If you were a bridesmaid, how much would you be prepared to pay for a hen do?

[Forgottenmyphone]

I’m interested, as my DH has just paid £800 for a stag weekend to Portugal (golfing!) and that doesn’t even include meals and drinks.

We/I would never pay + £800.
Don't earn that kind of money.
We/I wouldn't pay to go abroad.
It would be a "no, thank you have fun".

Oh my god! There's not a single person in the world I feel strongly enough about to spend £800 on a party 😱

I do think stag and hen parties are overall pretty ridiculous anyway tbf so my opinion is likely irrelevant 🤣

£200 tops. But I wouldn’t want to go on a weekend away out of the UK at all. A weekend in a UK cottage with a very small group of around 5 would be the dream - walks on a moor and an evening at a decent pub or restaurant and then breakfast on the Sunday before we all went off home - perfect.

The real dream would be a meal in a private room at a really good Michelin starred restaurant and then everyone home after.

A week / long weekend abroad of ‘Hen Party Antics’ involving any kind of coordinated clothing, t-shirts, sashes or ‘games’ and I would not be attending.

ETA: I would expect to pay more that £200 when it came to including food and drink. Happy to pay up to £100 for the meal for the cottage weekend and £200 for a meal in Michelin starred). My original £200 was for accommodation and petrol only. So probably more like £350 all in got a weekend in the UK

£150 which I would expect to include share of taxi, meal & drinks.

But I wouldn't go abroad on a hen do. They just aren't me thing.

I don’t think I could put an amount on it. Obviously being there for a friend is important but there’s more to it than just that like who else is going, where it is, if I enjoy the activity etc. Personally I’d say max £200 if it wasn’t really something I wanted to do and was more a friendship obligation but I would spend more if it was more like a proper holiday and I actually really wanted to go.

£800 for a weekend short haul excluding food and drink sounds really expensive for what is though?? But if it’s affordable to you guys and there’s money and time for you to do the equivalent with your friends then fair enough.

When we were in our 20s and lots of people were getting married weekends away, and hundreds to £1k ish was acceptable

we are now in our 40s and no one would really be interested in attending that sort of event. it seems much more a younger persons game.

if a friend was getting married I’d be a bit surprised if they had a “hen” but a meal out or a night at a spa would be fine, I’d pay £100-300 for that.

i think it just depends what’s normal in your circle

How long is a piece of string? If the event was a weekend in London, going to art galleries and theatre shows, I'd happily pay £800, because that would be v good value for something I'd really enjoy.
If it was a weekend in Spain going clubbing & doing stereotypical hen do stuff, I probably wouldn't even want to pay £80, as I know it's not my scene.
In other words, the location and content would decide, as for any other holiday.

I wouldn't go abroad for anyones hen, a night out is the most I would commit to and apart from a new outfit and hair I'd be ok with a max of £300 so long as we had good food and wine.

These days, max £200. Back when I was much more broke, I’d have preferred to stick to a night out which at that time I could probably have kept to £50 or so. I did go on a country weekend away for 8 of us, all cooking a big chilli together/big fry up for breakfast and we had a wonderful time, that was probably £150 each then. The problem now is that even a pretty simple weekend like that is going to hit £200-400 each just for the cottage. I’d still much prefer a decent pub crawl.

£150 max, but I don’t fancy weekends or trips away.

About £250. More for my best friend.

Yes for one of my best mates I’d spend that much. But it’s my money not family money…..and I’m old and fancy a break. Not golf though fgs.

I guess it would depend if it was something I'd really enjoy. If it was something I "had" to do with the hen £100 absolute max, if it was a good excuse to do something I'd always wanted to do anyway - a lot more. £800 is obscene!

OMG! I was thinking 'Hmmmm.... night out for a meal and a couple of drinks? £60 perhaps?'.

For an actual days away hen do. Not £800. That eats in too much to our family budget (but I am 52 now and have a disabled teenager so anything that takes away from the family is a non-starter).

In my younger more carefree days without mortgage etc, perhaps £500.

Ive never liked anyone enough to want to go away with them. Maybe £50 for a meal in a local restaurant. However its horses for courses. Whatever floats your boat.

This stag weekend is at a golf resort so I’m assuming it includes all their green fees for the three days. DH does really love golf and gets on really well with everyone else who’s going so I guess it’s not a waste of money. The thing that did put his back-up slightly (and mine) was that the groom and best man kind of expected everyone to go and pay.

Whatever the cost was. I assume if I’m bridesmaid this is a close friend.

I’m not married, but my friends came to Ibiza with me for a week for my 30th.

In contrast to seemingly most people of MN, my friends and I don’t mind spending money celebrating each other.

A lot of them self confessed don’t like anyone enough to spend time or money on them 😭 tough crowd 😂

I think it's crazy how stag weekends and hen weekends have become a thing over the last few years and people expect their friends to pay hundreds of pounds to go on holiday with them.

But I'm old enough to remember when stag and hen do's were just a pub crawl on the night before the wedding (or possibly a couple of days before if the bride and groom were very sensible) and I'm grumpy enough to not understand why that needed to change.

which is perfectly acceptable if you're all in the same financial position @Crushed23

I’d pay that much if it was an activity I want to do in a location I want to go to and it was going to include lots of people I like.

I’d only pay £1-200 for an obligation event, and even then I’d only do it for a bride I especially like.

Tbh I would prefer to spend a bit more to go on a sunny weekend away than pay less and do something UK based/that i would find boring. But I love an excuse for a sunny break!

The most I’ve ever spent on a hen do is around £150 that included a weekend at a spa hotel plus a meal out.

£800 is crazy imo.

I'd pay whatever I thought the holiday was worth. And if I didn't want to go, or didn't think it was worth it, then I wouldn't go.

Ultimately, you're paying for yourself to go on holiday. It costs what it costs.

Your DH is clearly happy to spend £800 on a golfing holiday. That doesn't seem particularly bad value for what it is. The fact it's a stag do is irrelevant, its a holiday he wants to go on and needs to pay for.

It cost me £600 for flights and accommodation for a long weekend abroad last year, then with spending money on top, it probably came to around to £1k. I happily paid it and had an amazing time.