Who Pays for family holiday with adult children?

[yh8181]

Do you ask for a contribution?

How old are the adult children and their partners? Are they earning? The answer to this question is very different if your child is 45 and an office manager to if they’re 18 at university.

There is no definitive answer. I think the important issue is setting expectations.

Tricky. But going by many threads on here, a lot of people don't want to use their annual leave, never mind their money, to go on holiday with their in-laws. Is that the issue? Who is instigating these holidays?

We pay for ours and their partners … they all work hard but don’t earn a lot and times are hard at the moment.

We’re in a different financial position and are thrilled they want to join us on hols.

Ha! We are part of the “sandwich” generation where it seems we pay for the (very) adult children AND we pay for our parents! No one is paying for us!!!

Surely, if everyone is an adult, then each person pays for themself?
If these "children" don't want to do that, then they don't go on the holiday.
It's very simple.

I’ve just paid for a weekend away with all my family, but the adult DC will be paying for all the food and drinks.

Depends. My parents would pay up to age 21 because we were students and had no money for holidays. I suspect also they knew we would spend any money we did have going away with friends instead of them. They did take our adult partners along once when were age 20 and 23, and paid for their accommodation and meals but not their flights.

Later when I was working and went on trips with my mum we split everything. Now we have kids she pays her flights, room etc and we pay for all ours and then we split meals.

I know life is expensive but we pay. My children couldn't afford a holiday otherwise and we love spending time with them. But they're both single and young adults.

I'm single and have 2 single adult DC, a DS and DD. I will sometimes go on holiday with one or other of them (they have different interests, different places they want to visit). Generally we pay our own way. They earn close to what I do and our expenses are similar so I'm no better off than them. That said, I will still treat them to a meal or two.

We didn't have a sudden cliff edge where one minute I paid, the next I didn't. It started out that they would pay for their flights, I'd cover hotel, meals etc. Then as they started earning more they'd pay their flights and a proportion of hotel costs and so on. Until we reached the current situation.

My parents never paid for anything for me, so it's not as if I benefitted and didn't pass it on. If I had, I would!

They go on holidays with their partner but we did take them on holiday with us 2 years ago and paid for everything. This year they are off with her family and with us and both sets of parents are paying a decent contribution towards everything. But it’s easily affordable for all parents and they are both very recent graduates,

We pay for everything. It’s our treat, we can afford it and we’re glad our young adult kids want to still go away with us.

I think it depends on circumstances. My Mum usually pays to take my brother on holiday cos if she didn't he would never go anywhere. My MiL took us once cos she took pity on us cos we were skint so took us on holiday to celebrate her retirement. But if the adults kids can pay their own way they should tbh I would not want to go on holiday with my parents. I'd rather just go with my husband.

We go on holiday with my parents every year and they always pay, but I think it depends on financial situations. I would still go away with them even if we had to pay because we love going.

I’m 31 and going on holiday with my parents, siblings and my husband and baby in May abroad. My parents have booked the accommodation for us all and although offered do not want any money. Myself and my siblings have paid for our own flights and will take our own spending money although my parents will probably buy bulk of food shopping etc. We’ve done something similar in the last few years where some/all of me and my siblings have gone on holiday with my parents with the same set up. Obviously we are fortunate our parents can do this but if they didn’t it would likely mean we wouldn’t go on holiday with them due to cost. Ultimately my parents want us to go on holiday with them and that’s why they cover some of the cost. They are over the moon to go on holiday this year with their first grandchild.

We are paying for the accommodation and they will pay their travel costs. We will split the food bill and buy for everyone together
for eating in. If we go out it is likely we would pay. My son and his GF are both working.

Depends who chooses holiday - if my parents were going on holiday and chose all the details of the holiday, it wouldn't be at all what I would choose and so I just wouldn't go if expected to pay for accommodation. I would pay for flights though so I could join them.

If it's a joint holiday where destination/activities chosen together, then more appropriate to split.

We pay accommodation and they pay travel for our lot.
3x dd 29,26,20 and 2 x spouse of the older two .
they seem to like us as we do lots together which is lovely.

My DPs parents have paid when they have invites us but we always insist on giving a contribution. If they don't accept then we pay for lots of food, wine etc. if we're planning a holiday together then we always insist on paying our own way.

With my parents each adult couple has always paid for themselves

Ours would always come if we were going anywhere nice, and paying! They were always good company, so we were happy to shell out for holidays they wouldn’t have had otherwise.
(Early/mid 20s sort of ages, no long term partners to think of.)

If I want them to come, I pay for them. 2 are at Uni so I think that’s fair.

At 18, it never occurred to me not to pay and I wouldn’t have been invited if I hadn’t.

I chose to pay to to on 1-2 family holidays when I was 18-19 and by the time I’d done a year at uni, I wanted to go with friends instead and prioritised that.

I think it's completely different for each family! If you can afford it and want to treat them then great. If they want to pay for themselves even better. If they want to treat YOU then fantastic!

With me and my mum there was never anything set in stone. Sometimes she'd pay for everyone, sometimes I would, other times we would split 50 / 50.

This one is tricky. When I was in my 20s, if I had spare money for holidays I would definitely not have chosen to go with my parents. Sounds mean, but it was always much more fun with my friends.
My parents paid for us if they picked the holiday and invited us along.

I only ever went on holiday to my aunties house in my mum's European home country when I was a kid. Then when I was working full time I went on holiday with my boyfriend/friends.

I've been to my cousins place in Spain with my mum, auntie and uncle once as an adult. I just paid for my own share of restaurant meals and bought a big load of shopping (ok mainly booze) for the house.

I think they wanted some kind of upgrade on the flights which I wasn't fussed about so my mum kindly paid for that for me. I think it was easyJet so it wasn't like we were in Business.