What would make you want to go to a church event (or what makes you not want to go?)

[elliejjtiny]

Either Sunday services, special ones like carol services or social events.

I'm just wondering as our church numbers are dwindling at the moment as a few of the elderly people have died recently, a couple of families have left and nobody new has come for years.

We used to get quite a few people come for our carol service and for the family fun day (barbeque, games and a bouncy castle) but now hardly anyone comes to those things either.

We've got a facebook page which gets lots of views. I'm just wondering if there was anything we could be doing differently. It's a bit depressing when you organise an event and hardly anyone comes.

Not the same place, but truly awe inspiring in a place of worship. Literally breathtaking.

That's not a bad idea for a service that would get people in who might not be part of your usual congregation.
The crowds James B Partridge is pulling in with his nostalgic rekindling or "schools we sang at Primary School" could be recreated in most Churches I'd have thought. In the same way people turn up for Carol services - it is like 'comfort food'.

Depends on the individual Church and individual Preacher and/or Service Leader.

I think this is a really valid point, and some of the more welcoming churches where I live have created 'safe spaces' so choirs, or bible groups or just meet up/hobby groups specifically for lgbtqa+ individuals who want to attend but are worried about how they might be received amongst a wider church population.

To be honest, I think these are the posts that really highlight the double standard that exists around Christianity in particular but also religion in general being 'judgemental' or disdainful when in reality atheists can be just as judgemental and disrespectful. And somehow that's fine and acceptable.

I also have a massive issue with wealth hoarding in the church. I also am able to see that this isn't ALL churches, ALL Christians or ALL religion so I'm not going to disrespect an entire group of peoples belief system and conflate the two.

Well said. As I said earlier, I'm agnostic, and dislike all organised religion, but am almost always impressed by and like individual members of the clergy, and I speak to them respectfully, as they speak to me.
And talking about invisible sky wizards/sky fairies/imaginary friends etc just makes people look like adolescents or students being silly.

I once heard a C of E vicar say that he'd been trained that the service should be about God and about 59 minutes.

Edit to add that from somewhere I've heard that a sermon should be 'about God and about 4 minutes' on the premise that if you haven't said what you want to say in 4 minutes you're on a loser, mate, because they've stopped listening.

Thank you. I talked to the clergy and they liked some of the ideas. They seem determined that the bouncy castle at the fun day isn't necessary which I don't agree with and they think we should have party games/team games instead. Which I don't think will work because we will have no idea how many children will come and what ages.

In the last couple of years we have had mainly secondary school aged children come with a few younger siblings and then a couple of under 5's. The children from the church are all aged 10 and older and it's mostly their friends who come to the fun day. We have the vicarage garden open which has a trampoline and climbing frame/swing. Which is why some people think there is no need for a bouncy castle. But I find when we have had a bouncy castle it has been hugely popular and we can always hire an inflatable slide, obstacle course or one of those inflatable things with a surfboard or ride on thing that moves and you have to try and stay on it if we want something that's really different from the trampoline. When we have had the bouncy castle it has been constantly in use. Even before and after the fun day when we were setting up/cleaning up the children of the helpers were playing on it.

The only problem with the bouncy castle is that for 2 years in a row the company cancelled on us at the last minute, 1 year because it was raining (fair enough and we had the whole fun day indoors that year) and one time when they said it was going to be windy, although the wind forecast was much lower than they said it would be and the actual day was glorious sunshine. But I have found a different company that comes highly recommended so we shouldn't have that problem again.

what do you think? And do you have any other ideas that teenagers would like? I will admit I am biased towards bouncy castles because my dc love them and they actually go to bed without fuss after being on one all day which is unheard of for them. Some of the people from church have suggested things like giant connect 4, garden jenga etc but I think that would appeal more to younger children than teenagers.

Goodness, what about ‘Love them that don’t tidy up after themselves’.

They need to accept that more people and usage will mean more wear and tear.

Are you absolutely sure that usage of the vicarage garden and domestic play equipment would be covered under your event insurance?

A decent creche, special events eg harvest festival, hymns I know (eg primary school classics are always on mothering Sunday), fireworks in vicarage garden, junior choir performance, opportunities for kids to do readings or prayer, Sunday school with lovely teacher. I’m keen to try messy church too

Good advice.

Make sure people feel welcome, cared about, not an inconvenience, not potential converts, (IE welcome even if they have no interest in converting right now/at all) not asked for money. They are people first. Not potential Sunday school teachers.

I'm disabled and have disabled children. At some places we are seen as a problem to solve, an inconvenience, ignored by most, despite a few people trying, if the majority outnumber those that try, especially the leaders who couldn't care less if you came, don't offer any support, (such as a place you can see, or a space where kids are less of a worry) then a few who try don't make much difference. Don't do token inclusion.

Community. If you are looking after your own congregation, they are going to tell others how good they are at caring etc. my friend moved church and I want to follow her as they sound so good. A community that care for each other and will include new comers in the same way.

Don't have an us and them culture. There will be people who are more in the know, leaders, more involved, but try to include everyone and make everyone feel important and having something to offer. (Ideas, opinions etc)

A structure that will include everyone. Don't set it up in a way that only couples can participate fully, or only those who are home in the day, or only those without children, or only those with plenty of disposable income, or only the able bodied. Eg small groups don't all happen at the same day/time.

Don't gossip about people.

Not cliquey. No set pews or seats unless for disability reasons. Don't stick those who can't stand at the back where they can't see the screen.

Don't have favourites. It's obvious who they are if you do. Don't use the same people as examples. Use generic examples, or anonymised examples.

Lots of social activities of various types. Meals, (have enough for everyone, allergies, etc) quizzes, walks, games nights, crafts, etc. Things you can bring friends to without having to commit to the whole God thing.

Explain what is going on or how you do communion, or which page you are on, etc.

Have photos and clear times, dates, service structure and expectations (Sunday best or casual?) on the website so people can check it out first. Good signage. Accessible building, well lit, but not too bright not too loud but loud enough to hear etc.

I know, it's like they want loads of people to come as long as they don't drink tea or use the toilet.