My car died and I’m devastated - hand hold please

[whyyyyyisitmonddayy]

I’m being so ridiculous but keep in mind I’ve got a really bad kidney infection so I’m in a lot of pain. I can hardly walk.

My car died. Clutch went. It was a landrover nearing 20, had a name (from previous owner - on paperwork) and it was falling apart. It was my first car and gifted to me by my mum who had it for six years. She was a tricky thing to drive but she took me everywhere.

she was my freedom. I’m 21 and a student. I’d gone car camping in her. I did delivery driving from her. Saved my ass while hydroplaning, going through flood water, etc. I spent 100s of hours behind the Wheel. Getting drive through food by myself and parking up for some quiet. I’d repaired her road size and put away money to repair her failing turbo (her clutch went first and it was far too expensive to fix). I’d gone on holiday in her, slept in the back, she dropped my bags of for other holidays. Hell, she even dropped me off at school, at college, at uni…

I defended her when my boyfriend rightly told me she was a hunk of junk who needed to be scraped. She did. But I still cried when she broke down after her torque went.

im lucky enough im able to get another car but nothing is catching my eye. My life is falling apart and im barely holding it together already. And now my sweet old car is gone. it’s silly, but I loved the way she felt to drive. Terrible MPG though. I took such good care of her too.

Fairly distasteful thread title really.

But I feel for you and hope you find a suitable car soon.

How on earth is it “distasteful”? It’s completely unusable. The gearbox is literally “dead”

Oh behave

No, I get you completely OP.
I've had many a car, and waved them all off without a backward glance.
A few years ago, I got my first campervan. She took me everywhere, kept going through the worst of weather's and trickiest of terrains. Was my escape when DH died and thongs got too much.
And then she was written off.
I can't believe how upsetting it was😅
I have a newer, shinier Motorhome now, but still mourn my reliable old girl.
You'll get over it, but will never forget 😘

Don’t be ridiculous. It’s quite common to refer to a car as s/he and in no way deranged.

I feel upset when I have to move on from a car. We get attached to them!
( I actually name ours too)

All my cars have names. At the moment we have:

Maud the Merc (mine)
Julie the Jag (shared between me and OH)
Pat the Polestar (DDs dad's car)
Erica the Escort (classic to be done up)
Vera the Van (another classic to be done up)
Rita the Rover (mine)
Bertha the BMW (OHs)

When my Mini Cooper (Maureen) was sold on I cried - she was the first car I'd ever bought because I wanted to, rather than just buying another shitter to get me through a year)

@whyyyyyisitmonddayy I understand your pain, you'll find another car soon

I presumed you'd misspelled cat. Weird thread

I'm very sorry about your car and your kidney infection - do you have a fever?
But I thought your thread was a misspelling of cat. Your car wasn't a she, it was a machine. And it didn't drop you off at school, you drove yourself there. Sorry to be harsh but you'll be fine. You'll find another car - you can afford one and you're already looking

This feels bigger than it is because your emotions are generally all over the place at the moment. Realistically you're really disappointed because you enjoyed that car and weren't expecting it to need replacing yet. Your emotions will catch up soon, in the mean time remind yourself with sensible words that it is just a car. If you catastrophise your body can't tell the difference and it makes you feel.more stressed and it gets harder to cope. You'll enjoy remembering this car forever, focus on that.

I get you OP. I've had cars that I've been really attached to but have sadly totally died. However, you're young and there will be many cars in your future, some you will be more attached to than others

Im sorry. I know how you feel. We had a 1960 triumph herald when I was younger. My dad bought in from new. My mum drove us to school in it. We all learnt to drive in it. I drove it through sixth form and university. Slept in it at parties. I learnt how to fix it with a Haynes manual and my dad on the end of the phone. We were all really sad when it finally conked out 29 years later. Me and my brothers still talk about it very fondly and we are all in our 60's. It was such a big part of our lives growing up. Sometimes things are just special.

If you’ve never loved an old Land Rover, you’ve never lived. I remember when my Dad lost one of his he’d owed from new and had about 20 years, I remember picking it up from the dealer as a child.

Are you sure it’s not fixable?

I loved my previous car and have its number plate sitting on my shelf 🥹

Thread title is grim imo.

Massive sympathies from me OP. I love my ancient Smart Car and will be devastated when he finally goes to the garage in the sky. He’s got a name and I always say hello and goodbye to him whenever we go out. He takes me on camping trips and outings and just looking at him makes me smile.

Cars now are so ugly and devoid of any personality.

Good luck with finding a replacement. You can give it a name and start a whole new adventure.

I know we all remember our first car and am sure you’re meaning to be lighthearted but I think you’ll find other posts on Mumsnet posted today that use the same language you’ve used in your title which are about death, devastation and loss of more than just a car so your post, possibly unfairly, is not going to land that well. Perhaps that’s the intention?

I hope you get over your kidney infection and get well soon but I’m not going to hold your hand over a car.

No chance you can save your pennies to fix it? (Or fix it yourself..?)

Yes totally agree with this. It’s natural to be disappointed when your car is sent to the big scrap heap in the sky but you’d only had it four years and you can afford to buy another which is a luxury so many people would not be able to afford if it happened to them at this point in time. I had a 26 year old Disco before my current car, but I didn’t need a handhold when the time came. Hope your kidney stuff clears up soon, because that sounds rotten.

Then again don't like it when people say 'phone died' etc so prob just me!

Is there any reason you can’t get it fixed? Is it cost?

A clutch replacement will be cheaper than a turbo. Is it an old Defender? If so keep it, they are shooting up in value

Same here. Not helped by my BIL’d teasing.🤣

I wondered that and then wondered if I was projecting because my aunt died last week. She was definitely more important than any car and it’s thrown my family into a turmoil for a range of reasons. I think sometimes we just don’t think before we post.