Ds scared of situation in Iran

[TwoHoots74]

I’m home after a wonderful Easter holiday and after asking my son (20) how he is and how was his Easter he replied he was really scared about the situation tonight will bring in Iran.
Ive tried to reassure him but I don’t think it’s worked. He generally looks fearful and I don’t know what to say to mage it better.

why is the world so shit?

He clearly wasn't being serious but it demonstrates it's on their minds.

This thread is eye opening.

Do teenagers, young adults and their parents in the UK really quiver in fear because of some daily mail headlines?

What else are they doing in life? Are they doom scrolling excessively? This is not a healthy outlook. I grew up during the Cold War and we didn't care and just did the usual teenage stuff and had fun.

To those with yp who fear conscription, tell them to get fit, start running, join a gym, learn essential survival skills maybe join territorial army or cadets, and other than that go out and enjoy life.

Madness.

No, conscription is a real possibility. Look elsewhere in Europe. This is happening and armed or cyber conflict is a possible, probable threat. Trump is a lunatic and bully. Can't be helped, no use to quiver in the corner, do something productive.

The trouble with this approach is that it teaches young people to not share their worries. My mother didn't care about my worries. She found them inconvenient and didn't want me harshing her mellow. I learned to be as little trouble as possible to her at my own expense.

There is a middle way that many of the folk on this thread are taking. Listen to the worries, provide comfort, share information and then talk about how there are things we can control, things we can't and talking about ways to deal with worrries e.g. talking with others, keeping busy, doing something positive in your own community. That's how to raise young people isn't it? Not to call them a name and let them stew?

I was born into a 'don't bother me with your fears and worries' era.

I've spent over 40 years struggling alone with life's worries for fear of bothering other people. It makes you shut people out and you never have that comforting feeling of a problem shared is a problem halved. I learned the middle path later in life and am glad others have cottoned on earlier.

We’re not even at war. Trump is chest beating. Honestly, it’s like people on here get off on the hysteria. And even if conscription was brought in, how do you propose the government are going to force millions of young people to fight?? Seriously, chill out.

This!

Both our DDs are in their early twenties and obviously aware of the situation in the Middle East.

But there's absolutely zero hand wringing, panicking and doom mongering. DD1 is very much more occupied with extensively decorating her flat and an upcoming holiday. DD2 very much focused on her exams and going travelling this Summer.

Much, much healthier all round. I think this is mainly due to benefitting from having very pragmatic, level headed parents who always took a very sensible approach to handling their worries and concerns.

"I grew up during the Cold War and we didn't care and just did the usual teenage stuff and had fun."

Millions of young people were also marching and campaigning for CND.

There were anti-cold war protests across the world, women at Greenham Common and second cold war protests in the 80s. Also considerable anti-Vietnam activity at that time.

Lots of young people DID care, just as they do now.

And all that would be fine. Great even. But we are not talking about protests or caring. We are talking about panic.

We are a bit closer to the region, living in southern a European country - that also has mandatory military service for male citizens.

Political discourse here seems to be a robust part of young people's communication with each other, and that perhaps results in less panic during situations like this.

My youngest dc12 is absolutely tuned into what is going on and shares concerns but nothing more than questions needing reassuring. Eldest seems a bit more jaded at 20, but not overly anxious.

However, I think it's mean spirited to sneer at pp's on here whose dc are in a panic. It's an age group that hasn't really enjoyed periods of stability as we did at that age. It also shows they are tuned into geopolitics and are paying attention as opposed to an endless diet of TT and Love Island

All we can do is keep an open dialogue and reassure. I feel some wobbles over all this tbh, but I mostly oscillate between anger and sadness for the loss and human suffering. The sense of helplessness is very real.

We did care for this, what with my dm being an ex hippy. I even organised a protest march to support WWF in primary school on my initiate with no mummy input at all. But we didn't run around in a panic fearing the end is nigh. It's exaggerated and unhelpful.

Why is your son unable to sleep over 2,000 deaths in Iran over the last month but was able to sleep over 40,000 deaths in Iran in January?

What are his views on the Sudan civil war, the Myanmar civil war and insurgencies Mali, Burkina Faso, Niger and the Democratic Republic of Congo this year, in which each one has been far more deadly than the Iran war?

Honestly what a ridiculous argument.

There are very few people in the world who don't recognise that this aggressive action from the US is in a different category in terms of the threat to world stability.

Some people like to feel morally superior though.

Older one volunteers for an NGO who were actively involved in trying to mitigate, so I think he felt less powerless then. This probably rubbed off on younger one because they talk to each other a lot.

I think it’s difficult being a young adult who is actively trying to make a difference in the world. Maybe they should take advice from some on this thread - stop reading, stop caring, stop being involved, plan a party and go shopping instead?

I was born in the 60s and in all honesty I've never had any real worries. Politics is mostly rhetoric and sabre rattling and in Trump's case all mouth.
I believe that behind the social media crap real diplomats are keeping things moving.

I also believe that conscription won't happen. Even in America where it would be likely to happen first.

Mhm, where did you read this? Why is it not possible to be productive and contribute positively as well as enjoy life and manage worries and fears? I believe people have been doing this for ca. 300,000 years?

Right. WTF has that got in common with a petrified bloke doom scrolling all night?

If that’s what their mother has taken from the thread then I’m astounded that they were actively involved in mitigating the situation in Iran back in January. Can’t actually believe it. In fact, I don’t 🤡

Totally agree. We encourage far, far too much navel-gazing and performative anxiety in young people now.

You're literally saying you're not bothered about 40,000 people dying - only a much smaller amount because in your opinion their deaths don't risk global stability?

Wow.

If their mental health is being damaged by being too upset about global events then, yes, absolutely they should stop paying attention to global events

The myth of feeble British youth. Some are, but most aren't.

It’s highly unlikely to effect us for ages unless it all gets out of hand very quickly. Apart from the bloody cost of everything. However as a teen of the 80s. I get it as I was worried then. I’m not now. But I expect social media isn’t helping. Maybe encourage them to switch it off and just use one good news source.

of course I’ll add I am worried for those in the actual
ME.

Exactly...

What on earth are you on about? You think NGOs weren’t involved in Iran? Or you think a PIR student wouldn’t volunteer at an NGO when it’s directly relevant to their degree and career choice? (You do understand that volunteering for that age means making the tea or fundraising, right?)

I agree with you there.

However I do think there is a big difference between someone’s “mental health being damaged”, and someone being worried (on behalf of those impacted) by a world leader threatening genocide.