Ds is five and can’t use cutlery

[toohotwiththeheatingon]

He uses his fingers generally; it’s awful when you see him grabbing fistfuls of food 🤢

I’ve just lost it with him after half his dinner ended up on the floor. Seriously feel like I’ve got a weaning baby.

Not sure what to do tbh.

My son is 6 and a half and will still use his hands if at all possible!
He struggled with all things fine motor, but have seen a big jump all of a sudden this last 6 months or so. I can read his writing now!

I spent 15+ years working with toddlers so I knew what to offer him activity wise to try and strengthen his hands and develop those skills too, so it wasn't that he didn't get any of that. It's just taken him longer. He can now use cutlery, but like writing it is still a physical effort. I don't want every meal time to feel like hard work so I encourage him to use them to start with but then don't say anything when he gives up and picks his food up/grabs a spoon instead of a fork.

So no answers for you OP. Just wanted to add a voice that wasn't blaming you!!

Have only skimmed the thread but it’s not just dyspraxia to keep in mind- DD is dyslexic and struggled with fine motor skills when she was younger including like your DS scissors and cutlery. She’s 8 and has only just cracked proper knife and fork skills. At 5 she was in no way capable, but I didn’t let her throw it around with her hands, we just had to chop everything for her then she’d spear with a fork. New easier to use cutlery is a great idea, as is eating with them more and modelling proper use- but agree it’s not something you tend to explicitly teach like the alphabet. And I’d be pretty strict on the hands as it’s just messy and gross, but do help with chopping up because if you can get him eating without using his hands that would be a win and the knife coordination can come later.

Finding cycling difficult was a sign of my dds dyspraxia. Plus poor throwing / catching. Slow dressing.

She still finds shoe laces and cutlery difficult, she's 13.

We use wobble cushions from Decathlon. Cheaper than specialist stockists and he's been using it for a good 8 years if not more.

Oh god, the shoe laces... they can do them up, but they both struggle with the tension which is a PITA on parkrun mornings when neither wants to risk a loose lace.

Tooth brushing was another slow burner skill...

OP you just have to keep going. If he’s 5 and at school it’s time he sat at the proper dinner table and you should eat with him. Keep going keep going keep going. Tell him it’s a fundamental part of being a person who is liked and respected. It really is you know. I once saw a woman in a pub eat fish and chips with her hands it was absolutely disgusting. My DD took ages to use a knife properly. Would stab things with her fork. I just kept on encouraging her to eat in a dignified way. She’s grateful now.