We’ve not been invited to anything by anyone all summer. No play dates. Nothing. Anyone else?

[Onionringsforbreakfast]

Got one DD age 7

We’ve not been invited to anything all summer. Nothing. Not one play date. I want to cry.

Have hosted at least 3x play dates and 2x BBQs at our house. I also tried to arrange a get together on the school year group WhatsApp but was met with tumbleweed.

Thankfully DD does various clubs and camps so she does see other kids her age.

I’m sat here wondering what’s wrong with me / us?? Or is this just life in 2025?

I feel awful for my kind, wonderful DD

It’s not you. It’s just family life these days.

I have been swamped with work this summer so kids have been in camps most of the summer, and other families I know are similar.

On the days we were at home, other families where either on holiday or parents working / kids at camp.

I love hosting and do it a lot. I’ve noticed that many other people just don’t do it and just don’t see friends that often. It’s a shame. I wonder if it’s a post Covid thing.

Well, this is a very sad thread that makes me pleased that DD had friends who’s parents were happy for her to see their children in the holidays, and that now she is 15 and parents’ attempts to interfere with friendships no longer fly.

That adults might consider her someone to avoid in the holidays on the back of where she met their children seems pretty grim to me.

I doubt it is you OP, people are just busy these days, it's not like when I was young and the majority of mums where I grew up were SAHM who could facilitate playdates.

For us personally we have only seen two of DS' school friends over the summer and that's because we are good friends with both sets of parents so it is fun for everyone to hang out. Otherwise he was at holiday camps while we were working (although to be fair a lot of his school friend's attended the same camp so he got to see a bunch of school friends there once per week); and any free time we've had has been spent as a family or seeing out of town friends who we logistically don't get to see during term time.

In terms of no reciprocal playdates, that is quite rude, although as others have said, if the friends have siblings, the parents might not be keen to host playdates where the sibling feels left out in their own home.

Lots of people are away a lot and those with siblings and cousins near by probably focus on them. It’s harder when you only have one child

I've got several primary-aged relatives. Some are in childcare for most of the summer, so parents understandably want to maximise their quality time with them at weekends. Others have had a week or two on holiday, a week or two staying with grandparents (often for childcare), lots of fun days out and activities with parents and other family, some much needed downtime, playing in the garden/street/park etc. None of them have particularly spent time with friends from school, unless they happen to be in the same childcare or club, or live on the same street - this is obviously more likely if they live near their school.

When I was a kid I just used to hang around with the kids down my street.
Doesn't seem to be as much of a thing nowadays. So many parents working and kids at holiday clubs.

I deliberately book mine into the same holiday club her mates go to once a week. It gives me a break as I don't work school holidays, and she gets to see her mates. Win win.

Two little girls in my street seemed to have had a lovely summer playing out together. They’ve been getting their toy prams out, building camps in their front gardens with sheets and chairs. It’s been so nice to watch them.

That's lovely. We live in a tiny cluster of houses in the countryside and there are families, but their parents work full time so their kids are constantly away at clubs and grandparents. Just the way of the world now.

We never did school holiday play dates as we were either working or on holiday.

There is nothing wrong with you - people are just busy.

Your DD had plenty of things to do so stop worrying about it.

We saw nct friends loads and hosted one school playdate, but otherwise saw/ were invited to nothing with people from school.

Nothing wrong with you, and nothing to do with being 2025! Sometimes people are up for hosting, sometimes not.

Maybe try and view it that if you like to host then do and just enjoy it. If you’re only doing it to get invites to others plan it in advance and work out a reciprocal arrangement that works for everyone. Nothing wrong with either option, it’s easier for some to share childcare duties, but others might go away for long periods of time or want to just spend time as a family so just go to a limited amount of play dates.

So now you are those people who never reciprocate. Wonder if you’ll stop being invited like you did to then?

You’ve chosen a very strange take on the post you commented on. The post was so normal and non challenging.
school is intense. It’s all day every day. That isn’t a bad thing but it is full on. Holidays are a great time to see people you can’t see much during term time.

Have you read the entire conversation? For some reason that poster doesn’t quote so the whole convo isn’t there.

@bumbalooI know, I just find @Ddakji very dramatic in her take on young primary school age children not seeing school friends much outside of school in school holidays…….

I'm sure it's not you or your child personally, I avoid all playdate type things as I like to forget school exists during the holidays, I thought other people were the same? I need a break from it all I find it really stressful, the last thing I want is someone else's kid to look after as well as my three, plus if one gets a friend over they all want one and my day off goes to shit! Our school holidays are 6 weeks of part-time work and kids clubs, so days off and weekends are for enjoying time together as a family that we rarely have. They see school friends all year round, why do they need to see them in the holidays too?

I agree with this. There are 39 weeks of seeing school friends every day, the holidays are a chance for a break and to see people who we don’t get the opportunity to in term time.