To ask if you wished you grew up in a bigger house? Or did it not matter?

[Apricotmuffino]

Having a bit of a moment 😁

So we've spent more money on our 3 bed house than we had initially planned, it was a complete doer upper and initially we had planned to live in it for 5-7 years. Well time has gone fast, we are coming up to 6 years now, the house is much better, and I- think- were happy here but it's quite small and were thinking of expanding our family further very soon (3 to 4) and although it's a 3 bed house the 3rd room is miniscule so 2 children would likely have to share rooms. We have a small garden but big enough for children to play, great location with a nearby park and close to a train station.

The thing is, to upsize would cost a considerable amount more, prices seem to have rocketed and even a house 100k more than this would wouldn't actually get us much more in the same area. We could afford it but we wouldn't have the same disposable money, and would likely need to save hard for a few years.

I like having disposable money but I also feel guilty having 2 children in a house that's small. For reference it's about 1100sqft (I am not sure if this includes the garage).

It got me thinking about childhood, I grew up in a smaller size house (900sqft) and I can't remember ever feeling miserable living there (I had the boxroom), we were lucky that my parents had enough money to take us on an annual holiday usually in Europe)

I dont know, pondering on what would give my family a better quality of life, a bigger house or more disposable money for holidays, toys etc

Interesting to hear from others if you dont mind sharing your thoughts whilst looking back on your living accommodation growing up!

Can't see either of our salaries jumping anytime soon but perhaps in 5 years or so?

Never thought about it to be honest the garden was nice but playgrounds are better. I used to love staying at families houses and they lived in flats and i never wanted to leave because cousins!!!

it really doesn’t matter

My house is 743sq ft (according to rightmove plan). The box room is 2.11m x 3 m and youngest dc is in there in a mid riser atm. When she is older her kallax unit will go and be replaced with a desk. Master bedroom is big enough for a desk for me to wfh.

The cost of upsizing in my area is similar to yours and quite frankly I begrudge paying nearly £2.5k a month mortgage until im 68 for a 1950s 3 bed semi which needs everything doing to it so we probably won't do that. We also like the street we live on. Loft conversion is a possibility for us.

I grew up in a slightly larger home but it was on a deprived council estate and I was one of 4 siblings and i shared a box room with my sister who was 7 years younger than me. My dcs have a room each and live in a lovely area - we might have a courtyard and a tiny kitchen and no second loo but they have the better deal than what I grew up with!

Your house sounds like the same as ours, a 3 bed semi, it would be worth asking a builder as we extended the box room into the master by about .5m (doesnt sound alot) but made a huge difference its now a good size single and if you flipped the bed the opposite way a small double and chest of drawers fit in (thinking teenage years). the box above the stairs was made into a wardrobe for hanging space. So currently it has a single bed an 8 cub kallax unit -the ‘wardrobe’ and a toy basket.

In terms of the master we have built in wardrobes, kingsize bed with bedside tables and a dressing table so didn’t really impact on that room at all.

ours also has a wrap around extension downstairs in what was the garage so theres a small playroom/office, utility room, toilet and then it made our kitchen diner bigger too- in terms of storing the garage stuff we have a large shed. The extension was in place before we bought, but its maybe an idea for you if dont want to move.

For what its worth we could sell and buy a 4 bed detached monetary wise however financial stability, holidays etc are my priority and i wouldn’t want to compromise on day to day life for a large mortgage. So it depends on what you value.

Fwiw i think your house sounds perfectly fine for two children long term, if i was in your position i would look at what i could do to make the current house work.

I raised four in a three bed. We were able to split the largest bedroom into two self
contained sections (they both had a window, heating, lighting etc) and the two youngest shared with bunk beds in the middle room.

It is doable. It just depends how easy the rooms are to work with. They’ve never said they felt the house was too small. It has been a bit tricker since the younger two got older but you might decide to move later in that case rather than right now.

Two children in a three bed house is absolutely fine, please don’t worry!

I'd say it may be fine when young, but would be difficult as they get older. We always had our own bedrooms growing up, occasionally when we were really young I'd let my little brother have a sleepover in my room, but as we got older there was no way this was going to happen! I see it now with my two girls. We have a 4 bed, 4th bedroom is a spare/office. The girls are 2 years apart, have their own rooms, and get on incredibly well, and until recently would spend most weekends having "sleepovers" together in each other's rooms (I never allowed it in the week as they disrupt eachothers sleep too much) But over the past year, they usually prefer their own space and very rarely do they now want to sleep in the same room. Sometimes youngest (9) will still ask, and eldest (11) will say no, and I tell her she has to respect that if she wants her own space. I guess if it weren't an option they'd just get used to having to share but I do think having their privacy and own space how they like it, is very important if possible.

I grew up as one of 5 siblings in a 4 bed house. Things were different then, we didn’t have tech or spend a lot of time in our rooms socialising like kids do today. We didn’t have lots of clothes, makeup etc to clutter up rooms either. We were not allowed friends over as most of us shared which meant we lost out on some friendships. When it came to exam years it got more difficult.

I never had my own bedroom until my older siblings eventually moved out - which is becoming later and later for many now. My dad suggested to my eldest 18 year old brother it was time for him to move out as it was getting crammed as we were all growing up. He went to live with my gran at that stage, they made out it was easier for uni, but it was due to space.

Frankly it was shit.

i would seriously consider if your priority should be providing decent space to raise the 3 dc you already have or extending your family further.

Sorry I have caused confusion

I have one dc and we want one more, so that would be 2 children in a 2.5 bed house!

I would be crazy to have 4 children in that house 😅

For your family, having g a toddler in a box room is fine for a couple of years. All toys can be stored in the larger room. Or they can both share. If you are paying childcare costs, your finances will undoubtedly improve when dcs are at school which may give enough flex I your budget to think about up sizing. I would stay where you are and enjoy your lovely house and the freedom of being financially comfortable.

I grew up in a small 3 bed (2 doubles and a box room). I shared with my sister until she was around 19, and she moved into the box room to have more privacy.

My own family had a similar setup when the dcs were small and only had a small yard, no garden. I have a ds and a dd, two tears apart. DD had the box room as a nursery. We moved when she was three to a house with 3 doubles and a decent garden.

Can you move a wall to make the 2 bedrooms more evenly sized? Put home office under the stairs, in a large cupboard or on the landing?
Can you convert a garage or put an insulated home office in the garden? When your children are teenagers one of them could sleep in it.

Oh I see op, well that’s fine then if it’ll only be for a few years I wouldn’t worry!