Advice regarding nursery /school settings?

[WhyMee5688]

Help! Advice needed
Lo (3) has started local pre school where older siblings go and she will too
However she does a day and half private still as it works for work! And been going for a year and loves it settled etc.
Now my problem is after she is shattered after the days at both venues falls asleep on the way home 4pm ish and then is a nightmare screaming etc
Seems happy when she’s there but terrible mood after and tears on drop off!! They both require two days which means she’s doing four days! I don’t need that much and now wondering if I have made a terrible mistake doing too much too soon! what would you do? Perseverance? Both day she’s happy and enjoys it when there? But two places I’ve since heard not great/ confusing etc
it’s just her siblings go to the school and she will too including around 20-25 out out of the class she will be in will go there! She also has a speech delay and is behind in her development in a lot of ways
the private placement seems to be more play and the school more structured and learning plus they have a speech development program and a lady that visits there twice a week to do work with the children that requires help with their language skills.
. but on the other hand we now love the other nursery and staff where she’s been going and it’s open all year not just term time and she goes 1-2 days in the holidays.
Would you pick one?
I just don’t know what one I’d choose 😞 both are good but in v different ways

I personally think multiple settings is confusing

Id just send her to the one where she’s content. And seek additional support for the delay.

Could she still use a sleep during the day?

Yes probably most days but then she goes to bed really late so perhaps not! Argh so tricky

I personally would keep her at nursery. Play based is so much better for their development at that age. Engage with a speech therapist outside of nursery if you need that.

OP Does she get upset being dropped off at the preschool also? If you can get wraparound care at the preschool morning and evening so you can work (I know lots of preschools do this) then perhaps its worth doing for the school prep. My DS is also behind on speech, we moved nurseries to one that was run by teachers and more school prep focused and he is doing much better here.

I work in early years and find that children who attend 2 different settings are unsettled. They have 2 different sets of friends, different teachers and also different routines , it’s confusing for them and can be overwhelming at times.

id try to keep them at one centre.

Upset at drop off at both sometimes and sometimes fine at both it’s random
no there’s no wrap around unfortunately and childminders here are few and far between and all full