Does anyone else find tv sex and/or porn repulsive?

[Wildviolet]

Is it just me which fast forwards or mutes and looks away for tv sex scenes?

This being so, obviously porn is not my thing either.

I long for the days when sex, if an essential part of the plot, was just implied without all the heaving and pumping.

I don’t find it in the least sexy, more cringe worthy.

back in the day there was nexus books series, and nancy friday books etc it seems even in books it was popular

because i think some people do want to see it, generally if its a buff male and gets the women or some men omg about it etc (i know thats not all women / men etc

Books are a bit different I think - easier to just skim over the scenes if you like, and as long as the writing isn't utterly dire, it's more likely to be tastefully titillating to a wider audience. Probably because it's not actual people who you know are just pretending to like it writhing about awkwardly, but fictional figments of the imagination.

some of those book series were pritty much pure adult entertainment so to speak the nancy friday ones are all various fantasies people have etc

There was a 10 year period that only just ended where women appeared in films/series having a piss. Just lije sitting there on the toilet empting their bladder and looking sad 😂 that bothered me way more than sex scenes

back in the 50,s etc various books also black lace series were the old day version of our modern internet porn etc

Still, as I said, it's not real people in your face - it's whatever you imagine to go with the words! I think explicitly smutty content is less 'confronting' and has much broader appeal when it's written, because of that aspect.

Not even mentioning porn - incomparable as an industry.

I worked in film for a good many years and have been on set for sex scenes. It's probably not as awkward as you imagine it is. Usually set is cleared of all but essential people and there is so much chat/hair and make up touch ups/notes/sound checks/light tweaking etc in between takes and whatnot, that the sexy bits are almost the shortest part of the shoot. Everyone works very hard to ensure cast are comfortable, at ease and within the limits of what they are happy doing.

Having said all that, I STILL don't understand the amount of actual on-screen sex deemed 'essential' to move the plot forward/explain the character. The old adage 'sex sells' seems dated and unlikely given how cringe most people find it - also given how easy it is to access porn or erotica, it is no longer a novelty that you can't find anywhere else as it would have been in the earlier days of cinema.

I'm trying to think of a single film where the very act of the sex improved my understanding of the character or storyline. There are definitely films where the 'kind' of sex was important - especially if the sexual relationship was the heart of the story - but even that can be implied with a few carefully shot frames that don't require all the slopping, squelching and thrusting.

I honestly don't know who it is for.

I think Bridgerton level is fine

only show i can think of was game of thones but then thats more to show how omg the characters were

OP , I'm with you I can't stand sex on tv and I fast forward it if I can. For me it doesn't add anything to the plot and as you mentioned it use to be implied rather than shoved in your face & it was better that way. I don't watch porn either, I never have, just the thought of it gives me the ick. Thankfully my DH doesn't like it either!
This doesn't mean I'm a frigid old prude, far from it I have a very active, happy, healthy sex life with my DH even at our ages! I just don't want to see others at it.

As someone else said, all the talk of moving the story along or underatnading a character is a justification rather than a reason.

I'll be honest, I don't watch anyone having sex in real life. That doesn't mean I don't know my friends or understand what's going on in their lives because I haven't watched them having sex or seen what type of sex they have. I managed to follow the storyline of films without sex just fine!

I'm.not sure how anyone would understand a character better by having seen her in the shower, having sex or being raped. Surely, if that were the case, we'd also see male characters just randomly naked and having sex, being raped or even just showering at the same levels.

Given that we generally don't, I think it's safe to assume that it's got very little to do with understanding characters and plot development and that it's largely there for the entertainment of men 🤷🏻‍♀️

Why? Is it a turn on for you?

When you think about it, it is completely unnecessary.

Especially when they put 'unnecessary' rape scenes in. I look up the films content before I watch anything and the number of films that feature rape is incredible. Everything from gang rape, to rape, to rape 'off screen but you can hear the woman screaming', to 'man threatens to rape woman' too 'men discuss raping a woman'.

Where rape isn't a central theme of the plot but it just seems to be showhorned in for what reason?

At this point, I can only assume that men who make films enjoy imagining rape scenarios and that this is reflected in the interests of the male audience.

I mean, why else would it be there?

I think mainly it's not very sexy. The American telly with all the bouncy sex that doesn't look enjoyable at all. It looks like a punishing spin class.

The problem with filmed sex is that it is necessarily all about what it looks like, but real sex is about feelings and bodies; you look ridiculous quite a lot, but you don't care at all because sex isn't a performance, it's an experience: it's feeling together.

Depends really. I think that you couldn’t really do Bridgerton without the sex - it’s a core part of the novels, which are highly successful. Sounds as if you wouldn’t be a fan of the sex in the novels, so it’s not really for you. It’s basically erotica for a largely female audience, but it’s not claiming to appeal to every woman and it’s totally ok if that’s not for you. I don’t feel sorry for the actors - they signed up knowing exactly what type of project they were involved in and it hasn’t hurt their careers to do it - Jonathan Bailey wouldn’t have got Wicked or Jurassic Park as a porn actor.

In other places, I do find it gratuitous, because it’s not really the point of the story. And very unrealistic - against walls, instant climax etc etc. I think it’s also unfair to ambush people with random sex that isn’t really trailed.

By way of example, I think it’s very clear from the trailers and reviews what sort of sex people are having in wuthering heights and that it doesn’t really appeal to me, so I’m not that bothered about seeing it. I’m happy if it appeals to others though!

We live in a fragmented broadcasting world, so things are made for different audiences - if it’s clear in advance what you are watching and can find enough of what appeals to you, I can’t really see the issue.

There was a sex scene in The Residence that was a plot point - and did move the story along and was in character for both participants - kept clothes on I think was short and ended with a nose bleed.

So I wouldn't say they were never needed just they are massively over used or used badly.

It depends if its just me and my partner is fine and a turn on. If the family is there its just awkward as fuck

she was good in revenge show

Quite similar to real sex then really.

The porn acting in Love Actually at least was showing the sheer boredom behind the industry. Although both characters were clearly too nice, pleasant and respectful. Not broken, afraid or numb.

Game of Thornes was interesting because it did show sex and rape used throughout history as part of war, politics and power, always to the detriment of women. It just got a bit voyour and a bit too much like it was a format beat every 28 minutes.

I'm very nervous about teens seeing this stuff and it becoming part of their personal wank bank. There's going to be so much to unpack for future generations.

My reaction is not as strong as yours but I do find it completely unnecessary- I much prefer the ‘fade to black’ or ‘door closes behind them’ scenario to full on nudity and grunting. Plus it’s embarrassing to watch with other people, I don’t know anyone who enjoys it.

I do find it irritating when its something I could otherwise have watched with my DDs - so we don't watch Bridgerton together as it would be a bit cringe.

It was really annoying when Philippa Gregory's White Princess was on as DDs were quite a bit younger - it would have been a lovely story without all the sex scenes - I know she puts them in her novels but that is something you read in private and, again, not something to watch en famille.

I’m not repulsed by it I think that’s quite a strong emotion to have about it, but I don’t see the point of sex scenes in films and shows just get on with the story line. Porn doesn’t repulse me either but I don’t especially like it I don’t watch it it’s the least sexy thing I’ve ever seen. Not to mention the exploitation and abuse which goes on in the industry

70-80% of Bridgerton's audience is women/girls. It's enormously popular and I've seen a fair bit of complaining that there was less sex than in earlier seasons. Some women want to watch sexy stuff too - it's a show made by a woman, aimed squarely at (and very popular with) women. Ditto the likes of e.g. Heated Rivalry, the recent stratospheric rise of explicit novels, etc- aimed heavily at women.

While I appreciate that it's not for everybody, I do think we need to be careful about assuming that only men like sexually explicit or titillating content. That's just not the case and it entrenches the oddly-pervasive view that men are interested in sex / women just tolerate the concept of it, men get horny and think about sexual stuff in general / women think it's unnecessary, etc etc. It robs women of sexual agency and reinforces ideas of women being pure, sexless beings that are hounded by horrid men - you see a lot of that on here and I think it's damaging.

Obviously it's fine if you don't like this kind of content - clearly, from this thread, lots of people don't! But it's not being forced upon women and it's reductive and incorrect to say it is.