Horrible incident on train

[TheAverageJoanne]

On a train to Leeds. Woman chatting on the phone, quite loud to be fair in what sounded like Spanish and a man across the aisle kept saying loudly "shut up jabbering." Not to her, just in general. He then got up waved his hands around in front of this woman's face and started saying several times "Me no speaky language" thank god he got off at the next stop which was coming up. Fair play to her she carried on with her phone call. I doubt he'd have said this if it had been a man on the phone.

Problem was he spoke down, not up

Up/down the point is she was rude and annoying for speaking on her phone for a lengthy period.

Good on him for saying something.

I remember seeing a video clip taken on a bus of a woman in a niqab talking to her son in a foreign language. A man near her told her off for not speaking in English. Another passenger had to point out she was speaking in Welsh and as they were in wales, it wasn’t a foreign language!

Blimey, given your title I expected something a lot worse than someone telling a loud woman to stop jabbering. The xenophobic part is obviously bad, but on the scale of "horrible incidents" that happen on trains, this is pretty mild.

He had justification to be annoyed until he started being abusive, there were far better ways to have dealt with the situation. Both parties were wrong but he stepped over the line and was abusive.

Did she have her phone on speaker too?

I was in a hospital waiting room for a consultant the other day, they had the radio on with relaxing music as it was a challenging treatment for most. This guy came in and started listening to YouTube or suchlike on full speaker mode on a high volume. He was asked by a nurse to use headphones or turn the speaker off. He turned it off. 5 minutes later he rang someone and again had it on speaker and continued a two way conversation at full volume. You couldn't hear yourself think, it was really frustrating. The guy next to him, who was waiting for his wife to finish her consultation, asked him to turn it off, and the guy just stared him down and continued.

5 minutes later the consultant came out and said she was running late and the gentleman who was due in after me had a translator who was pushed for time so would I mind if he went first, I said fine. It turned out it was the speaker guy so I assumed he had no idea what we had been saying to him but on his way out he rang for a taxi and his English was pretty good.

I get you may need a translator for medical stuff but I think his English was sufficient to understand the comments re his phone, he chose not to. Its just manners in my mind to respect the peace of others.

So back to the train incident, neither acquitted themselves well, but there is no reason to be rude/racist.

I can't work out if you're trying to be a cunt or are one?

The something he said was "me no speaky language" while waving his hands in her face.

Why on earth can't people just say 'Could you keep the volume down a little, please?'

It's not 'confrontation', it's a polite reasonable request. Communication.

But he was clearly a racist ignorant twat.

They both sound awful tbh. Not one manner between the pair of them.

This isn't a 'horrible incident', OP, and not worth thinking about afterwards. Just a bit unpleasant on two levels.

Maybe he had ADHD

@RosePetalsRose glad you find men intimidating women so funny!

Since you hate men bashing women, can you explain what stopped the man asking her to keep it down? Why couldn't he manage to act within the social norms, when his issue was that she wasn't acting within the normal range of public behaviour?

He acted like that because he's a piece of shit, and I can't understand why you'd defend that

They absolutely do and there are some holiday destinations where they don't try to hide their distain of tourists. Not saying that makes this situation ok though

And? He’s letting her know she has being annoying.
He hasn't called her any names or attacked her.

He made fun of her for being foreign.

How would you like that if someone made fun of where you come from?

A tinny sound or someone speaking in another language are not objectively anything to worry about.

The world is full of things that unsettle some people quite a lot, and other people can just zone it out. Learning to zone things out can be done, saving energy for what matters.

In terms of racial abuse, Lewis Hamilton and various footballers come to mind.

So, yes some of them unfortunately do.

Awful behaviour from that man! I wonder if British people in Spain experience that level of rudeness?

Tourist protests? Having water sprayed on them?

Oh never mind. Obviously you don't understandy threatening behaviour.

Yes point taken but he could have done it differently. He was saying loudly to nobody in particular about jabbering on and then doing the hand waving thing and taking the Mickey isn't how to go about it.

I find your ridiculous comment funny.
The man was not intimidating the woman.

Your comments come across more aggressive than his behaviour .

How did he threaten her??

He sounded awful!
Although, i agree with other posters that speaking "quite loudly" on the phone in any language in a confined shared public space may irritate others.
Rule 1. Dont take phone calls that are "quite loud" in a confined public shared space unless an absolute emergency,its rude 2. if you encounter a rude person jabbering away in any language on the phone in a shared public space ,don't do as this rude man did,its rude.
If you know you are prone to misophonia meltdown (many nerodiverse people are,) noise cancelling technology is helpful or book a "quiet carriage", worst case if you feel the person on the phone is violating an unspoken rule of the social contract of a quiet shared space inform staff,move away if possible or use noise cancelling technology.
My son suffers severe irritation from misophonia and we wouldnt travel on public transport without noise cancelling headphones for this reason.

Both behaved like dicks imo - he was being a racist twat, she had effectively stuck her middle finger up at everyone in the carriage.

Yes you're right. I've seen the light, obviously someone waving their arms in your face is not at all threatening. Well argued Rose.