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Sister and sil fallen out

66 replies

WhyWomen26 · 14/02/2026 19:29

sister got married and our sil that lives other end of the country came up for the wedding with our younger brother
they have no kids yet not married yet but recently engaged, been together ten years already and both have a busy social and work life , high paying jobs and lifestyle etc
(not sure that’s relevant but thought a bit of background)
we don’t see them that often but thought nice enough

now here’s why my sister is really upset as sil wore a long white all in one suit to her wedding and was in the photos obviously

I don’t know what to think myself
I always thought never wear white to a wedding anyway but it was a suit kinda style
I can see why it was taken badly and family are talking about her now

but just wondering what others think about the white at a wedding??
I think it’s a bit of a no and it’s a shame my sister’s upset about it
but I won’t be falling out with sil I’m not thinking it was cruel intentions just maybe thoughtless or it’s just her style and it’s probably normal in the social groups she moves in

im trying to make my sister feel better by saying this but just wondering what others people think too?

I’ve added a photo of said suit it’s not the exact but sort of similar and was probably a very expensive piece of attire and I’m not saying I don’t like it because I do! Just not sure it’s wedding occasion

Sister and sil fallen out
OP posts:
WhyWomen26 · 14/02/2026 19:30

Image awaiting review!

OP posts:
TheMorgenmuffel · 14/02/2026 19:31

Yes, that's very much not considered ok

Suggest to your sister she gets the photos edited to change the sil outfit colour.

CharSiu · 14/02/2026 19:31

Though it’s a trouser suit it is very bridal.

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Moltenpink · 14/02/2026 19:31

Not worth falling out over, unless she has form

RapunzelHadExtensions · 14/02/2026 19:32

Your poll is kind of hard to understand but yeah you can't be wearing white to a wedding, everyone knows that.

EvangelineTheNightStar · 14/02/2026 19:33

TheMorgenmuffel · 14/02/2026 19:31

Yes, that's very much not considered ok

Suggest to your sister she gets the photos edited to change the sil outfit colour.

oooo good skills!!

WhyWomen26 · 14/02/2026 19:33

Moltenpink · 14/02/2026 19:31

Not worth falling out over, unless she has form

No not really
which is why I’m trying to keep peace
I really don’t think it was a bad intention
maybe just a bit thoughtless if anything

OP posts:
PlattyCat · 14/02/2026 19:33

In any other colours perfectly fine. Pure white with the wide leg it's a no. At a wedding your eye is always drawn to the one in white. Does she have form for this type of behaviour?

Fishingboatbobbingnight · 14/02/2026 19:33

What has your SIL said ?

Daytimetellyqueen · 14/02/2026 19:34

Very bridal! I’m not surprised your sister is upset but other than causing a massive family fall out, she needs to focus on the great day she had & ignore SIL!

TheMorgenmuffel · 14/02/2026 19:34

WhyWomen26 · 14/02/2026 19:33

No not really
which is why I’m trying to keep peace
I really don’t think it was a bad intention
maybe just a bit thoughtless if anything

Are you sure?
Don't wear white or anything that looks bride or bridal party-ish is such common knowledge that it feels like a choice to disregard it.

WhyWomen26 · 14/02/2026 19:35

PlattyCat · 14/02/2026 19:33

In any other colours perfectly fine. Pure white with the wide leg it's a no. At a wedding your eye is always drawn to the one in white. Does she have form for this type of behaviour?

we hardly see her
so no idea
always thought she was ok
yes agree any other colour….

OP posts:
WhyWomen26 · 14/02/2026 19:36

TheMorgenmuffel · 14/02/2026 19:34

Are you sure?
Don't wear white or anything that looks bride or bridal party-ish is such common knowledge that it feels like a choice to disregard it.

It does seem strange I agree but I just feel like it’s not a purpose thing of her to upset my sister
I can’t say why I just feel like it was more accidental like not really thinking

OP posts:
MigGirl · 14/02/2026 19:37

TheMorgenmuffel · 14/02/2026 19:31

Yes, that's very much not considered ok

Suggest to your sister she gets the photos edited to change the sil outfit colour.

I like this idea, preferably into a colour that doesn't suit her.

That's a big no, no for a wedding. I had cream suite once and even I chose a different coloured dress rather then wear that to a wedding.

Bringyourfoldingchair · 14/02/2026 19:37

Yeh, that’s a no no. And I don’t believe that it wouldn’t have even crossed sil that it might be inappropriate. No point you falling out with her too, but just be careful when trying to keep the peace. I think your sister is within her rights to be upset and you don’t want to end up looking unsupportive.

Okiedokie123 · 14/02/2026 19:41

Was that recently in the UK? I think thats an odd choice of colour for a guest to wear to an event in the UK at this time of year? Even weirder to a wedding.
She could have chosen that outfit in literally any other colour, looked gorgeous and offended no one. Im not surprised your sister is upset.

Furlane · 14/02/2026 19:42

It’s happened now, you can’t really do anything. Do people really look at their wedding photos enough to bother with photo editing to the extent of colouring someone’s outfit another colour? I have seen a few people wear similar outfits to weddings and some haven’t batted an eyelid (as you’re right, it is more common in some circles), and others I heard a few people making disparaging comments at the beginning, but it’s all been forgotten after an hour or so - I don’t think people notice that much if it’s a fun wedding, too busy enjoying themselves.

I’d try and reframe it as a bit of a funny story if she’s still that upset.

holycrapballs · 14/02/2026 19:44

If I saw someone wearing that at a wedding I would definitely think it was deliberate and they were a bit mad or had beef with the couple.

Maybe it was just really thoughtless or a bit dim but I can eee what your sister is pissed off.

Has anyone asked the SIL what her thoughts were?

Thattimenow · 14/02/2026 19:48

WhyWomen26 · 14/02/2026 19:35

we hardly see her
so no idea
always thought she was ok
yes agree any other colour….

Hardly see her?

so really this is no big deal

even if they do “fall out”

Getthetea · 14/02/2026 20:01

It’s thoughtless and inappropriate but not worth falling out over. Probably needs to be overlooked.

SuperSharpShooter · 14/02/2026 20:10

MigGirl · 14/02/2026 19:37

I like this idea, preferably into a colour that doesn't suit her.

That's a big no, no for a wedding. I had cream suite once and even I chose a different coloured dress rather then wear that to a wedding.

Hahaj, yes this.
Something that really drains her.
Don't say anything, just get the pictures done amd send some copies to SIL 😆
Everyone knows you don't wear white to a wedding!
I'd wear that as a bride of I got married again.
Bad form from SIL

TheMorgenmuffel · 14/02/2026 20:15

WhyWomen26 · 14/02/2026 19:36

It does seem strange I agree but I just feel like it’s not a purpose thing of her to upset my sister
I can’t say why I just feel like it was more accidental like not really thinking

No woman "just doesnt think" about her choice of outfit for a wedding.
People put a lot of thought into what they will wear for special occasions.

That outfit was a choice.

Nearly50omg · 14/02/2026 20:18

The girlfriend - she’s not a sil
until they are married! - of the brother is an attention seeking cow! I’d either get the photographer to take the woman out of every single photo or change her outfit to a different colour

Madeofelm · 14/02/2026 20:19

Is everyone from the same country/culture?

Vitrolinsanity · 14/02/2026 20:23

flipping heck, unless she wore a long navy coat over it, that’s what not to wear to a wedding at any speed

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