Hyped-up activities that are actually shite.

[DarkestBerty]

Loads of my friends do yoga. It's really relaxing, they say. It's really mindful, they say. It's a good workout without realising you're working out, they say. It's a really nice community of people, they say.

So on Saturday morning I tried it.

It was bloody awful. Everything about it was bloody terrible. It wasn't remotely relaxing or mindful. I wasn't a very good workout and the people were cult-loke lunatics.

And I've felt a bit lightheaded, dizzy, and just not quite myself ever since.

Tell me about activities that everyone seems to have a wide-on for, but which you hated.

I forgot gender reveals

@ClaredeBear

Re spa days - I do really like them. Sorry! I just love leaving all my mumsy clothes and getting changed into a nice soft robe. The low lighting, the quiet. The facial and pedicure (I dont do massages usually and I cant stretch to a mani and a pedi at the same time). A low key swim (my children are WILD in the pool) and then a soak in the whirpool tub. Nice shower with products that smell nice. Then the relaxation room. I just lie down and read with a blanket over my legs. It's soooo quiet. I love the quiet.

I really do like them. Sorry!

I've never been on a spa day but I really want to now.

yes to yoga, pumpkin picking, secret santa, team building, Christmas party nights (but happy to go for a meal in a restaurant),
also hen parties, baby showers/gender reveals.

As Jay from the Inbetweeners once said, "why is there always a c* with a guitar?"

They always seem to be drawn to campfires, but I don't know why.

Can I add wildly expensive advent calendars, please, @Dabberlocks? I’m not going to pay a couple of hundred quid for an advent calendar!

Believe me, I've toyed with all the tactics. None work. I'm in book club forever.

But I'm going to start exiting every social situation with your last line - "Very best wishes to you all" - accompanied by a dramatic fanning of the arms and a sashaying walkout. Maybe I also need a cape to whip behind me....

I don't understand why she can't just be honest and say it's not the right group for her. There's really no need to make up an excuse.

We had to float and wave our arms back and forth. A woman behind me hissed in my ear, "you're drifting backwards!" Couldn't help it. We also had to do an exercise with pool noodles between our legs and some teenage boys in the main pool were sniggering away.

I thought exercising in water would be really low-impact and gentle, but I managed to pull a muscle at the top of my leg. It didn't hurt much, but for a few weeks afterwards, I had the weird sensation that my left leg was falling off.

🤣

So top 5 dislikes so far! This is purely from skim reading.

Yoga
Spas
Camping
Pumpkin picking
Wild swimming

getting nails done
baby showers
Gender reveals

You cancel at the last minute every time until they stop inviting you.

Yep!

It's also at weird mid-afternoon times, like 3pm so it's neither lunch nor tea, just an extra meal so I'm never hungry for it (and I can't wait until 3pm if I haven't eaten since breakfast).

Planners. Why do I need to write everything down and make it look pretty with washitape and stickers etc? Why?

Our bookgroup has disbanded, but if it restarts, I don’t fancy it. My (real) excuse will be that I am going to tackle my ‘to be read’ pile of books which is going through the roof.

I don't know, I want to leave mine too. So far I'm considering faking my own death

Just firebomb the book group? Self-sacrifice is not necessary!

Lol!

I just thought of another one - pub lunches. They always serve the same stuff, it's too stodgy for me and I always eat too much. Everything comes with chips and kids options are always the same (fish fingers, nuggets or burger, with chips and never veg). I generally like eating out though.

To be fair, a proper afternoon tea in a London hotel is more food than you can possibly eat, endless tea and champagne, along with impeccable service. You pay £100, but it's a much more luxurious and elegant experience than a couple of butties for 25 quid!

I didn’t find this at the Ritz, it was a similar amount of food as most other afternoon teas and one glass of champagne.

Well, pretty planning is much more enjoyable than actually doing anything!

Its impossible to leave book club! I did leave mine due to family commitments/issues but yes I'd spend a month reading some crappy book and then I'd miss 10 minutes and they'd stopped talking about the book and were just generally talking about something else so Id wanted to leave for a while My DC do an activity near the place they meet on the same day and a year later I'm still having to sit in my car once a month to avoid the cafe where they meet! My Dc's now warn me when it's the first Friday of the month because its now an in joke!

Christmas
Spa days
Birthday parties for adults
Anything in all-female groups
Anything advertised as "fun" which involves adults making fools of themselves

Ah, there I have to disagree. Going to the theatre is possibly my favourite thing in the entire world - I love it.