What do you do that actually relaxes you

[OMGNeedtorelax]

I’ve name changed for this because combined with my other posts it’s quite identifying!

I’ve been to the GP this week because I’ve had a bad headache for a number of weeks now, combined with some nausea and fatigue. I have no quibble with how he treated me - spent ages doing all sorts of checks and listened to me when I explained I’m worried because I never get headaches. However, as I passed all his tests, he’s inclined to think it’s a tension headache lingering on.

I have a stressful job - I’m a teacher with extra responsibilities (I love it though - I’m in a lovely team and my headteacher is very supportive where she can be). I have thought about going down to four days but it would be quite a cut and I think I would just end up working on the fifth day anyway. Other than that though, my life is a charm - love my partner, life is good. We are facing some decisions over fertility at the moment having lost a baby last year. This is playing on my mind a lot, I admit.

I have high blood pressure and am working on my weight to get that down, as well as taking a low dose medication. My blood pressure was very high in the surgery but I have genuine white coat syndrome - I had photos of lower readings I had taken myself which placated the GP somewhat, although he’s asked me to do another week of submitting readings to review.

Anyway, my question is… what do you do that genuinely relaxes you? I feel like I’m in a constant state of fight or flight sometimes - always thinking about what needs to be done, what about the future, worrying about my health etc. I feel like I never switch off. I‘m sure I clench my jaw in my sleep! If my current health issue is just stress/tension related, I need to sort that out! But that feeling of ‘ok I MUST relax’ is stressing me out more! The only thing that I think genuinely relaxes me is a dog walk and an audio book in my headphones. I’ve tried yoga but I really couldn’t do the ‘clear your mind’ part!

I'm another sewer but soft furnishings, clothes, bags. Following instructions, just focusing on what I am doing in the moment.

Lie on the bed with a fluffy blanket on and ask Alexa to play spa music

Walks, especially in nature, turning my phone off and reading or listening to relaxing music.
Dropping my hours at work but you have said that isn't an option.

I love gaming to relax, especially cozy games, and yes I'm probably far too old!

Crochet or knitting. I do very basic stuff to relax where I don’t need to count and can just move.

Reading.

Comedy shows mass de-stress me.

I take proprananol. I used to get panic attacks and migraines, which sounds very similar to you and was related to hormonal changes around my period combined with peri-menopause shortening my cycle.

Non-medically I read and do dog walking to relax.

Face massage. I do 10 mins daily. Never realised I was anxious constantly until I started it and it all disappeared! Hardly ever anxious or stressed now

Running
Swimming
Going to church
Singing
Playing piano

exercise or a good book for me.

Hot bath
pilates
listening to a podcast in bed
walk in the fresh air

turning boring chores into slower rituals - actually more time efficient and calming getting things done this way then rushing around.

10mins stretch and breathing on the living room floor when things get overwhelming.

good sleep regulates me emotionally as well.

Baths, podcasts, reading. Sound baths, diamond painting and colouring.

You sound just like me, right down to the jaw clenching at night. My go to relaxation is knitting or crocheting. A PP said she does simple stuff with no counting involved, but for me, it is having to count, repeating patterns, repeating actions, that relaxes me. Or a long hot bath, reading, getting out for a long hike.

Crochet or knitting and reading mainly.

Pilates
Wine
Reading
Box breathing if a panic attack is coming on

I feel the same as you . I am conscious that I just don’t ever feel relaxed and my iPhone tells me I am not getting much quality deep sleep. The only thing I know for sure will relax me is a weeks worth of walking barefoot , on the shore line breathing in the fresh salty air.

I love crochet, embroidery and colouring with a nice candle and something easy to watch in the tv or some good music in the background. It really takes my mind off everything and makes me feel very at peace. I find keeping my hands and mind busy combined with other sensory input is really effective at chilling me out (I’ve also experienced similar issues to you due to stress)

My other answer is video games 😂 I’m a huge gamer and nothing relaxes me like a bit of escapism on my ps5.

I’ve recently really got into sudoku/arrow words/various puzzles. Sometimes I find these super relaxing and sometimes they frustrate me, but they always take my mind off the other stuff going on.

I’m so glad I’m not the only gamer here! There’s no such thing as too old 💕

Knitting, crochet, cross stitch.
Gardening, esp repetitive tasks like weeding, pruning etc
Singing in a choir
Walking
Doing paper based puzzles and jigsaws
I think if you are v stressed trying to meditate etc is actually quite tough, I find activities that keep my mind and or body a bit occupied, but are not 'hard' as such help much more. So mindful activities really.

Colouring in.

Soak in a hot bubble bath
Calm App meditation
Yoga class - it took me quite a long time to get into but I've been doing it for 4 years now and it's great. You don't have to clear your mind, just let thoughts come and go and bring your attention back to your breathing. Takes practice but worth it!
Walking in the woods - being outside in nature definitely quietens my busy mind and the exercise is good too. I love being in the woods surrounded by trees and birdsong.

Magnesium cream slowly rubbed into my legs, for night cramps! But it somehow makes me very zen, and then I go to bed and sleep like a baby. If I wake up during the night and can't get back to sleep, I take a magnesium glycinate tablet, and off I go again. Magic stuff - well for me it is.

Although somewhere along the line I'm sure there is someone or some busy body who will announce that it is bad for me. Somehow all the good stuff is verboten, but I'll carry on regardless for now.

To add a new suggestion, I got into sound baths in a fairly big way.

I find they completely empty my mind, or at least my subconscious brain takes over and does all the heavy lifting, and when I come out, I feel lighter and calmer and clearer.

Obviously not an every day thing, but probably every 2-3 months. They sound a bit woo, but I love them.

Knitting and cross stitch
Online jigsaws and word games

Are you going ro have a scan if your headache continues? A bit worrying for it to last so long. Perhaps get your eyes checked too?

I had a 'fake door' built into a wall in a spare room a few years ago, the door opens but it is just a wall the other side. I open the door whenever I have something on my mind and shout (sometimes speak if guests are staying) it to the wall. I then close the door and the problems are quickly forgotten. Hence, leave your problems at the door.