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Original poster

Neighbour now being off..

79 replies

pittypartay · 30/08/2025 14:38

Lived in our house 5 years now. We’re a family of 4 with primary aged kids and they’re a retired couple in their late 70s/early 80s.

When we moved in we were very pleasant to them, and they were extremely friendly back. TBH it felt a bit suffocating, and they would knock our door if they hadn’t seen us all weekend type thing. We felt they were a bit relaxed with us, telling us all the details of every aspect of their lives and in turn asking us millions of questions about ours, where we grew up, how our relationship is with our family etc, it felt intrusive.

Over time DH and I pulled away, but we’re always friendly when we needed to be. We tried to be busy but never rude type thing.
Luckily the door knocks stopped and the million questions stopped, but we still had to not give too much or they would start falling back into their old ways. It’s felt like we’ve had to manage the situation in some ways, but it was working and we have felt much more comfortable with the relationship.

However since the last couple of months (it was the man’s 80th but we didn’t know what day and didn’t really think to buy him a card or present), it seems they have really taken offence and now blank us. WWYD? We’re tempted to just accept this as it feels a bit easier but at the same time it feels a bit odd that they now don’t like us at all!

OP posts:

SomeOfTheTrouble · 01/09/2025 15:22

pittypartay · 01/09/2025 13:45

I think some people on here are missing the fact that these people were intrusive and their attention was unwanted. We didn’t buy our house because we wanted to live next door to people like them, we were hoping, as I’m sure anyone would, for neighbours who kept themselves to themselves. We’re busy people with jobs who don’t have the time for that kind of relationship. It took them ages to take the hint, to the point we had to manage them as to be honest, we knew they were overly invested in us and a bit volatile and needy. And they have proven us right by now getting shitty because we havent given the man a birthday card..
I really appreciate those that can understand this from my point of view!

I think what people are confused about is why you care, to the extent of writing a thread about it, that these intrusive, volatile and needy people are no longer talking to you? Isn’t that a win?

CrimsonStoat · 01/09/2025 19:56

I think some people on here are missing the fact that these people were intrusive and their attention was unwanted.

And now they're ignoring you, so surely that's a win?

Many of us are bewildered why you seem to be having a moan about getting what you wanted.

NewYorkSummer · 01/09/2025 20:07

Honestly, why do you care? One less neighbour to have to speak to in my opinion. When you see them smile politely and move on.

EvangelicalAboutButteredToast · 01/09/2025 20:15

We had elderly neighbours at the top of our road that we were very friendly with. Would pop in and have coffee regularly. One day the man acted like he didn’t know who I was. Wouldn’t talk to me if I saw him walking down the road I assumed he’d lapsed into a kind of dementia or something and left it. They are still living in the same place and it’s been about eight years now. He looks very frail but I never did get to the bottom of what changed.

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