Page 3 | Anorexia. My first Christmas at a normal healthy weight. Would this affect how you treat me? .

AnonymousSlug · 2025-12-20T08:10:28+00:00

I know there's an eating disorders board, but I'm posting this here because I'm looking for all viewpoints. I'm 47, and have been anorexic and underweight all my adult life. This year, after a serious injury at work suddenly affected my mobility, I've reached a normal or healthy weight and body mass index for almost the first time ever. So not recovery so much as circumstance. It doesn't feel like a win. I have a huge, huge family and will be hosting most of them over Christmas, as well as spending time lots of social time with neighbours and friends in the village. I'm nervous about them seeing me this size. How do you think they might respond or react or speak to me differently? What would you do differently?

whatisforteamum · 21/12/2025 18:48

Hi I guess it depends how underweight you were before but I hope they don't comment.
I've had periods of anorexia twice when I was younger.My family were obese so outsiders would comment as I was dangerously thin.
Fast forward 25 yrs and people say I'm thin when my BMI is 21.
I ignore all comments tbf.I wish you well on this difficult journey.

whatisforteamum · 21/12/2025 18:55

To everyone commenting that there are people with really serious issues that need NHS help anorexia isn't a choice.
It's a potentially fatal illness.Apparently lots of anorexia suffers are autistic.
I'm pursuing this now at 58.

Original poster

AnonymousSlug · 30/12/2025 09:34

UPDATE

Thought I'd come back to this thread now that Christmas is over.

Nobody commented on my weight or appearance. Not one. Not even once. I'm very pleased about that, because I know I'd have taken even the most sensitively-worded and kindly-intended comments completely the wrong way.

People did treat me differently though. No little-kiddie voices, no amazed thanks for my hosting them. Instead, I felt as though I was treated like an adult. I liked that.

What I'm not pleased with and not liking, though, I can now fit only into the clothing size of the average slim middle-aged woman of my height. I'm trying to be grateful that at least I had money to buy so many new nice things. But that's anorexia, I know.

Thank you to everyone who has been so supportive on here.

OP posts:

ManyPigeons · 30/12/2025 09:46

Didn’t RTFT

ManyPigeons · 30/12/2025 09:48

Im Glad it went well OP. Please seek some help though - it’s not healthy to be sad that you’re a slim, healthy woman. Healthy means you’re not sick… being sick is dangerous and not something to aspire to. Please work on your self esteem.

StarsTwinklingPomanders · 30/12/2025 09:48

People spend a lot of time thinking about themselves especially with a disorder like this .
So I don't think many people would actually notice.

LivingwithHopenowandforever · 30/12/2025 10:09

AnonymousSlug · 30/12/2025 09:34

UPDATE

Thought I'd come back to this thread now that Christmas is over.

Nobody commented on my weight or appearance. Not one. Not even once. I'm very pleased about that, because I know I'd have taken even the most sensitively-worded and kindly-intended comments completely the wrong way.

People did treat me differently though. No little-kiddie voices, no amazed thanks for my hosting them. Instead, I felt as though I was treated like an adult. I liked that.

What I'm not pleased with and not liking, though, I can now fit only into the clothing size of the average slim middle-aged woman of my height. I'm trying to be grateful that at least I had money to buy so many new nice things. But that's anorexia, I know.

Thank you to everyone who has been so supportive on here.

Hi OP, Having just read your thread it was lovely to read your update. I must admit as I was reading your thread and not knowing anyone personally who has a ED I would never have thought that a simple you look well etc is just simply the wrong thing to say and I am glad I know now as I would never wish to hurt anybody else’s feelings. X

itsthetea · 30/12/2025 10:15

Thanks for the update

Original poster

AnonymousSlug · 30/12/2025 10:19

ManyPigeons · 30/12/2025 09:48

Im Glad it went well OP. Please seek some help though - it’s not healthy to be sad that you’re a slim, healthy woman. Healthy means you’re not sick… being sick is dangerous and not something to aspire to. Please work on your self esteem.

Thank you. I am. Have been doing for the last 30+ years.

OP posts:

PinkArt · 30/12/2025 14:15

AnonymousSlug · 30/12/2025 09:34

UPDATE

Thought I'd come back to this thread now that Christmas is over.

Nobody commented on my weight or appearance. Not one. Not even once. I'm very pleased about that, because I know I'd have taken even the most sensitively-worded and kindly-intended comments completely the wrong way.

People did treat me differently though. No little-kiddie voices, no amazed thanks for my hosting them. Instead, I felt as though I was treated like an adult. I liked that.

What I'm not pleased with and not liking, though, I can now fit only into the clothing size of the average slim middle-aged woman of my height. I'm trying to be grateful that at least I had money to buy so many new nice things. But that's anorexia, I know.

Thank you to everyone who has been so supportive on here.

I'm pleased to read this. If you can, try to hold onto that nice feeling and let it beat the uncomfortable feelings around clothing. Fitting slim adult clothes sounds like you're at a genuinely healthy weight. People around you will be so happy for you, heck this stranger is so happy for you, so I hope you can find an element of happiness in it too.

ArwenUndomniel · 30/12/2025 18:29

I'm so glad things went well for you. I myself had a slightly awkward conversation with my dad where he asked what my "secret" to weight loss was because he just can't shift his belly, but I think I managed that by talking vaguely about protein and sugar. I'm not excessively underweight and I did eat a bit over Christmas, so I doubt if anyone in my family would think I had an ED - in their minds, those are only for people who are severely thin and who don't eat at all.

I won't comment on your mindset about clothes sizing because I would feel exactly the same way and I know what a monumental effort it takes to get out of that way of thinking. I've never managed it despite years of therapy and dietician input. It's so complicated and I wish I knew how it was done.