Why do people want monstrously big houses?

[pumpkinscake]

Well, some people. I'm watching the beast in me on Netflix, and wondering why anyone would want such large houses? I don't see the point. No matter how much money I had. Now, I don't want a studio apartment either, but surely, one spare room for guests, a utility room, a home office. After that what's the point? I see large houses on the market, most people have small families, just seems such a pointless waste of space.

To keep big monsters in?

I would have separate self contained wing for guests/family, loads of entertaining space, massive kitchen, separate utility room, kids rooms with space for friend to stay over, garden room... Courtyard, walled garden, swimming pond, private beach....

My friends step dad and mum are extremely wealthy, they and their equally wealthy friends all 'tour' each others country houses to socialise, they rarely stay in hotels other than for specific events.

It is a different way of living, but if you've got the money and you enjoy it...

Isn’t OP talking about houses that only Elton John could afford? Not just “normal” large houses?

I sort of agree. We have a large 4 bed but we use every inch of it. Garage, office, all the bathrooms and toilet. I wfh in spare room, hubby wfh downstairs office. Garage is a stockroom/ workshop, boot room full of wet suits/football boots.

but I wouldn’t dare go any bigger as it’s already a pig to keep clean and maintain and we are also going to be ratting around in it when the kids eventually fly

I reckon some people want privacy or a large plot and that tends to go with big houses.

I'm sorry FullLondonEye, that's a very difficult childhood you had

I agree with you op. I just couldn’t be bothered with a massive house-more to clean. I would like a spare bedroom (on top of the 5 we need for 4 kids and us, a decent sized utility room and possibly a sort of second ‘quiet’ lounge to sit in (which would actually be quite a big house really but not monstrously so). Any more than that is surely just a pain to maintain and clean?

When the kids are gone Dh and I plan to downsize to a two bed (preferably a cottage but we would consider a flat), so we have a spare room if anyone comes to stay but it won’t be huge as we just wouldn’t need loads of room most of the time. The kids can host us for family gatherings! It will be their turn :) we will only ever have one dog at a time in future (we have three at the minute, the third being a sort of dog we got slightly by accident though a happy one) which also means we can cut down on space needed.

@pumpkinscake I'm intrigued by the program that sparked this train of thought ? What is the best in me ?

Sorry @FullLondonEyethat you did not get the parents you needed or deserved. I think you are very brave under those circumstances to have them come and live with you.

I've always thought you could never have too much space.
My house is bigger downstairs than up.
Two sitting rooms, an office, dining room, dining kitchen and utility. Four bedrooms.
When we had DC at home it was great to have separate rooms for different things.
It's just two of us now and all the rooms are used regularly except for one bedroom. I used a bedroom as a sewing room. The smallest bedroom as a dressing room. One bedroom isn't used unless we have a DC visiting.
When there's only two of you the place doesn't get messy so is easy enough to keep clean and tidy.
It's big enough but not monstrous.

Thank you. I have come to terms with that but I also understand that it's what's behind my need to have a really big house. Yes, the upkeep and cleaning is a nightmare but it fills a sort of primal need for me so I've decided it's worth it. It's nothing like any house that Elton John would ever own 😂- I do like a lot of fresh flowers around but I don't think they've ever come from a florist, they're from the garden and often classed as weeds, I believe! However by normal standards it would be a quite spacious eight bedroom house. Those would be fairly normal sized bedrooms but we've knocked it about a lot to make four huge bedrooms (plus the one in my parents' apartment) plus similarly spacious bathrooms. My daughters' bathroom has a large bath, a large walk-in shower and a double vanity for them - it's the equivalent of a reasonable sized bedroom. I have a huge library/craft room/office, my husband has a man cave. There's a laundry room, a big walk in pantry etc. Oh, and a playroom for the children. We also have a good acre of land around us. I don't mean to boast about it, just to explain because a lot of it still looks like a builder's yard 😭, and while I obviously plan for it to look amazing when done, I'm great at achieving on a tight budget! No cleaner or gardener here by the way 😢. We could never have afforded anything this size if it didn't need a lot of work and we love doing it anyway. So yes, on the one hand you could say it's monstrous and excessive but the reason I want that is nothing to do with being flash, quite the opposite. It feels calm and comforting to me to have that amount of space.

My ideal house would be monstrously large. 5 or 6 bedrooms. At least 4 baths and a guest loo. We're a family of four, but DH and I sleep separately, and I would like to be able to host Christmas without people sleeping in the lounge. Large Lounge kitchen diner. A library. A gym. 2 offices. Maybe a snug. A craft room. A pantry. A utility. Plenty of storage. Part of me would also like a separate dining room for fancy meals, but I could lose that without much concern.

I've always preferred larger houses that I've lived in.

That's kind but I want to clear that I have my own reasons for doing it. It's not because I'm a good, forgiving person! 😂I suppose I must be pretty brave though, thinking about it 😎. Mind you it could all go wrong yet. At least there's plenty of patio to bury them under if one day I snap... 😮😉

I live in a big house and my husband often works away, so it’s just me and the dogs here for the most part. But it does mean when our family descend upon us at any given time to visit, we can have them stay in comfort.

I lived in a really big house for a while. ExH chose it and loved it. Me less so.

it really, really needed staff and we didn’t have staff. We had a cleaner which was great, but it really needed a gardener and a pool person and a maintenance person as well.

when I got divorced I moved to a lovely warm new build.

oh yeah, it was always cold in winter as well. Like really cold.

I love my small cosy new build.

Most UK houses are pretty small and they cost a fortune regardless so it seems most people in the UK agree with you OP. Damn those vulgar telly yanks.

I would love to have a monstrously big house! I wouldn't host and have lots of guests though, it would just be for me and my family! I'd have separate bedrooms from DH, and my own office for admin and study, and an art studio (maybe 2, one for 2D work and one for 3D), a gym, a library, and dance/yoga room. The dcs would have their own bedrooms, a study room, a big gaming room with VR sets, a couple of playrooms, a soft play room, music room, a cinema room, indoor pool, a gymnastics/trampoline room. A bathroom for everyone and archive rooms for storing stuff like photos and notebooks. Loads of storage for other stuff too, a huge kitchen with pantry and several freezers and space to store gadgets. We'd have a big hall that would be big enough to rollerskate in and outdoor areas for bike tracks, and skateboard ramps.

In reality I wouldn't like having such a big place that you need other staff to keep on top of it. We have a 4 bed house which is larger than any home I've lived in (but would be a fairly average size outside London), and I struggle to manage everything in it, but we don't have a cleaner because I'd find it a big loss of privacy.

It's very interesting to read people's fantasy houses. Mine is less about space, and more about views, warmth, storage, and lots of things to do nearby. So maybe a penthouse flat with a big balcony.

And light. Lots of light.

If money were no object and someone else would be cleaning and maintaining all this, I would want:
Enough bedrooms for hs to have one each that's just for us, plus at least 2 guest bedrooms so that we can have a family to stay not just a couple (so min 6 bedrooms excl studies).
DH & I to have a study each, and me to have a craft room (that's another 3 rooms that would probably be defined as bedrooms by estate agents, so it would be advertised as 9 bedroom.
At least 4 bathrooms, possibly 5 (nb must be one on each floor of the house).
I think it would be sensible to have 2 kitchens because one oven isn't enough on Christmas Day and if entertaining the "private"/backroom kitchen could contain thr mess and chaos and the "main" kitchen that guests might see could be a little less chaotic. Obviously a large laundry room too. An exercise studio room with various bits of equipment.
Dining room big enough for 16 so that I can host whole wider family.
Separate boardgaming room.
2 sitting rooms - one of which is elegant sophistication with classic furniture and an open fire. The other is more about a massive screen with games consoles and recliner seating for movie nights.

It wouldn't be a pointless waste of space to me. I love hosting and entertaining but we have no spare bedrooms and our kitchen-diner can seat 6 at a pinch so I hardly ever get to do it. All the rooms we have are multifunctional and used for each different thing in a slightly unsatisfactory way and having a dedicated room would enable each thing to be done properly in a dedicated environment. We'll never be rich enough to have that level of luxury though.

I would want that EXACT same outbuilding as you for my husband's hobbies except it also needs to have space for LARP weaponry and costumes, and then my actual house will be totally fine and the right size!

I've had a small house and it was horrible and stressful.

I've now got a house with a bedroom each for DC, and one for me and DH, a bathroom and two ensuites, an office each for me and DH, a cloakroom, a utility, a kitchen, a dining room, a living room, a playroom, and a conservatory.

They all get constant use. It doesn't feel too big at all, and in fact I would love an extra space to use as a gym where I could just leave everything out.

I do agree that houses with lots of rooms that mostly stay empty, like guest bedrooms, feel very museum like and depressing.

They definitely have to be take your shoes off at the door people- the cleaning!!!

@pumpkinscake , I’m not sure of your definition of ‘monstrously big’. My husband and I moved from our family home to a tiny bungalow which we redeveloped. We now live mostly just the two of us in a 5 double bedroom house with 5 bathrooms, a study a huge store room and a gym alongside a huge open plan kitchen, lounge a dining area.
We wanted this space so our entire family could spend time together. This seems entirely reasonable to me.

This is hilarious. I will save a link to post on the next thread about how people who have paid off their mortgages should downsize to make room for the next generation, as they are all overcrowded in poky hovels whilst so-called 'Boomers' rattle around in their three bed semis.