ve ever seen a friend do?

[zappp]

I have an (ex-)friend who is very stingy. She earns plenty and is happy to splurge on herself and show off, but when it comes to others, she is mean with money to the point where I’ve felt really taken advantage of on multiple occasions. It’s almost like it’s a game for her; seeing how little she can pay and how much she can extract from others.

The friendship fizzled out when I started calling her out on it and stopped covering her costs (I previously didn’t want to make things awkward, especially in a group setting, but it got to a point where I was too pissed off to keep being polite).

Against my better judgment, I recently attended a group dinner that she was also part of - a mutual friend was in town and this was the only time we could see her. In the WhatsApp planning group, she’d enthusiastically agreed to the restaurant choice - it was definitely a nicer place, but not extravagant.

When she got there, she claimed she wasn’t hungry and didn’t order any food, only to ask the waiter for an empty plate and help herself - rather generously - from everyone else’s food!!! She also asked for a glass for the wine we’d already ordered, which would’ve been fine, except guess how much she chipped in to the bill…? Exactly, zero.

It was also a bit embarrassing towards the restaurant; it’s hard to get a reservation and the group was small enough that it was strange for one person not to be eating at peak dinner time, especially as we were seated at a big table.

This time I didn’t even bother calling her out - it was so brazen that she basically called herself out.

I know you never truly know someone else’s financial situation, but she’s certainly spending enough on clothes, holidays, and skincare to make me think she could afford a plate of pasta and glass of wine…

Anyway, rant over, I want to hear other stingy stories!

My colleague bought a lovely dress from Reiss to get married in. After the wedding she took it back and got a refund.

Five second rule!😂😂😂

My friend got involved in a religious cult and said she wasnt allowed to buy us presents ever again as it wasnt allowed but got married and the cheapest thing on the wedding list was £75

I was looking after a friend’s baby and she got grubby in the garden. I changed her into my DD’s spare clothes (same age). Not that it matters but they were nice clothes (designer items). When my friend came to collect her she said she would wash and return them, after admiring how nice the outfit was.

Well it took her months to do so - even though I saw her frequently. When the clothes were returned they were outgrown and so over washed and worn out it was insulting. Literally about 3/4 months later even though I kept reminding her.

She blamed it on her husband - that he kept putting their child in the outfit.

Same woman used to ask to have items I was selling on marketplace and never pay under her assumption ‘friends don’t pay friends.’ Fair enough the odd time I don’t mind gifting a pal. I never offered non payment, she told me!

However, after she had helped herself to a couple of large and costly items I told her they were actually my kids’ belongings ( their toy kitchen / a bike etc) and that the money was for them so if she couldn’t pay I’d rather she didn’t take them. She said that was fine but then tried to pay for my Costa (around £7) in lieu of items worth about £25. She thought she had got away with it until I said that’s fine - but £18 outstanding! She claimed not to carry cash so I requested she send money via PayPal but she refused to do it until she got home and really dragged it out.

I am very generous in terms of treating visiting children when they’re in my care or gifting friends generously. I also like hosting dinner and tea parties and pride myself on putting on a good spread. I think she mistook my generosity but I didn’t like the lack of control and how she would weasel extras out
of me.

what I remember particularly was the detail that he wasnt actually part of their department yet he managed to get himself invited to their and all the other departments meals out and pulled the same thing AND the fact that he was totally indignant and admitted that he would never have ordered so much if he had known he would be paying for it!

Oh I’ve just thought of another! My friend brought her car to uni, the only one out of the group of us.

In the morning before lectures she’d often text “I’m going to X place before our lecture, does anyone want a lift?”

Usually hungover and running late wed all go to wherever she was meeting us. She’d drive us to uni and before she’d let us out of the car she’d ask for petrol money and for a proportion of the parking permit she was paying for!

I picked my friend up from the airport (3 hour round trip) to stay with me.The next day she asked to go to an attraction an hour and a half away. I again drove and paid for parking. She drank a bottle of wine with dinner ( cooked and paid for by me) every night but didn't buy any.

On the last night she went to the off licence and bought 4 cans of gin and tonic which she drank as she was 'wined out'.

If course I then had to do the 3 hour round trip back to the airport.

Thats actually fair enough, taking extra people everyday will cost her in petrol, and you were benefitting from her paying for the parking permit.

Ooh another one:

Heavily pregnant sis in law bought a wedding dress off the peg from Debenhams. Wore it all day with the tag still attached and then returned it the next day!

I don’t think it is, when she was going there anyway and would’ve been using that petrol and parking space. She’d charge us about £4 a pop each, so from one morning at lectures could make £12! Repeated every week and she had a nice little side hustle going

I really hate that (see my post!). People using shops as a free loan service. Awful.

I'm somebody who is genuinely just not very well off, who has friends who earn well and like to go to nice places. I often feel guilty and like I am taking the piss if they've paid for way more things than I did, though I'm always honest about how much I can afford to do and spend up front, and incredibly grateful if they pay. (I also make a point of babysitting so they can have nice couples nights out, baking fresh stuff for them, and those types of favours that cost very little but are appreciated). Reading this thread makes me feel slightly more reassured about myself - I've never asked for an extra glass for somebody else's wine or made myself a meal by stealing from other's plates!

78p… between six people? Was this you? 👀

once I went out for some dinner with some people from work, one of the guys announced he had a taste card and that it gave you BOGOF meal in that particular restaurant. When it came to paying he said he’s settled because his meal was the free one. The minute he left the whole table burst out laughing at the audacity.

The work one
Bill splitter karma | Mumsnet

just to see what would happen I ordered a final coffee as I knew this would change the billing arrangement

That is so funny!

Okay but surely you all got wise to that very quickly and it only continued to work if the people she was offering it to actually wanted what she was offering for the price of her lift?

Gifted a friend a flight, worth 150/200 because some vouchers where gifted to me when someone ideally loved was too sick to travel
She offered to pay for airport parking and cases but i said no no we will just split the costs of parking etc let's just both have the flights as a treat

then she asked for a euro as when we split lunch bill mine was 1 euro more than hers ......

Yeah after the first year of her doing it we all got pretty bored pretty quickly. Funnily enough, when we all stopped saying yes to lifts she got fed up of driving and started getting the bus 😂 she’s still like it now, if we all meet up and she offers a lift she’ll ask for petrol, and often text for a £2 coffee while the rest of us just tend to let it slide!

I’ve got two, both in restaurants. One was a friend who went back to the table to pick up the tip that I had put down (it was enough to cover 10% of the meals for all three of us as I was embarrassed the others hadn’t left anything).

The other one was the woman who made the waitress take back the bill and take off the service charge off. I think she made a profit as I’d already put more than I’d cost in to cover my meal.

Just cringy.

The thought of her sweating and eating in it all day. Ick. They earnt out of their wedding as they had a small post ceremony lunch in a restaurant after the registry office, which my parents in law paid for (groom’s parents). We then went back to parents in law’s house where bro and sis in law requested 10k - the same amount we been given towards our wedding (we had a big wedding and my parents paid the lion’s share). Parents in law only went to their safe and handed them 10K cash! She put it in the same carrier bag her dress was in 🤣

The wedding was so basic they didn’t even want to buy a cake so I bought a DIY wedding cake from M&S so they could at least cut it and take a nice photo.

So many people saying that a friend pocketed the tip at a restaurant which someone else had left!
I can't believe that it happens so much! Awful.

What a lot of non drivers, or well off people who dont clock such things, dont realise is that she would be using far less petrol to drive herself than 3 other people as well. When the kids all went to uni within 3 years, my fuel costs dropped massively as I was just driving me in that car instead of all of us. The more weight in a car, the more fuel is needed.

And while it did add up, you didnt have to accept her offer. You knew what it would cost and chose to accept those terms. You could have walked or got the bus instead.

We go out for dinner with friends every few months. Their share was always more than ours but we just said that we’d split the bill . That was until they started to order extra portions of mains & deserts to take home in doggy bags for the next day’s lunch - with no offer of paying for them .
We called them out after the first couple of times but they still try it on every so often .

I drive. I also don’t offer people lifts then demand payment for said offer.