What do you do that actually relaxes you

[OMGNeedtorelax]

I’ve name changed for this because combined with my other posts it’s quite identifying!

I’ve been to the GP this week because I’ve had a bad headache for a number of weeks now, combined with some nausea and fatigue. I have no quibble with how he treated me - spent ages doing all sorts of checks and listened to me when I explained I’m worried because I never get headaches. However, as I passed all his tests, he’s inclined to think it’s a tension headache lingering on.

I have a stressful job - I’m a teacher with extra responsibilities (I love it though - I’m in a lovely team and my headteacher is very supportive where she can be). I have thought about going down to four days but it would be quite a cut and I think I would just end up working on the fifth day anyway. Other than that though, my life is a charm - love my partner, life is good. We are facing some decisions over fertility at the moment having lost a baby last year. This is playing on my mind a lot, I admit.

I have high blood pressure and am working on my weight to get that down, as well as taking a low dose medication. My blood pressure was very high in the surgery but I have genuine white coat syndrome - I had photos of lower readings I had taken myself which placated the GP somewhat, although he’s asked me to do another week of submitting readings to review.

Anyway, my question is… what do you do that genuinely relaxes you? I feel like I’m in a constant state of fight or flight sometimes - always thinking about what needs to be done, what about the future, worrying about my health etc. I feel like I never switch off. I‘m sure I clench my jaw in my sleep! If my current health issue is just stress/tension related, I need to sort that out! But that feeling of ‘ok I MUST relax’ is stressing me out more! The only thing that I think genuinely relaxes me is a dog walk and an audio book in my headphones. I’ve tried yoga but I really couldn’t do the ‘clear your mind’ part!

Wine and fags here 🤣

Yoga
Walking
Doing online jigsaw
Yoga
Yoga
Did I say yoga? Would be top of the list, along with cuddling cats🐈

Reading books,a bit of Mn scrolling.
I've GAD and try not to think overnight about issues easier said than done

Online scrabble, walking in the country, guided meditation, swimming.

Having a bath
Going for a walk
Tidying up
Cooking
Decorating/fixing stuff
Crafting/mending
Wine & a log fire
Gym
Variety, mixing things up - I get stressed and bored doing the same things all the time.

1,000 piece jigsaw and, if my brain is in complete overdrive, some gentle TV I don't need to follow on in the background (escape to the country, four in a bed) and there is no chance for my mind to keep thinking about anything other than the pieces for a bit.

The doctor advised an eye test too so I’ve booked one. He said to go back in a couple of weeks if no improvement. I was a bit embarrassed to think I’ve felt so unwell and it could just be stress related.

So many good ideas, thank you! I really need to get off my phone too. I’ve remembered I used to like knitting, my partner has every games console going (or so it feels 😝) and I love the sound of a sound bath. Maybe I’ll give yoga a second chance too.

Yoga definitely, and relaxation exercises in bed. Also massaging my feet every night with Avon foot creme and a couple of drops of essential oil. I think if your job is the source of stress you have to look at that though, as nothing will help as much and changing that, sorry to say.

Watching with interest.
I'm also a teacher and find that it's incredibly hard to switch off -you're only ever hours away from needing to be in peak presenter-mode; it's relentless.
I have to be physically away from anywhere where I could feasibly be doing work in order to switch off, so walking in nature is my favourite. If I'm at the gym, I usually end up answering emails on the recumbent bike for 15 minutes, as my team are always hell-bent on communicating and I just need to get responding over with. So it's best to be literally on the move.

Walking the dogs and swimming (particularly in the sea).

Also being in bed with the dogs.

What games do people play? DP has an xbox but never really uses it, I sometimes play random games but never really get into anything - any recommendations?

I do walking, cleaning or simple batch cooking which involves a lot of chopping. Hot shower.
I have a cup of herbal tea or a drink (depending on the day) on my own at the end of the day watching film on my laptop, something light today it was Good ship murder. Or scrolling on MN but again keeping it light.

I can’t do yoga - all my problems are racing through my mind making me super stressed.
I also don’t find group activities helpful. To get relaxed I need less obligations, I need to know that no one wants anything from me.

@FoxIn25 My current games on console, I don’t play them all, all the time. Arc raiders, The Finals, Minecraft, Helldivers, Battlefield 6.

Look at gameplay online to see what you fancy.

The Finals is a very competitive PvP game, Minecraft is relaxing, I built a huge Japanese Temple with Gardens last year it took a couple of months.

Reading - I have relatively recently started back at a gym and I put a book on my kindle app in front of me of the cross trainer/treadmill/bike while I’m doing my half hour CV (before moving on to the weights) - I have music through my headphones and read while exercising - it’s a great way to pass the time for me! I’ve made myself a nice and happy playlist to have on my headphones which won’t distract me from reading, however I can easily not read and just listen to the music while exercising. It is helping me no end (I also have my head constantly filled with things I should be doing, but not actually actively doing them)

I also like a nap in front of the tv with a blanket over me and cuddling my dog - Midsomer Murders and other ‘comfort’ tv can be good for this.

also, cooking when I have the time to play with ingredients and different recipes like at a weekend - esp when I put some music on in the kitchen and I can just dance & sing without anyone around!

my dog is amazing but he’s quite old now and lazy so we don’t do long walks but just getting out for 20 mins in the fresh air is a great leveller too .

I crochet to relax and de stress, self taught thank you YouTube. I find it so therapeutic, it’s proven that having a crafting hobby does help.

Thought I was the only one who put on certain tv programs to nap to. Homes Under The Hammer sends me to sleep in seconds.😂

Yoga helps but I had to do it for a while before I was able to relax, it wasn’t instant relaxation from the first class. Prefer yoga classes, don’t switch off in the same way at home.

Walking in the woods works wonders for me.

Getting one room really clean and tidy and sitting under a blanket reading a book, sometimes with a YouTube crackling fire on the tv (a real one would be better but we don’t have one).

A long hot bath with spa music.

I’m a really bad sleeper and wake frequently through the night. Magnesium helps my body relax and stops the restless legs and a tea containing valerian and hops seems the most effective at helping my mind relax and helping me be able to go back to sleep in between wakings instead of lying there with my thoughts racing. Haven’t yet found a solution for the jaw clenching and now my gums are badly receding as a result.

Unfortunately I haven’t found anything that has lasting effects but I take the little pockets of relaxation where I can.

Bath, candles and music and a full body massage once a month, I have a pamper night during the week, after buying myself some lovely body stuff and face masks etc , nice big comfy bed.
oh and walking my dog in the woods and just getting out in daylight.

Definitely drop down to 4 days then ideally 3. The time and your health is more important than the money. Being in school full time is not conducive to good mental or physical health.

propranolol
game of thrones
read
cannabis oil
hot baths
lots of good sex or solo orgasms

I am also a teacher - currently acting up as a deputy head for the year . My BP been borderline - moderately high for a a few years and I finally went on medication this year . I changed it a month ago as it wasn’t quite right . The change is astonishing now that I am on a correct dose and type . Like you I love my job but it is demanding and stressful at times . I do sport every day ( tennis and padel ) and while that relaxes me , it still didn’t work as well as actually starting BP meds properly . So just check that out perhaps with a 24 hr monitor and see for sure . I feel much better on them . I also take a good dose of magnesium every night which also helps. Also was getting frequent tension / sinus headaches ( well what I thought were ) but they have no also gone since taking BP meds

Aromatherapy mister (for me with lavender & rose geranium) whilst reading or playing patience (solitaire) online.
pruning stuff in the garden.

Ex teacher here and I know what you mean about never switching off. The headaches could possibly be related to the clenched jaw - mine certainly were.

I find that the most relaxing thing is getting out into some green space for a walk. I feel myself physically unwind when I do that. I also swim three times a week which has been great for my mind and body. The ‘happy hormones’ after exercise are brilliant!

Box breathing (in for four, hold for four, out for four)
Singing - which I think is probably so relaxing because of the breathing, but making music is also good
Swimming (not wild swimming just a pool)
Occasionally sleeping apart from dp so that I sleep more deeply
Yoga (there’s a theme on this thread) - a friend runs a ‘calm yoga’ class that I like and also does day retreats which I’ve done a couple of times

Oh yes I also have a mouth guard from the dentist as I clench
Hot baths