"Maybe he's neurodivergent!" Gaslighting women to excuse inequality and abuse

[Shookethh]

This doesn’t get discussed enough.

Emotional abuse, inequality, and maltreatment are not symptoms of any form of neurodivergence--and to imply otherwise is ableist.

m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=pfbid0A4PYW6MFRo8R2vkRDVkAgADFxecPz5fJpAX87mZNeuJ2uwT9cWavQZqT8UPa2V7pl&id=100046928407018

It gets discussed a lot on MN.

The topic often crops up on 'relationships' threads started by women who are finding their DP's behaviour difficult, strange, abusive, whatever. Someone will always come along and suggest that he might have ADHD, be autistic, or have some random mental health condition, and then lots of other people will respond to that by saying it might be an 'explanation' but it does not give someone carte blanche to be obnoxious or abusive.

Nobody is told that they have to put up with it. The OP will be advised that in fact she does not have to stay because he is neurodiverse, and she should definitely LTB. Other people will also point out that you can be both neurodiverse and an abusive bastard at the same time.

The is a lot of talk about sticking to your vows and what would you want him to do if you were unwell.

So I would say that people are told to find ways around their own feelings and told to put yo with it.

I have never, ever read a thread discussing an abusive partner and the OP being told to stick to her vows

Neurodiversity is not an excuse for being abusive, they don't go hand in hand

Found today. OP being told there is defo some neurodiversity going on.

www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5420944-to-think-i-maybe-just-have-to-lower-my-expectations-and-realise-that-dh-will-never-change?page=2&reply=147553919