What helps you enjoy your life?

[CapitanSandy]

Just that really.

After an incredibly tough 2 years and a few months experiencing burnout I woke up this morning with the feeling that I really want to start enjoying my life again. I’m mid 30’s with no DC.

I also want to retrain and study again but I’m not sure if I’m ready.

What helps you?

My choir.
Watching my favourite programmes. Podcasts. My dog. Peace & silence. Occasional nights out where I might drink too much. A great book.
sleeping late

My dog
Endless cups of tea and coffee
Long lie ins
Exercising and being healthy
Seeing family and friends
Binging a boxset
A nice walk
Clean house and candles lit
Pub with friends
My lovely mum and family
Cosy new pjs
Curling up with my partner
Good music
Rain on the window when you're in bed
Sunbathing on a beach and swimming in sea when abroad
Cooking and food shopping

Designer handbags
the colour pink
business or first class long haul flights
discovering new shops in new destinations
shallow yet true

My DW
Volunteering
My books
And my chosen genre of music.

My dogs
music
a good something to watch on tv
the woods

Being retired and living alone
Being able to get out and about whenever I want
Music, reading
Keeping life simple
Oh, and visits from my neighbour's cat now that all mine have gone

Cycling in a group.

Good coffee
Walking the dog on the beach everyday
Eating more healthy meals (loads more fresh fish)
Not having to work anymore

Supportive husband
Parkrun tourism
Early morning walks with my dog
Volunteering 1 night a week
Afternoon naps
Spending time with the kids (late teens and really fun to be around)
Outdoor swimming
Paddleboarding when it gets a bit warmer
Theatre trips
Catch up with friends

Am the first in my family to receive a cancer diagnosis and not die within six months of it. This alone has helped me see my life isn't so bad after all and enjoy everything it brings, even things I cannot determine that outcome of.

When I can't sleep, the fact my closest Gail's opens at 5:30am. Indeed, have just come back from there with a freshly baked pain au chocolat. A most enjoyable start to my day!

Writing a novel, socialising, spending time with DH, going out as a family or with DDs on my own, holidays, pets, gym, walking the dog, enjoying nature, day clubbing, gardening, reading, watching TV. Learn and grow all your life or you stagnate.

I love -

Tea and all things to do with tea such as tea pots, trying out nice tea, a new mug, the first cup of tea in the morning or after a long walk.

Meeting friends for a coffee or a meal.

Going to the theatre to see plays and musicals.

Creative writing and entering competitions, I get a lot of satisfaction if I win or am published in a literary magazine 📚

Walks in nature in all weathers.

Spending time with my children, my youngest’s joyful innocence and my oldests curiosity and intelligence.

Personal development-studying, learning new things, learning just for the love of learning.

Books in bed.

Ghost stories 👻

Fantasising about owning a couple of cats 🐈‍⬛ 🐈‍⬛ 😆

Travel and exploring new countries.

Spending time with my parents as I don’t know how much longer I will have them for 💕

Connecting with people, even I. Small ways, can really help.

Is there anything you need to change op? Many years back DH and I were both stressed and unhappy and thought something needed to change but we couldn't identify what that thing was - or jobs might have been the obvious choice but there were many benefits to keeping our jobs. Nevertheless, we were committed to finding a change. A year later we'd sold up and moved to an unknown area. Best decision ever.

That's a big thing, but so many small things are enjoyable to me. I wake up an hour before I need to get out of bed so that I can have a pot of tea in the calm and quiet. DH and I compete on crosswords, it's a lovely and gentle way to start the day.

Yoga every day
Switching from listening to the news to radio 3 especially in the evening
Dog walks
cutting out alcohol apart from an occasional vodka and tonic
Fresh air every day even if I am just in the garden for ten minutes

This is a great thread. I’m inspired.

Changing “I have to…” to “I get to…”

This morning I got to go to the gym and walk my dogs. I now get to go to work at a job I love with friendly colleagues. I’m meeting an old friend for lunch. Tonight I’ll get to cook fajitas with my son and catch up on the Night Manager.

Lots of people aren’t as lucky as me. They don’t get to do those small but wonderful things.

I'm in survival mode at the moment, but when I can:
Dancing
Reading in bed
Walks
Board games with the kids
Going out/staying in to see films with my partner
Libraries
UK weekends away to see new cities, museums etc.
I tend to find doing creative things very energising, so making sure life isn't just drudgery and I can do things that stimulate my imagination.
I need to learn to find more joy in household management- I'm working on that. Lovely inspiring thread!

Just reading the first line of the last comment ‘I’m in survival mode at the moment’ has reminded me of another thing that helps me.
just wait. Wait till tomorrow.
so by that I mean that some days are just rubbish or I’m stressed or whatever, but on those days I just think ‘don’t worry, get through today earning as much as possible, helping my financial pension and fitness pension, and tomorrow will be fun again.’

Love this!! ❤️

I am fortunate that I really enjoy my life and am very happy. Part of that is having a great DH and two lovely daughters of course but I do think a lot of it is mindset.

Having had a really tough few years I decided to reframe things and it has genuinely helped. I stopped going over and above at work....it was stressing me out, I didn't get any brownie points for it so now I just do what I need to do, do it well but no more. I choose to see it as something that benefits me in terms of my salary, my pension and using my brain but it has become de-centred in my life. My family, friends and home life are the most important things, not my work.

Small things that I enjoy are:

Having a really nice coffee first thing in the morning. It's a little ritual I look forward to.

Listening to audiobooks or podcasts. I go on a long walk with my audiobook in my ears and get my steps in without even noticing the time passing.

Finding exercise I enjoy. For me that has been yoga.... I used to do it from home online but then found a local class with a lovely bunch of women and I always, always feel better for having gone to my weekly yoga class.

Finding a hobby that means I'm off my phone and doing something mindful. I latch hook cushions and rugs because it's really easy to learn and I find it relaxing. I can put my audiobook on and easily lose an hour just focusing on that which has been much better for me than endless scrolling!

Baking my own bread. I made savoury muffins for DDs lunch boxes last night and it gives me a sense of accomplishment, I know exactly what's in them and we can eat the product of my work so it's win win 🤣.

Choosing a nice bottle of wine each week that I then enjoy to myself over Friday, Saturday and Sunday. It's my weekly treat and I enjoy picking different ones out to try.

Small acts of self-care. Having a simple skincare routine, putting on a bit of makeup in the morning, having a bath with really nice products, cooking a healthy recipe etc. Just viewing myself as someone that is important and worth taking care of.

Reading smut! I don't care that it's not high brow literary fiction. Give me a spicy romantasy novel with a good plot and I'm happy.

I suppose it depends on where you live and what you enjoy to begin with.
I work nearly full time (partly from home) and have two kids, one in primary and one in secondary school. I recently took a new job which, really, is a step down. But I enjoy it and the flexibility that comes with it.

I do various combinations of tennis, yoga, gym and/or park run - getting outside is key to my health, even if it's a walk round the block in the rain. Countryside or parks are better. I love a good coffee and time spent with and without friends - reading, walking, having a wine on a Friday.

As I've got older (now early 40s) I have got into saunas (which have popped up all over my city) and also, occasionally, a sound bath. We've got a(n old) camper van and our kids do lifesaving, so we plan weekends away around their fixtures.

None of this is super exciting - I think the key to contentment is finding it in small, everyday things.

Also, I wanted to re-train at 30, and thought I was too old then and never did. You'll never be younger than you are right now - seize the day! xx

Sex
Making art and being creative in general
Music
Learning new things - doesn't have to be formal, it can be as simple as reading about vestigial structures on Wikipedia or a podcast about old Hollywood
Being around family and animals

Also, a pack of Marlboro lights 😬

Oh yes - we also got a cat (a regular moggy), who brings company and cuddles, whilst not needing to come everywhere with us. Can recommend a cat.

Exercise. Lifting weights and cardio, first thing and every day. Eating properly. Not just the quality of food but enough food. No alcohol.

When I don’t exercise and eat badly I feel like garbage.

Cuddling with my cat.
Going for walks, especially in the woods, countryside.
Cooking or baking something nice whilst listening to a good, well-narrated story on YouTube or Audible.
Finding and discovering good comedies/series/films for the past - especially ones I haven’t seen before.
Having a candlelit bath with lovely bath salts or bubble bath.
Good theatre.
Listening to a playlist of my favourite 80s and early 90s tracks and dancing in the kitchen.
Watching a funny DVD whilst colouring, doodling or sewing.