Do some people genuinely not notice their own lines and wrinkles?

[stetha]

Just read on another thread a woman claiming to be mid 40s or older with not a single wrinkle and using no skincare other than a cheap £1 moisturiser. Hey I can’t see her but so many times I’ve had people say this to me in person, how they don’t have any wrinkles and yet I’m looking at their face and yes, yes they absolutely do!

Now I don’t mind lines and wrinkles I have a few myself but what is going on! Why do so many people, even those who are quite heavily lined and sun damaged insist that they haven’t any lines and everyone is shocked to hear they are a day over 21? Do other people have magic mirrors? Or perhaps there is an epidemic of untreated long sightedness?

Yep.

Is you life really that boring and small that you are bothered about how other women perceive themselves?

I would much prefer that women could embrace their natural faces and love themselves.

As the awesome Linda Hamilton puts it “this is the face I’ve earned”

In their mind's eye, older people tend to preserve a self-image that is frozen in their early thirties, and this heavily influences what they see in the mirror.

It's only when they see actual photographs of themselves that they realise how much they've aged.

i think that even if you don't have many lines and wrinkles your age and experience shows in your eyes, as we move through life and its ups and downs our eyes show what we have seen and lived. The sparkle goes, well it has with me, I have lived through some very wonderful things but have also had significant trauma and loss and I think it shows in my eyes. No crows feet to speak of, but a weariness and a wariness.

Always good to be told off by the thread police 🤣

Mumsnet is known for being full of babyfaces. There have been threads where 40 something year olds have said that delivery drivers/sales people ask if their parents are home when they opens the door and are gobsmacked when they tell them their age and that it’s their house. There was also someone who insisted she had no wrinkles at 65 and also that her mum had no wrinkles in her 80s, others insisting that at 50;they get mistaken as their teen children’s siblings. There was a woman who posted a photo saying she got mistaken for much younger than she was. She was attractive, well groomed but looked around her actual age. They’re delusional.

This thread reminds me of when my gran had her cataracts done. She said she regretted having them done because it made her wrinkly 😂

I would assume they can't see them.
It would be bonkers to look someone in the eye and claim you have no wrinkles if they can see that you do. So they must not be able to see them.

My sister is pretty much crinkle free while I look like Im wearing a Droopy mask made of crepe paper. 😁

It's just skin. It doesn't matter. We all go wrinkly in the end.

And that's why I don't use my reading glasses when looking in the mirror...

I actually have a saying in my head that is "wow, can you please tell me where you bought that magic mirror that you look into".

I don't actually care what other people are doing, but there are a few women that I know that talk about how young they look, and how they have no wrinkles. They are so vain. I would never dream of saying things like this out loud.

My 80 year old MIL claims not to have any wrinkles. She asked one of my family members "how old do you think I look" and they politely declined to answer (because she actually looks older than 80 IMO) which really put her out.

Once my step mum had a massive falling out with my SIL because she bought her some face cream that was for mature skin (anti wrinkle etc). My step mum was about 75 at the time and was a massive sun worshipper and smoked 30 a day all her life and her skin was awful. It was like leather and was wrinkled both horizontally and vertically. According to her she looked young and had great skin.

So, to answer your Q, some people are clearly deluded.

Ha ha. Love that.

I've only ever seen people say that on here and can only assume they are mistaken, especially if they're white.

There’s a couple of online adverts at the moment which really make me laugh. A woman asks you to learn in while she tells you the secret that she’s 53. She looks 53 - plus some! And there’s another who won’t tell you her age but suggests we think of how old she looks and then add a decade. I think she looks about 80 anyway.

Both make me laugh but at the same time, good on them for thinking they look ace. To be fair, they both look great for mid 50’s and I’m guessing late 70’s so they can crack on feeling fab. If I met anyone in ‘real life’ who was at the age where most women start feeling invisible and self conscious about aging, I’d celebrate someone feeling fabulous and youthful too ❤️

Gosh, you sound like someone with a lot of time on their hands! Who cares about other people’s wrinkles? I don’t even care about my own wrinkles, on the basis I can’t see my own face!

I'm 62 and just have a few lines around my eyes and mouth when I smile. I think it's down to being overweight and having (still) oily skin, plus always wearing foundation from a young age. I don't think I look young for my age though, because I have bad skin with open pores.

Yeah my 45 year old friend I mentioned upthread is black but even other black people are surprised to hear her age. She could genuinely and easily pass for 20s if it were not for the more mature elegant way she carries herself! Some people really do look younger than others.

@stetha

I am 45 and I am sorry but I do not have any lines and wrinkles at all. And I use £1.99 Simple moisturiser - have no skin care routine to speak of.

I have zero sun damage.

My mother, my grandmothers on both sides - same - aged exceedingly well.

Some people just do not age in the same way.

They might mean they don’t have any dynamic wrinkles (when their face is at rest) so when they look at themselves in the mirror, their face will be relaxed and probably look like there’s no wrinkles. When they are talking/ using facial expressions - which is what you see when they are interacting with you, they are dynamic wrinkles. They probably don’t see these themselves because who stands in front of a mirror talking to themselves or making faces lol.

I also find this with overweight people. I’m overweight myself but I know I am. Yet I have a few friends who are like size 16-22 and will say thinks like “oh I’m not fat tho” or “since I’ve lost a lot of weight” or “im not thin but I have a flat stomach” and I’m like are they in denial or trying to convince themselves?! I’m not sure but I just smile and nod lol

I feel like most of us tend to think we look younger than we do.

Or they’re just finishing for compliments/validation.

There are so many women that are hyper critical of themselves (I know, I'm one of them) that I can only feel happy for someone who is so confident in their own skin.

It doesn't matter whether they are 'right' or not, it's just nice to see someone happy about how they look for a change!

I'm personally looking forward to my 'magical hag in a swamp' days. I might even get a cloak.

Can I ask with asian and black skin, to white people we think they often look young for their age. But to other Asian and Black people do they look their age as other signs of ageing are looked for? Hopefully that makes sense?

Can’t lie, I’m currently a size 16 and when I looked at myself in the mirror I’m alright with it, but when I see body photos of myself I look the size of Pluto.

I do suspect you get used to your shape and become blind to it. I was thin most of my life and it’s like I can’t picture it anymore.

I didnt understand your question - may you clarify? I am interested as a black woman.

I think it’s vanishingly unlikely for people not to have some fine lines from 40 onwards. Even those with relatively great skin. I am sceptical of those who say no wrinkles at 60!

I like my wrinkles. I am 55 and have them. I don’t need to look 30 or 40. I have never met anyone my age without any, whatever skincare regime they use.

Anyway, from this thread I appear to be the only Asian that ‘raisins’ ;-)

I am Asian and can def see signs of ageing in Asian friends and family. And some people age better than others. Lots of sun exposure ages brown people as much as white!

Some of it is stress as well. My mum looks a bit young for her age, looks early sixties not late sixties. She does however look way better than she did when she was married to my dad. Love my dad, but he was a menace when he was drinking heavily and it dulled her. It’s like all his alcohol related skin damage was passed on to her as well. Younger looking doesn’t always mean better, she looks way better now she’s happy and healthy. I’ve seen it with so many people, they leave a high stress job or a high stress man and it knocks a few years off.

I guess the real beauty hack is to LTB 😭.