What helps you enjoy your life?

[CapitanSandy]

Just that really.

After an incredibly tough 2 years and a few months experiencing burnout I woke up this morning with the feeling that I really want to start enjoying my life again. I’m mid 30’s with no DC.

I also want to retrain and study again but I’m not sure if I’m ready.

What helps you?

My cat and chocolate. And cake. That’s it really.

The gym, getting steps in, getting up early.

reading good books, the occasional indulgence of a few glasses of wine.

spending time doing my hair and minimal makeup

I like having a little obsession going, but I am probably on the spectrum! I get really into a topic and research all about it, podcasts, tv programs etc. It's titanic at the moment.

I also love exercise and cooking tasty /healthy foods 😍

Being grateful for all the lovely things I do have. My commute to work is a walk along a gorgeous river for example, which I’m so grateful for. My children are happy and thriving. I can afford an occasional facial and massage which I love. Etc etc

the things I like are mostly free. I walk, I swim, I chat and lie on the sofa watching a movie with my girls.

and anything I don’t have, it’s down to choices I’ve made so I’m happy with that too. I don’t have the money to go to the Maldives for example, but that’s because I’d rather work less hours in an unstressful job fit example, so I don’t want to change that anyway.

and I know people get upset when I say this, as if I’m passing judgement on their relationship, but I love being single. It works for me, the peace, the lack of negativity.

I need to exercise
and get outside and feel the weather
and o like learning things

I went through a really difficult time between 2021 and 2023 and ended up with PTSD and anxiety as a result. Recovery is an ongoing process and I try to focus on short term and smaller things to make me happy while keeping an eye on the future.

In real terms, I give myself little treats sometimes. A Lego set, a binge watch of a loved tv programme, a bunch of flowers for myself. I love to be at home with my family, in particular my dog! I also try to walk to work most of the time (weather permitting) and keep my daily routines as simple as I can to not feel overwhelmed where I don’t need to.

A good sense of self-awareness.

Knowing when I've booked enough social stuff in and a rest day is needed.

Knowing that when everything feels terrible that my period is likely due and I'll feel completely different in a couple of days.

Knowing that sometimes not wanting to do something is anxiety rather than a genuine dislike of the thing and I should do it anyway.

Knowing when I need to sleep and eat.

Knowing that negative emotions (sadness, loneliness, jealousy) are all part of a normal human experience, it's ok to feel them and move through.

And so on.

I like walking up hills and swimming in the sea ... ideally with a friend.
At your age I loved sex and romance too, but that's just a happy memory now. So 'gather ye rosebuds while ye may'.

DDog!

I love things to look forward to. Am in London with my daughter today watching a show. But cheaper things like going to the cinema (£5 on a Monday) or meeting a friend for coffee out are also great.

Gardening
Being outside
Reading/audiobooks
Cooking or baking something nice
Time with people I love

Eating as healthily as possible most of the time. Reading, binge-watching a good series and Tunnocks teacakes!

Doing a job I enjoy which brings in just enough to have a little surplus, rather than a stressful job I hate (currently working on implementing this one), as much time as possible in nature, whatever the weather as it makes home feel cosier and earned. For the last 6 months, it’s also been weight lifting (often outdoors on my patio in all weathers). It’s been transformative, makes me feel I’m doing something useful for the future and for the first time in ages, I’m starting to like my body. Also, enjoying cooking and baking, rather than buying so much ready made stuff (this fits hand-in-hand with taking a less stressful job). Filling my life with low stress, not too much social (I’m a massive introvert and love my own space), reading and watching films as Winter is supposed to bring down time. As the weather improves, it’ll be growing stuff from seed, gardening, different walks, camping and music - live, gigs, festivals, music in the garden with a BBQ.

I’m like this too. I have autism. I go through cycles of being super into something and then it switches to something else. It’s been the Second World War, titanic, serial killers, learning how to decorate, cruises (watching vlogs on them and learning all about the different cruise lines) and now Disneyland - even though I don’t really want to go to Orlando I watch endless vlogs about it and it’s like I have to know everything there is to know. It’s very relaxing.

I’m still in the thick of my tough year, with no end in sight yet so for me it’s appreciate the small things - for me that’s books, coffee in the garden, a walk with the dogs.
Fitness would probably help too but I wouldn’t know about that….
For the future, I plan things I’ll do when I can, but still fairly simple things that’s are do-able but will add value. For me that’s getting back into netball and perhaps horse-riding if money allows. I have a list of UK places I’d like to spend a weekend pottering about in too.

With regards to study, could you pick a short adult education thing and see how you get on with that - it might help you decide if you’re ready for something more challenging?

Oooh great question op!

Its dead dead simple for me.

audiobooks, podcasts, a bath.

Washing on the line in the sun, my fresh cut grass.

Fantastic telly like Schitts creek, Yellow stone, Peaky blinders, Killing Eve.

My friends, a very carefully selected and collected group of remarkable, wise, intelligent and funny women.

Hugs from my youngest child, when he says “mummy”. When my eldest perches on the end of my bed in the evening to open up, talk to me and tell me his thoughts.

The best is around 6pm on a week day evening, when everyone is home from school & work, safe, under the roof of their home. Where they should be with us. Relaxed, happy, warm and content.

I am very lucky.

Peace is very important to me and makes me happy. I know that if I prioritise my mental and physical health, I feel peaceful and this balances me out. To maintain this I walk a lot, go to the gym or swim, meet friends for coffee, meditate, spend time with my grown up daughters and lovely little grandchildren.
I am also trying to be ‘selfish’ and say no to commitments or demands on my time that I don’t want to give - that’s hard to do and I’m not always successful.
I have a full on job, and lots of responsibility which can be overwhelming at times and I can make a martyr of myself if I don’t have boundaries. I’m late 40’s and it’s taken me this long to get here so it’s a learned experience!

Caring less about insignificant stuff. Exercise. Eating wholesome and nutritious food (I include freshly baked cakes in this ). Spending time with friends even when sometimes it feels like I just want to stay home. I always feel better after it. Baths!

I volunteer.

Ive also set up a craft group in our local library & we all love it and meet very interesting people.

Hobbies - art & knitting/crochet & mindless scrolling on Pinterest :) For more hobbies, photos of beautiful places to visit. Animal antics make me laugh the most.

Making lists. Keeping a diary. Daily Wordle. Toast. Coffee. Supermarket shopping for nice things. Having a lovely family. No dramas. Doing what I like when I like.

Getting twats put your life highly helps
Pets
Nature
Travel
Fun
Adventure

Enjoying the small things

I usually focus on things that make me happy and try not to worry about what anyone else is doing. Keeping life simple, doing what I enjoy, and not overthinking things makes a big difference. Travelling when I can, spending time with my family, hanging out with my cats, and enjoying the simple stuff in life.

Sorry you have had such a rough time, OP. I do hope things get better for you soon. I think it is great you are thinking about things that might help you enjoy life more.

Obviously different people enjoy different things but the things I love that make me happy:

Spending time with friends - preferably over a good meal as that combines my love of socialising with my love of food
Dancing - I have been going to daytime raves and enjoy it so much I am buzzing for days!
Going to the theatre - absolutely love going to watch plays
Reading - I try to read a little every day, and am ruthless about stopping a novel if I am not enjoying it
Watching comedy - preferably live, but there are some good shows and sitcoms out there too.

I should say that I think exercise is really important for mental and physical health, but I hate it and have to force myself to do it. It is worth doing it, though.

Yoga
Audio books
Cinema (rare that I can go)
Cats

Theatre also