Do you have your own savings?

[everdine]

My partner and I have always had our own savings. This was why I didn’t want to get married when we were about to have children as I had savings. I wanted to keep them just in case things didn’t work out.

We have now had a civil partnership (once they became legal for heterosexual couples.) We still have kept our own savings but I have money in an online account that he doesn’t know about.

I have never wanted to be blindsided if he left me and our children and find that I had no money. We are happy now but reading on her so many men seem to leave their wives.

Yes - and a full time job. If DH and I were ever to split I'd be completely fine financially.

Absolutely. My Mum also did and I’ve advised my young adult children to do the same. DH also has his own savings- we only share two joint accounts, one for bills and one for joint savings.

None of us know what the future holds and we need our own financial resources.

Thank you for the replies. I was always encouraged by my dad to have my own money.

Surely if you divorced, all assets would have to be declared and (usually) split 50/50?

Yes dp and I both do, and will continue to do so once we’re married. But then we are old and both have adult children from previous relationships, so our finances are pretty separate (tenants in common etc). Make sure your will is up to date.

We have wills since having children but if my partner left I wouldn’t tell him about my secret online account. Financially I could cope as I work and have savings.

@everdine As you’ve entered a civil partnership if you were to apply for a dissolution I’m fairly certain you would have to declare all your assets, including your secret account.

I didn’t know that!

We keep our finances separate, in the main.

We have a shared account that we put £x in for day to day expenses - mortgage, nursery fees etc.

Financial independence is important to me.

@supersprout Eventually the assets will be divided, but you need to be able to pay bills while everything is being sorted out.

One of my friends let everything be joint with her stupid ex-DH and when he left, he cleared out all the accounts- you’re not supposed to do this, but people do. For months, she was struggling to pay the mortgage and household bills. Yes, she eventually got a percentage, but you always need a decent reserve in your name only IYSWIM.

I'm single, but in the past, yes, I have always had savings tucked away for an emergency, and it has proved to be a good thing.

That’s awful when you hear stories like that. I would have the money to keep a roof over my and children’s head and pay bills.

You should look into the legalities of that.

In a dissolution you have a legal obligation to disclose all accounts and savings.

I’ve had savings in my own name (for tax purposes) but all money from whatever source has always been ‘ours’. It’s worked for us (married over 50 years) but I know it wouldn’t be right for many others.

I’ve just looked it up and you are right!

Yes, we have separate finances apart from the joint account we both contribute to for the bills, food shop etc. So I do have my own savings account.

That doesn't happen overnight. It takes time so a separate savings is a good idea until assets can be split.

It also means that just in case a separation/divorce gets nasty, the ex doesn't have access to it. Joint accounts can be emptied by the other person without any warning.

I do have savings, actually at DH's insistence we both do.

When his first wife died their main bank account (which should have just switched to being his) was frozen. It was tidally unexpected and he had to borrow from PIL and use his credit card while it was sorted.

We also have our money in different banks after being caught up that time when you couldn't use our cards anywhere, take cash out or anything.

Yes, and always have. No joint account and have been married for nearly 35 years. I had a pre-nup too.

It would all have to be declared if we split.

We know what we each have approximately. I know where all hos papers are filed and the passwords/account details are in the safe. And vice versa. No idea what's sitting in his current account presently or he mine. When he was self employed I didn't know exactly what his earnongs were either although he didn't hide it.

We have never had to discuss money much. We are both good with money and more pertinently we have always had enough.

@everdine Oh he really is a bad ‘un, constantly trying to avoid paying CMS and generally making her life difficult.

None of us want to think of our partners behaving so badly (esp. when their children are involved) but it happens. Best to be prepared.

I’ve just looked it up and you are right!

The legal side of things like that aren't actually very different to marriage and divorce.

Yes they would, but there’s a huge difference between being able to leave knowing you have immediate access to money no one can access until a formal financial order has been put into place, and being unable to pay the bills because your ex has cleared out the only money you had access to.

I have lots of savings pots that Dh doesn’t access as I’m more of a financial organiser and saver in our family. But I’d assume all would be split 50/50 were we to split, so it would make much difference. We are married, but is that not the model for civil partnerships too?

Just seen @InfoSecInTheCity ‘s post, which makes sense :-)

We both do. Joint account for bills only.

I’ve never wanted to be reliant on anyone else.