What’s the stingiest thing you’ve ever seen a friend do?

[zappp]

I have an (ex-)friend who is very stingy. She earns plenty and is happy to splurge on herself and show off, but when it comes to others, she is mean with money to the point where I’ve felt really taken advantage of on multiple occasions. It’s almost like it’s a game for her; seeing how little she can pay and how much she can extract from others.

The friendship fizzled out when I started calling her out on it and stopped covering her costs (I previously didn’t want to make things awkward, especially in a group setting, but it got to a point where I was too pissed off to keep being polite).

Against my better judgment, I recently attended a group dinner that she was also part of - a mutual friend was in town and this was the only time we could see her. In the WhatsApp planning group, she’d enthusiastically agreed to the restaurant choice - it was definitely a nicer place, but not extravagant.

When she got there, she claimed she wasn’t hungry and didn’t order any food, only to ask the waiter for an empty plate and help herself - rather generously - from everyone else’s food!!! She also asked for a glass for the wine we’d already ordered, which would’ve been fine, except guess how much she chipped in to the bill…? Exactly, zero.

It was also a bit embarrassing towards the restaurant; it’s hard to get a reservation and the group was small enough that it was strange for one person not to be eating at peak dinner time, especially as we were seated at a big table.

This time I didn’t even bother calling her out - it was so brazen that she basically called herself out.

I know you never truly know someone else’s financial situation, but she’s certainly spending enough on clothes, holidays, and skincare to make me think she could afford a plate of pasta and glass of wine…

Anyway, rant over, I want to hear other stingy stories!

Does anyone know why people act like this? I’d love to understand. Why are they not embarrassed?

One of her favourite tricks was thinking I was her lackey. When we were in shops she’d ask me to hold her bags whilst she put her change away in her purse etc then walk off leaving me with her bags. One time we got outside the shop and I just put her bags on the ground and kept walking, after 5 minutes she asked ‘where are my bags?’ I said ‘where you left them. I held them like you asked then put them down!’

She loaned me 20p once and went on about it so much I got out my copper jar and wrapped 20 1pences in Christmas paper and handed it to her (it was December). She loaned me it on the Saturday and I gave her it back on the Monday at school. She’d reminded me about 300 times.

The worst thing she did..,,snog my boyfriend in a nightclub making sure I saw it. He was an arsehole too tbf!

Friends bought a property abroad and kindly invited us to visit. We made sure we paid our way by paying for all meals out and a supermarket shop, to which she added all household cleaning products and washing capsules. He pocketed the tip at each restaurant.
They took us for trips out so my husband gave him cash to fill up the car. He half filled it and pocketed the rest.
Back home they moved into a house which needed quite a lot of renovation. My husband spent his days off decorating for them, sorting the garden, fetching supplies. He didn’t want payment but they said they would like to take us for a meal to say thank you. The first pub they suggested was vetoed as they considered it too expensive. We settled on a carvery. I was told I didn’t need a starter or a dessert!!
We don’t spend time with them any more 🤔

This makes me laugh because I have identical twins, and they have never ever in their lives pretended to be each other (and I haven't pretended either, to be clear!).

My own cheeky fucker moment was taking one of them to a party, had the other trailing with me as too little to sit in the car on his own. The mum said something along the lines of "oh, I didn't realise he was a twin - does his brother want to stay too?". It was some sort of soft play I think. I of course asked him, he said yes please, and I thanked her and left the extra child.

It was literally years later when I read a thread on here about parents dropping off uninvited kids at parties that I realised I should have at least offered to pay for the second child, but honestly, it didn't even occur to me. I still cringe when I think of it!

She asked you; you didn't ask, assume or impose. Perfectly reasonable!

DH went to visit his wealthy but stingy parents who live in another country so he only sees them a couple of times a year.
When MIL cooked the evening meal for her, FIL and DH, because she didn't want his visit to cost her any money, she cut a fish into three pieces and they had one piece each! Now that's fucking stingy!

Does anybody remember a thread from ages ago where OP's MIL was demanding that her adult DSs each paid her an actual 'wage' every month (amount as sorcified by her), to pay her back for all that she did and paid for for them as children?!

As stinginess threads go, that one truly was something else. As I recall, she stated that it was obviously only fair, even though she had never felt the requirement to pay her own parents once she came of age!

Some people have no shame and want to take as much as they can and give zero back.

In the 90s my auntie and uncle made me and my sister (ages 8-10) hide in the boot of their car when going into a safari park to avoid paying for tickets for us. Their kids were under 5 years old so they didn’t need to pay for them.

I agree! I was just so taken aback by her behaviour I suppose. And I was far less confrontational.
If anything, I should almost thank her for the experience 😂 I’d never allow myself to be in that situation now, I’d 100% order more or refuse to split!

No, we don’t all do that.

Had your parents given them the money for your entrance fee?!

My late DF had a saying about anyone who he thought was particularly stingy. "He's that tight he could peel an orange in his pocket" 🤣🤣

When FIL died, MIL, without discussing it with any family members, arranged for her parents grave to be reopened so that her late husband could be buried in the grave to save her having to pay for a grave for him. When family members discovered that the grave had been reopened, there was a furore and it was closed.As my FIL was buried during COVID and MIL couldn't be there, she asked for a video of the burial to make sure that the grave diggers didn't take the brass handles off the coffin for themselves!
After the funeral, the total cost came to £6,000 which she tried to get my DH to pay. We later discover that she had the best part of £1M in the bank. All money that my late FIL earned of course.
Now, that's really fucked up!

I like that😀

Madness. Absolute madness. People shouldn't host if this is their attitude.

Why are people like this? (and as demonstrated so often on this thread, these are people who usually have plenty of money to spend on luxuries so it doesn't even make sense)

I do know three women who work in charity shops to get the first pickings. All live in £1m + houses, all had children in private school. Two had designer resale businesses. One was a tip pincher.

I would like to add that in the days when I was desperately short of cash for the very basics( thank god those days are over), the people who helped me out were those who had little money themselves.

I remember being about 12 and my parents took us on a ghost tour (very popular in the city I was born in)

My parents,me and my 3 brothers (last two are twins)

They shoved me and one brother out of the way when it came to paying so they only paid for themselves and my twin brothers (who they claimed where 2 years younger than they where,so theyd pay half the price)

And they got away with it-bro and I just tagged on the end of the group not knowing we hadn't been paid for

All to save £5/6

They used to take us to a well known northern theme park

They claimed the twins where under 5 until they where about 8 so they'd get in for free

They got away with it as nobody really checked and took their word for it

You would believe the howls of outrage when they where pulled up on it as the twins where too big to be under 5 and they had to pay

Same day it was a heatwave and we where so thirsty

She hadn't brought any drinks so we had go thirsty (bought herself drinks which she drank when she thought she was out of sight of us)

I remember being so thirsty i thought I was going to die-she did,in the end,send us to drink water from the sinks in the toilets-'cup it in your hands!'

Never went back

You don't get to be rich enough to go on multiple holidays a year by giving out free coffees 😀

They're abusive. Are you still in contact?

A few come to mind:
Friend 1 will ask if anyone wants an apple. Say 5 people say yes. She will slice one apple into 5 pieces. Then when they have finished ask if anyone would like more apple, then take another one and divide it by the number of takers.
Friend 2 when at Uni she paid less as she had the smallest room. Fair enough. But then moved her boyfriend in and, using complex calculations, worked out she would pay 19p a week extra to cover his showers etc.
Friends 3 A few years ago now but a couple, both lawyers earning six figure salaries, would rush to leave any social event at a certain time to avoid paying the next hour of the babysitter’s £5 per hour charge.
Ex h Many examples. Him earning £200,000 whilst I earned less than 25% of that. He once gave me a total summer holiday budget of £2,000 for four of us including flights , accommodation and food. Kicked off regularly over DDs dance class costing about £15 per class.

No

I went nc years ago

I could tell you tales that would make your hair stand on end

Thing is,that was normal-he doesn't spend anything (and if he has to,it almost kills him) and shes happy to spend on herself but resents every penny she has to spend on anyone else

It's weird as id give you the shirt off my back but they are tighter than a ducks arse

@Stardancerintheskye that's good you got away. Are your dbs NC too?