Would you live in your current location if you had no family?

[Seashells02]

I live in my rundown hometown, about a 5min drive from parents and 15mins from siblings. I was thinking if my parents passed away, there’s no way I’d choose to live here.

I’d probably try and move abroad or further south. Does family keep you close or have you moved anyway and if so, do you regret it? What puts me off is the guilt as they get older.

I moved to the other end of the country 20+ years ago.
I didn't for one second think I wouldn't be able to get back and be with my mum when she died. Fucking covid.
I had and still have a lot of guilt and sadness about that.
I felt torn when mum became unwell (before covid) because I have family where I am, and moving then would have meant leaving them. Awful predicament.
And I wouldn't move back there now as I have nobody to go back for.
But I don't like where I live. Not sure I ever did tbh. Sorry thats not helpful 🤷🏻‍♀️

I'm over 4 hours away from my parents and wouldn't move back there if you paid me BUT it is becoming harder now they're older and despite claims they don't they need more support. They'll protest they don't need any help but whenever I visit there's a whole load of things need doing or resolving! That said, they're both pushing 80 and one has health conditions so I've had 20 years of living away and it not being an issue. I'm also lucky that my work is pretty flexible so i can go there and WFH or in one of the local offices.

Absolutely not. I would move back to London and live in a 1-bed flat for the same price as my average house in the south east commuter belt. But I have two young DC and elderly parents nearby, so here we are.

I've lived in the same boring Essex village all of my life. If it wasn't for DH loving it so much and elderly/unwell parents living around the corner I would have moved down South many years ago. When my parents and FIL pass away we will move (I have already told DH I will go without him if he still wants to stay here).

No. I left toxic town and toxic family as soon as I could.
I'll move areas again when my children have grown up.

My parents moved 200 miles away when I was 13. Their parents followed them a year later.

I moved away 7yrs ago aged 46. My parents threatened to follow me but DF has specialised cancer treatment so they've stayed put.

No, I don't regret it.

I would create Pros and Cons lists. On the one hand, for instance half an hour is still fairly close to your parents, but if you decide to take your mum up on her offer of childcare that half an hour (maybe 2 round trips a day) might eat into your free/work/family time too much.
You said you have a sibling nearby. You wouldn’t be abandoning your parents as they have your sibling. Even if you didn’t, would that prevent you moving. Many parents encourage their children to move away to follow their career/choice of location.

I don’t live near family. In laws who we did live nearby died. However we like living in the countryside and it’s a heck of a lot cheaper than living down south! Maybe one day when dc have finished school we will think about moving nearer but atm we are happy. Rent here is £500 where my family live its around £1200-1500.

We live almost 300 miles from our closest family member and some live overseas. I have relocated completely twice in my life and DH has 4 times including living overseas before I met him.

DS has said he doesn’t want us to live too far away as he has seen how visiting is such a palaver. Plus he has never known his grandparents that well.

DS GF is a Farmers DD so her home is very much ingrained in the blood. When they move in together they are looking to relocate closer to her family. Having all chatted about it they will probably end up around 20 mins from us in the future. They need to be close to the city they work in. We could offer some assistance with children if they have them in the future, as have retired in our fifties. Her family like all farmers I have ever known will work till they drop dead.

I haven’t lived down South for 32 years and nothing would induce me to return.

No. I'd rather live in London. I adore London and miss it. But we need the space as we have elderly parents living with us and can't afford a similar size house in London. And they wouldn't want to live in London anyway.

I’d definitely want to move, we’re in Greater London and DH is semi retired. Dd is now in the Royal Navy and won’t be living back here, I work in healthcare so could change jobs.
Selling up and buying something a lot cheaper elsewhere in the country is looking very attractive now

My parents have moved away. Dc in school I plan to move once the youngest is college age. I want to buy a home in a cheaper area with more amenities. I plan to spend some time looking at areas. Divorced so more freedom in some ways.

My parents got stuck they missed the boat to leave so ended up in viallge with few amenities. IL have a good location but very poor house for older age but they don't want upheaval now either despite really steep stairs putting FIL in hospital already.

We're no where near family - our location been governed by eduation work and house prices+size. We're here till DD2 finished A-levels and likely till she finished uni - and depends if other two boomerang back after uni.

DH asked me other day where I'd choose and I don't know - never had a completely free choice assume next choice will be governed by work as well. There are places I've loved and he has similar but some of that's been location plus time of life.

I don't want to live rurally - grew up like that so city but probably outskirts and even if we downsize think house prices will be a massive constraining factor.

I wouldn't move far, but if it wasn't for my kids and how much they like being here with school and friends I'd move 25 miles away and into the city. I'd like a bit more of a buzz around me, it's a little boring here.

I can't think of anything worse than living close to family !! But maybe you get on better with yours than I do.
But I'd struggle to leave where i am now because of friends... so I do see where you're coming from. It would be hard to set up again in a new place without people you love nearby, even if the place itself was idyllic.

I live 6 hours from my only family member. Have done for well over 20 years. I love where I live and have no desire to live near them. As I am sure my kids will move away when they are older as well.

I followed my heart & moved 200 miles away for a long time.
Came back when aged parent was ill, good timing though as was back while Covid raged, & moved to a smaller but cheaper & warmer newer house. Content enough now!

I wouldn't be. I love being close to family and that my DC sees grandparents every week, but if they weren't around I'd go closer to the coast without a second thought. I would so love to be able to see the sea without it requiring a full day to do so!

I’ve lived in London for 35 years and am now nearly 60. I never intend to leave here. I grew up in a rural market town and would have hated that life for my own DC, now young adults.

I don't live near my family. I moved with my exh and I'm now stuck here because of our son. It was fine until I got a chronic illness, my dad died and my mum doesn't drive much. It's really hard now.

I have raised my child alone with zero support (ex is not that helpful but he does see DS and there's a court order for contact so I can't move without permission).

It's difficult in both ways tbh. If you're near elderly parents you can support them but in small doses. If you live away, then you got visit for extended periods and it's hard work. It also eats up your annual leave.

Where I'm from is where I would rather be, but it's not where DS is from so that's another decision for later in life. I want DS to be near ISH me when I'm older. But I don't want to live here until I die.

Like loads of PP where we are a lot of people can’t afford to live near family because of house price inflation so it’s not even a question.
i’d live in a different place if I didn’t have kids though.

I don’t know really. I love where we live, we’re not too far from family and still in the region of where I grew up but I think if my family didn’t live around here I’d maybe move further out, possibly by the sea.