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Original poster

Have you ever found something belonging to your parents that made you see them in a different light?

502 replies

Screenager · 30/10/2025 18:37

When I was a teen I found a sex toy in my mum’s drawer. I shouldn’t have been snooping.

It made me think of her differently, and I felt a bit weird about it for a bit.

I’m over it now, I think 🤔

OP posts:
Borethefuckoff · 31/10/2025 09:14

HelpMeGetThrough · 31/10/2025 05:46

This particular one is an “eye opener” for the poster’s husband.

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omg if I found that belonging to my parents I’d want the ground to swallow me up! Eurgh

VictoriaEra · 31/10/2025 09:16

RaraRachael · 30/10/2025 19:20

No they don't

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Agree. No, not ‘everyone’.

Quashsquash · 31/10/2025 09:17

Upcyled · 31/10/2025 00:16

She shared when I was around 19 yes. It has affected her whole life she spoke about the day the baby was taken and how the girls had to dress their babies and leave them in the nursery and the adopters would come and take the one they wanted and the mothers found out afterwards which one had gone. She went home the next day and it was never spoken about.

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How harsh and heartbreaking! I’m not surprised it affected her whole life, the poor thing.

LancashireButterPie · 31/10/2025 09:18

When MIL died, we found a big jar of arsenic in the bottom of her wardrobe. It looked to be Victorian. No idea why she had that but I was her most despised person so I count myself lucky I got out alive.
When my DF died we found a huge padlocked metal box in his shed. It was heavy and clearly contained something. I asked DH to open it and if it was something terrible not to tell me. It held a huge industrial drill. Dad was a miner and had clearly "liberated" this from work (when his mine closed?) but we had no idea why he thought he needed it, or Indeed how he got it home......he caught the bus to work and didn't drive 🤣.

Shodan · 31/10/2025 09:18

Thunderpants88 · 31/10/2025 05:53

off topic but what is the point of a sex swing?

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I always imagine (quite wrongly, I assume) that the woman sits upon the swing, legs akimbo, and the man stands in front of it with his...erm... member pointing in the general direction of. Then the game is to see whether the two parts can meet with each swing. I suppose points could be scored according to how close they get to the bullseye. Like darts, for example. Or archery.

Matronic6 · 31/10/2025 09:19

Around 12 my friend found a box of condoms in her parents room. We were so disgusted because they were completely 'ancient' and shouldn't be doing it if they didn't even want kids anyway (Catholic school girls). Her parents would have even been 40.

I also remember my younger brother found lube in my parents room and assumed it was hair gel and stole it for his wet look. Think he was using it for a couple of weeks before my mum found it in his room.

Glowingup · 31/10/2025 09:20

Shodan · 31/10/2025 09:18

I always imagine (quite wrongly, I assume) that the woman sits upon the swing, legs akimbo, and the man stands in front of it with his...erm... member pointing in the general direction of. Then the game is to see whether the two parts can meet with each swing. I suppose points could be scored according to how close they get to the bullseye. Like darts, for example. Or archery.

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Yeah I think that’s not quite how it works but I’ve never used one to be fair. But I’d imagine that could be rather painful for the man.

surreygirly · 31/10/2025 09:32

PiccadillyPurple · 30/10/2025 19:25

No sex toys in my house. Totally unnecessary if you have hands and a brain.

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Not if you are into fetish etc 😀

surreygirly · 31/10/2025 09:37

Hons123 · 30/10/2025 22:43

Spot on, it is not compulsory to normalise perversion.

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LOL
You sound great fun
😀

LushLemonTart · 31/10/2025 09:40

Jimmyneutronsforehead · 30/10/2025 21:39

Not found anything physical, but when my grandad was alive I was a proper grandads girl. He did a lot of my care as my mum was a single working parent and as he aged he needed a lot of care so as a teenager I became a child carer for him as his COPD progressed.

He was a radar technician in the RAF and I used to love listening to his wacky tales. If a story started with "back in my day" I was sat. Absolutely captured.

He told me this one tale about aliens. I was absolutely gripped. He said he and the lads had just been out to the pub, and they were walking past the airfield when all of a sudden this UFO crash landed, and from the wreckage came an alien. They were all terrified, shaking, but brave, they all ran off to tell their superiors of this absolutely phenomenal discovery, but when they all got back to the airfield there was no trace of a crash or alien.

I used to love staying up late cuddling up to him watching those science docuseries with the crazy aliens guy, and it really spurred this curiosity in me that there must be life in the universe that isn't just us. It also must have given him so much comfort that he could tell someone who, however absurd it sounded, believed him and loved hearing his stories.

He died 12 years ago, not long after my 18th birthday.

After his funeral, we were all talking about our memories with him and I retold this story in the presence of my nan who turned a shade of white I didn't know someone could go. I asked her what was wrong and she said that grandad did go to the pub, and did walk back past the airfield, and there was a crash but it wasn't aliens it was one of his best friends and they all tried to save him but somebody had to run off to get help, which grandad did, but he was dead on impact. This really messed my grandad up, he had a mental breakdown, doused the house in petrol while my nan and the kids were asleep, and tried to kill everybody.

She said she never thought of him the same after that but only stayed with him as he was so unwell, but he became so angry and violent afterwards, he only really changed once us grandchildren came along.

I couldn't imagine my kind, wonderful grandad going through something so horrible but it makes more sense than aliens, but then to become so horribly abusive too.

Growing up I remember my nannan being cold and snappy with him a few times and often thinking that she was being a bit short and out of order with him, but now I see him in a completely different light and understand my nan feels like she wasted so much life on him and became a carer to someone she didn't really care for, and only had a limited amount of empathy.

Omg that's so sad. I'm so sorry your memories were tarnished.

LillyPJ · 31/10/2025 09:43

Tomatocutwithazigzagedge · 31/10/2025 06:45

Back on the 80s, when I was a teen, and when film reel was sent away to Truprint and the photos were posted back, I once found a packet on the doormat. Thinking they were holiday photos and the usual 10 of the cat by the electric fire to use up the reel, I cracked them open.

It was an entire reel of photos of my mother in various lingerie sets, posing in the lounge. Fair enough, they were entitled to a private life, but I was slightly put off by the ones of her, legs akimbo and holding the dog.

Hunting for Christmas presents in the drawers under their bed was a risky operation too, various copies of adult literature and a dildo were hidden beneath the spare blankets.

'holding the dog' really made me laugh! 😂

letmehaveathink · 31/10/2025 09:46

TheLivelyRose · 30/10/2025 18:48

Yes, I found everything after my mother died.

When I was clearing out her house, I found in her bottom clothes drawer a keepsake box full of things from my sister's life. Little cards, she'd written mum, samples of her school work right from primary up to university. There was nothing for me.

When I cleared out the garage, it was overloaded with boxes of my sister's possessions. There were schoolbooks right from reception age, all the way up to university. Not one single book or exercise book from school have been thrown out of my sisters.

You ve probably already guessed it.I ve found a few items of mine. Maybe an exercise book from when I was eleven in my first year of secondary school, but that was about it.

The garage was an archive of my sister's entire life.And virtually nothing of mine had been kept.

It made me see my mother in a very different light.As obviously I didn't mean that much to her. I was always the mature and sensible one ( although I was the youngest)who was called upon to sort out everybody's problems, which was why I was clearing the house out.Whilst my sister did the square root of fuck all.

Edited

Playing devil's advocate here, but maybe she tackled your room one week, and then never got around to getting rid of your sisters stuff? I cleared my sons room a few years before my daughters. Just because the task is so overwhelming. I can imagine that if I had fallen ill between the two clear outs (so not able to do the second one), that my children would have jumped to the same conclusion, which would be absolutely false.

letmehaveathink · 31/10/2025 09:47

greywolfie · 30/10/2025 18:44

I used to keep a specialist sex toy in a box in the wardrobe. When my children got a bit older, I used to worry they'd find it if anything happened to us. So I put a sticker on it saying 'This is a sex toy- don't open- just bin x'
Item got lost in a house move.

Edited

My guess is that the removal men threw it away, as per your instructions on the box. They probably wondered why you didn't just throw it yourself! LOL.

Whereismyfleeceblanket · 31/10/2025 09:48

Not my df but a friend's... Large amount of porn mags in a loft cupboard...
Shocked I guess as he was very upstanding.. As a teen he was quite Well To Do in my eyes.. Even ironed his money before it went in his wallet.. Glad I only caught him in pants at the ironing board not in the loft cupboard..

LushLemonTart · 31/10/2025 09:49

SomewhatAnnoyed · 31/10/2025 06:07

If it makes you feel any better - it may have been untouched bc she hadn’t wanted to ‘spoil’ it, if that makes sense. It may have actually meant a great deal to her and she wanted to keep it exactly how you made it as it was so special to her because of this.

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Yes I thought that too.

LillyPJ · 31/10/2025 09:49

RaraRachael · 31/10/2025 07:12

No, everyone doesn't masturbate same as everyone doesn't use sex toys.I've never done either in my life. I wish people would stop making these generalisations.

@SomewhatAnnoyed yes even at 14 I was put over my father's knee and my arse smacked so hard I could barely sit on it but that was just normal life in the 70s.

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You've still not said how masturbation is a 'perversion'. I agree that not everyone does it but, if a perversion is something that deviates from the norm, then I'd suggest that never having masturbated is probably more of a perversion for adults.

Glowingup · 31/10/2025 09:53

LillyPJ · 31/10/2025 09:49

You've still not said how masturbation is a 'perversion'. I agree that not everyone does it but, if a perversion is something that deviates from the norm, then I'd suggest that never having masturbated is probably more of a perversion for adults.

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Yes I’d say that’s very unusual to have never masturbated in your life.

Beamur · 31/10/2025 09:54

Clearing my PIL house I found a box under the bed. With many of the gifts we'd given MIL over the years. She obviously hadn't liked them much but was somehow too polite to get rid of them!

LillyPJ · 31/10/2025 09:57

Imaginethatifyoucan · 31/10/2025 07:37

Smacking was normal in the seventies.

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I agree that smacking was certainly not frowned upon in the 70s in the way it is now. I remember my mum snacking my legs when I was teenager (and looking back, I was being so unbearably awful I don't blame her!) and the cane was still a possible punishment at my comprehensive school. But having your arse smacked until you could barely sit down definitely wasn't normal by any means.

usedtobeaylis · 31/10/2025 09:59

When I was about 6 or 7 I found my (bio) dad's stash of porn, put them all in a bag, and took them outside to play 'libraries' with the neighbours 😂

I vaguely remember my dad coming out and retrieving them, but more vividly remember looking at one and it was a 'doctor and nurse' photo story. I didn't realise it was porn until a good few years later but that one page is seared into my mind.

My dad always seemed a quiet man to me who wouldn't say boo to a goose so I guess knowing he went out of his way to get top shelf material made me think there were obviously other aspects of his personality I wasn't aware of.

Citrusbergamia · 31/10/2025 10:02

Everythingisfire · 30/10/2025 21:23

Basically had a whole other family, girlfriend, kids while still married, the other woman knew about us, we did not know about them. He lived with them when he “worked away” away it turns out was about 5 miles away. They had everything nicer, they got the fun Disney dad type man, which I didn’t even know existed. I laugh looking back now, as it’s so ridiculous, but I always think what a spineless man, pick a lane, get a divorce if you want another family.

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This happened to an Aunt of mine. Married to her H for years and discovered he'd been having an affair. Which was bad enough! He promised to stop it but didn't, Aunt found out it was still going on so kicked him out. Followed him in the car to a house, not that far from theirs and he'd moved in with his OW. Only we then find out that the OW had been his bit on the side for the whole marriage...they had a child together and when he was 'working away', he'd gone abroad with his 2nd family for holidays. My Aunt never noticed that he came back very tanned each time mind. Just boggling how he got away with it for about 20 years!! I don't know how my cousins continued to have a relationship with him after finding out all that.

JamieCannister · 31/10/2025 10:10

Ihgdeyjnvd · 30/10/2025 18:49

I need to know how it ended up getting lost and where it ended up 😂😂

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One might make a joke along the lines of "you know exactly where it ended up, do you need me to spell it out for you?", but that might be a little too much, so I won't.

LillyPJ · 31/10/2025 10:17

I was really surprised to find a huge stack of newspapers under my mum's bed - all Royal memorabilia. I'd never seen her show the slightest interest in the royal family.

theressomanytinafeysicouldbe · 31/10/2025 10:20

Notmyreality · 31/10/2025 08:36

Viz? How shocking. Have you had therapy to come to terms with the trauma?
Also I’m doing a poll - do you masturbate?

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Why the comment? I was around 7/8 and it was 40 years ago, I didn't know what I was looking at

I hope you've answered your poll, cause you are obviously a wanker

RaraRachael · 31/10/2025 10:22

@LillyPJ It wasn't me who said masturbation and sex toys were a perversion. That was another poster.

It's not my cup of tea and I can't imagine any of my friends doing it. They certainly wouldn't admit to it.

I grew up with strict parents in the 70s. Not everybody has the same life experience.

Each to their own. Doesn't mean somebody is right and somebody is wrong.