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Partner talking to random people …would this bother you?

70 replies

luluxxx · 24/03/2026 09:27

Anytime we are out he just starts speaking to random people.
Not just like your basic conversation,he will try and involve himself in conversations etc
Examples
We were out at the weekend and this guy had a drink spilt over him …my partner taps him
”oh I seen you got soaking ,bless you” taps me ..look at that.
Then says to the guy he will dry his coat on the back of his chair (guy was standing )
We can be in a bar at a table and as we are leaving he will shout to some random person at the bar “we are leaving do you want this table “
About to get in the car and he will start pointing at a car saying “we are leaving ,do you want our space “
Sat in a restaurant and a couple will be chatting and he will say something to them to join in.
Would this annoy you ?
or is he just friendly /helpful ?

OP posts:
SlightlyFriendlier · 24/03/2026 09:38

Asking someone standing in a crowded pub if they want your table as you’re getting ready to leave is entirely normal, ditto in a crowded car park with people waiting for a space. Interrupting conversation at another table in a restaurant in order to join in definitely isn’t.

EasterlyDirection · 24/03/2026 09:44

Agree that asking if someone wants your table or space is entirely normal, joining in conversations in a restaurant less so, but sometimes people do it and I don't mind, I'm always up for a bit of a chat. Not if we are discussing personal and private stuff but if we are just chatting and they have something to add to the conversation then fine. I was on a train with DD recently and we were doing the crossword in the Metro together and someone in the seat opposite helped us with a clue and we all ended up doing it together, it was nice.

SlightlyFriendlier · 24/03/2026 09:49

EasterlyDirection · 24/03/2026 09:44

Agree that asking if someone wants your table or space is entirely normal, joining in conversations in a restaurant less so, but sometimes people do it and I don't mind, I'm always up for a bit of a chat. Not if we are discussing personal and private stuff but if we are just chatting and they have something to add to the conversation then fine. I was on a train with DD recently and we were doing the crossword in the Metro together and someone in the seat opposite helped us with a clue and we all ended up doing it together, it was nice.

I think what you describe on the train is quite usual, and nice, but I don’t think that eavesdropping on the conversation of people at another restaurant table and inserting yourself into it is at all normal. Maybe if it’s somewhere like Wagamama where you’re sharing tables and crammed close together…?

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Chewbecca · 24/03/2026 09:53

I read all his remarks in a Yorkshire accent 🤣 is he from Yorkshire?

I don't think I would like this but I am very used to SE/ London ways. I have visited Yorkshire a lot (mainly west yorks) and find there is much more in the way of general chit chat with strangers. When I get used to it, it's nice, friendly, warm, welcoming but is always a jolt at first.

CurlewKate · 24/03/2026 09:56

not sure about joining in with a conversation -I would need more context- but all the other things are just normal interactions, surely?

Devilsmommy · 24/03/2026 09:56

It's a shame really that more people don't strike up conversations with other people. Obviously you don't eavesdrop a conversation and insert yourself in it but otherwise I don't see the problem

CurlewKate · 24/03/2026 09:58

Chewbecca · 24/03/2026 09:53

I read all his remarks in a Yorkshire accent 🤣 is he from Yorkshire?

I don't think I would like this but I am very used to SE/ London ways. I have visited Yorkshire a lot (mainly west yorks) and find there is much more in the way of general chit chat with strangers. When I get used to it, it's nice, friendly, warm, welcoming but is always a jolt at first.

Well, I do this and I sound like Princess Ann!

Dooodaaaaadooo · 24/03/2026 09:59

Your partner sounds lovely. Absolutely nothing wrong with being considerate and chatty. I get into conversations with random people and it’s fine .
So many people are so insular these days and dont/scared to want to speak to others.

EasterlyDirection · 24/03/2026 09:59

SlightlyFriendlier · 24/03/2026 09:49

I think what you describe on the train is quite usual, and nice, but I don’t think that eavesdropping on the conversation of people at another restaurant table and inserting yourself into it is at all normal. Maybe if it’s somewhere like Wagamama where you’re sharing tables and crammed close together…?

Yes, I was thinking of places where you are closely next to each other, pubs etc. Not fine dining or romantic nights out! I think it depends how the person reads it too, if they get a brush-off response and carry on then that is awkward, but if the people being spoken to engage then that's fine.

CeffylCoch · 24/03/2026 09:59

As long as the other person/people are happy to chat it wouldn’t bother me to be honest. He sounds friendly and kind

Zfdgcc · 24/03/2026 10:00

He sounds like a nice guy, so no it wouldn’t bother me at all.

Noodge · 24/03/2026 10:01

CeffylCoch · 24/03/2026 09:59

As long as the other person/people are happy to chat it wouldn’t bother me to be honest. He sounds friendly and kind

I agree
I am from Yorkshire though!

CeffylCoch · 24/03/2026 10:04

Noodge · 24/03/2026 10:01

I agree
I am from Yorkshire though!

My gran was from Yorkshire. She married my Grandad who was from Glasgow, and we’re in North Wales. I have actually been asked by someone if I was from Yorkshire once after they heard me speak 🤣

ShamrockShenanigans · 24/03/2026 10:05

He sounds lovely but then again I'm Irish and we're fairly well known for being a friendly bunch.

I'm curious as to why you're asking though.

Has he only just become like this now?

2026Y · 24/03/2026 10:07

My Mum chats to everyone. She always comes home from places telling me that she got someone's life story on the train / in the supermarket / at the Doctor's surgery etc. She always seems surprised but I've seen her in action so I'm not surprised at all 😂

I wouldn't really bother me (I'm reasonably chatty too and enjoy human interaction). Pressumably he's always been like this?

ainsleysanob · 24/03/2026 10:12

As a person with a very strong Barnsley accent please can we differentiate between said accents/dialects when we discuss Yorkshire accents - they’re all very different! 😉

OP, I see nothing wrong with what your partner does!

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 24/03/2026 10:22

He sounds nice and friendly and more extrovert than you

parkezvous · 24/03/2026 10:40

Sounds just like my DH! Lovely that he’s so friendly but always wants to chat!

Brightbluesomething · 24/03/2026 18:00

Another northerner here. Nothing wrong with what he does or says. I do the same and regularly chat to random people. Although my ex (grumpy Yorkshireman) hated it if I bumped into anyone I knew when out, or even chatted to strangers in a queue as he was simply miserable. If I’m out with friends I’m always the one they send to speak to strangers (needing a spare chair etc).
Maybe he’s just in the wrong part of the country and needs to come up north to be appreciated.

DirtyBird · 24/03/2026 21:06

He sounds very friendly which is nice. however it would probably make me anxious as I would think he's annoying some of the people he's talking to. (I dated a chap similar to this and I could see the annoyance on some of the faces so I know it can happen lol)

Coxonutdream · 24/03/2026 21:15

luluxxx · 24/03/2026 09:27

Anytime we are out he just starts speaking to random people.
Not just like your basic conversation,he will try and involve himself in conversations etc
Examples
We were out at the weekend and this guy had a drink spilt over him …my partner taps him
”oh I seen you got soaking ,bless you” taps me ..look at that.
Then says to the guy he will dry his coat on the back of his chair (guy was standing )
We can be in a bar at a table and as we are leaving he will shout to some random person at the bar “we are leaving do you want this table “
About to get in the car and he will start pointing at a car saying “we are leaving ,do you want our space “
Sat in a restaurant and a couple will be chatting and he will say something to them to join in.
Would this annoy you ?
or is he just friendly /helpful ?

Asking if someone wants your table/parking space etc is one thing but I think the last scenario of joining in other conversations can be rude to people you’re with if you keep chatting to randoms and then the person you’re with is a bit left out or forced to join in when they may not want to. I’ve been in that scenario! It depends how often he’s doing that last one really.

Coxonutdream · 24/03/2026 21:21

It does depend though. I’ve been out solo or with others and there’s been situations where myself /the group I’ve been with have all gotten chatty with another group and it’s been fine.

I recently made two new friends abroad while I was eating out alone!

It was clear that had both consulted with each other before approaching me to join my table, so they were both keen to chat and no-one was left out.

If just one person out of a couple was talking to me I’d feel awkward and end the conversation if I got the sense that it was maybe annoying to the other one!

maxslice · 25/03/2026 18:03

I love chatting with random people who seem open to it. I’ve met some very interesting folks. There’s research that suggests that these brief, pleasant interactions have health benefits for everyone concerned. I would NOT drop into what are obviously private, personal conversations. I find too, that I get approached (often by older women) who share their stories or who think that I work at the shop/ pub/whatever and have a question. I always help them if I can. However, DH is not like me. He’s used to me being that way. But he can get impatient and sometimes embarrassed. DH has very little interest in speaking to anyone he doesn’t already know. And that’s fine. We just accept that we are different.

tommyhoundmum · 25/03/2026 18:30

Dooodaaaaadooo · 24/03/2026 09:59

Your partner sounds lovely. Absolutely nothing wrong with being considerate and chatty. I get into conversations with random people and it’s fine .
So many people are so insular these days and dont/scared to want to speak to others.

Our dog gets me into conversations with people I don't know every day.

MsDitsy · 25/03/2026 18:40

ainsleysanob · 24/03/2026 10:12

As a person with a very strong Barnsley accent please can we differentiate between said accents/dialects when we discuss Yorkshire accents - they’re all very different! 😉

OP, I see nothing wrong with what your partner does!

I agree, I have a strong North Yorkshire accent but literally cannot understand a word my nephew who has a West Yorkshire accent says and we are both In our 60s. His wife translates 🤣