What’s the stingiest thing you’ve ever seen a friend do?

[zappp]

I have an (ex-)friend who is very stingy. She earns plenty and is happy to splurge on herself and show off, but when it comes to others, she is mean with money to the point where I’ve felt really taken advantage of on multiple occasions. It’s almost like it’s a game for her; seeing how little she can pay and how much she can extract from others.

The friendship fizzled out when I started calling her out on it and stopped covering her costs (I previously didn’t want to make things awkward, especially in a group setting, but it got to a point where I was too pissed off to keep being polite).

Against my better judgment, I recently attended a group dinner that she was also part of - a mutual friend was in town and this was the only time we could see her. In the WhatsApp planning group, she’d enthusiastically agreed to the restaurant choice - it was definitely a nicer place, but not extravagant.

When she got there, she claimed she wasn’t hungry and didn’t order any food, only to ask the waiter for an empty plate and help herself - rather generously - from everyone else’s food!!! She also asked for a glass for the wine we’d already ordered, which would’ve been fine, except guess how much she chipped in to the bill…? Exactly, zero.

It was also a bit embarrassing towards the restaurant; it’s hard to get a reservation and the group was small enough that it was strange for one person not to be eating at peak dinner time, especially as we were seated at a big table.

This time I didn’t even bother calling her out - it was so brazen that she basically called herself out.

I know you never truly know someone else’s financial situation, but she’s certainly spending enough on clothes, holidays, and skincare to make me think she could afford a plate of pasta and glass of wine…

Anyway, rant over, I want to hear other stingy stories!

Name changed for this as could be very outing.

I have an aunt who is known for being very very stingy but is definitely comfortable financially.

She very proudly talked about how she had put her hand in the toilet to get money out that had fallen in (not her money to start with) - the amount? 5p

She also decided one Christmas that she was going to wait to buy her Christmas dinner until 30 minutes before the supermarket closed so she could get the ingredients reduced because that was how she regularly bought her food - this was when supermarkets were smaller than they are now, closed for both Christmas day and boxing day and didn't overstock in the way they do these days.

Of course, the shelves were pretty much bare - she ended up with a frozen vegetarian lasagne and garlic bread as their Christmas dinner!

I’m baffled by some of these.

”My friend is better-off than me, yet she expects me to subsidise her whenever we go out and she also steals tips from waiters. But she’s still my friend”.

Find better friends! Or learn to enjoy your own company. Why on earth would you pay a CF to spend time with you?

WTF?!

I really hope none of you have gone out with him since?!

Exactly! The people noting these things, and outraged enough to post about them, often years later, on the internet, but not pulling someone up on them at the time and maintaining an ongoing friendship with the person are part of the problem.

Exactly. I can honestly say nobody I know has done anything like this but I would absolutely say something!

I imagine that, in the moment, people are either too shocked to say anything, or feel constrained by politeness not to make a scene, @Shinyandnew1.

It’s a lot easier to know what you should have said in hindsight, or when you aren’t actually in the situation.

When I was 18 (and I'm 45 now) I went out to TGI Friday's with a huge group of people who I didn't know that well - it was a work colleague's 21st birthday and I hadn't worked there long. Most of the guests were her friends from outside work.

This one girl was noticeable because she was the only person who ordered three courses and multiple expensive cocktails. Then at the end, she said she only brought £5 (one cocktail alone cost that!), put it on the table and left so everyone else had to cover the shortfall.

I don't know who she was and never met her again, but I've never forgotten it.

I hate splitting the bill in general anyway as I don't drink so 99% of the time I end up overpaying and feeling resentful. The last time, the person who suggested splitting the bill had to leave early but underpaid (genuine mistake), the other couple had had steak and wine and also rushed off. Whereas I'd intentionally ordered cheap pasta dish and no DRINK and was left holding the bill for £20 more than I'd spent. Never again.

I know the tipping culture here in America is out of control, but we don't steal tips. And, at the very start of a meal, when the server takes our orders, they will usually ask "One check or separate?" and if they don't, we will let them know our preference. It is so typical and expected, nobody bats an eye.

What?! Why on earth would you do that?

This is fraudulent and known as wardrobing.If you need a specific outfit for a one-time event but don't want to keep it, a legal and ethical alternative is to use clothing rental

I hope you don't talk to her anymore, the nasty witch. Even making out your son was lying, awful behaviour.

Not spoke to the old bitch for over 15 years (its a mystery to her why)

I was there-i heard her say she'd take him (and was amazed as she didnt normally bother)

Shamefully,it wasnt the last time she pulled a stunt like that but I went nc with her in the end

Shes a nasty woman

But many posters say this happened over and over again. They say they maintained friendships or married or stayed married to the people who did these things.

As a one-off, sure, I can absolutely imagine that someone might be too taken aback to speak up. But numerous times? Staying friends with people who steal tips from waiting staff, and exploit their friends? There's no excuse for that.

Mn loves a 'Cheeky Fucker', but no CF can exist without a Wet Lettuce to enable him or her.

Either you're trolling or you have no sense of right and wrong.

Gotta be the first one, surely??

Friends of family would join us for meals out when we visited. Every time without fail they would complain loudly about the food the service or both. They demanded a reduction in their bill. I realised it was a thing and soon refused to meet up with them. I bought the children a few bowls of chips after a trip to the beach and while children were finishing their game the parents demolished all the chips and looked at me to pay for more. CF.

I have a similar story! I lived in a flat share with a girl who would constantly help herself to things in my cupboard or on my fridge shelf. I tried to confront it by asking both her and our other flatmate “hey, did you use my tomatoes?”, “has someone used up my milk?”, etc and she’d either deny it or place the blame on the other girl. Maybe it was our other flatmate too but it’s a bit too much of a coincidence that things would go missing only when she was there.
I got into a routine of only food shopping daily as if I did a big shop on a Monday by the time Thursday came around, I’d be missing ingredients for whatever dish I was making.
Towards the end of living there I had pretty much moved into my boyfriend’s flat, so I only nipped back and forth until my tenancy ended and even then, she’d raid my cupboard for stuff. She opened a posh hot chocolate that she KNEW I’d recently been gifted for my birthday and an expensive bottle of olive oil that a friend had brought me back from Italy.
Her audacity baffled me – it’s one thing stealing regular ingredients but to open gifted or expensive stuff when I hadn’t tried them myself?!

That’s the worst yet. How mean!

That is beyond cheeky!!!

I remember my FIL telling me about one of his colleagues who invested in a rather expensive camcorder (long before the days of digital cameras and smartphones) for the sole purpose of getting free holidays.

He would book and pay as normal, then go on the holiday and enjoy it; BUT, whilst there, he would engineer something outrageously unacceptable that he claimed had happened - with video 'proof' - and then demand all of his money back, as well as trying for compensation in addition to that.

I'm sure they wouldn't care, but I wonder if the people who do this kind of nasty thing even realise that one or more perfectly hardworking and conscious workers will be called to account and could face sanctions, negative marks against their performance records, lose pay or even lose their jobs - just so that some horrid CF can steal from their employer.

@Stardancerintheskye I am sorry, that sounds completely horrible for you and your son.

That reminds me of a case I read about, where an office worker enjoyed very hot and spicy food, so her (personal, clearly labelled) lunch in the office fridge reflected this, with plenty of extra chili added where you might not automatically expect to find it.

One of her colleagues stole her lunch from the fridge and tucked in. He was not expecting the level of spice and he was not accustomed to it - and he felt extremely unwell as a result fabulous example of FAFO.

The brazen CF actually complained to HR that she had 'tried to poison him' and they took it seriously, until the truth came out that it was just her own normal preference for herself and that the only reason that he ended up eating it was because he had knowingly stolen somebody else's food. The level of shamelessness is breathtaking.

This is what puzzles me. How do these people not quickly run out of new marks and find themselves thoroughly alone and with nobody else to tap for their freebies anymore?

Do they just live in enormous cities or travel around a lot or what?!

This thread is fascinating 👀

Some people really are CFs!

I hope your lovely friend recovered