Would you go on holiday the week your child gets their A level results?

[NoNameisGoodEnough]

I'm curious what people's opinions are about this.

DD gets her A level results this week. I have had the date in the calendar for months and ensured that the day was clear. I know DD might disappear off to the pub or whatever and probably won't need us but I wanted to ensure I'd be around to celebrate / support / whatever is necessary.

Someone I know is going on holiday this week, without their 18 year old, leaving them to get their results by themselves.

To me, this seems really awful. However, DD is our only. We both work in education so can be around. It might well be that I am the weird one for being so involved! When I got mine, my mum was at work, fair enough, so I called her to tell her my results and then we went out for a meal that evening.

I just wondered if anyone else would book a holiday for the week their child gets results.

We've always asked our children if they want to be here or be on hols when we've been planning hols.
All have picked to be home.

I don't think there's a wrong or right - just what is the best for them. If there's a chance grades might be lower than expected, I'd probably want to be home to access support of career teachers, Uni system etc...

Wow @ThePhantomoftheEcobubbleOpera

Selfish arsehole?

Wow, how fucking rude.

My DD had not applied to University and did not want to go camping with us. Am I selfish arsehole for going camping a couple of hours from home in those circumstances?

Actually don’t bother answering, I need to try not to care what a stranger on the internet thinks of my parenting and my family 😔

No chance!

No, I would not.

We planned around this and will be with DS when A level results arrive on Thursday. School will send a text about 8am. He may go into school later (and to the pub for sure).

If he gets his grades there’s no issue. But he has a high offer and if he misses the grade, I want him to be able to speak to teachers and have the best advice re clearing. That would be challenging if we were away.

I remember my sister's friend getting her A level results when her parents were away. She didn't get into her preferred uni and had to go through clearing etc which she found stressful.

I wouldn't, no. I have no reason to believe DS has done badly in his A levels but you just never know. If he has to navigate clearing I'd rather be here to support him. In fact I've taken the day off just in case.

I don't think it's necessarily bad parenting though. It could just be absolute faith in your child or having a super independent child, lack of understanding of what the process might be if they don't get the grades, bit of disorganisation or whatever.

@NoNameisGoodEnough do gcse results not get delivered to the pupil's home by royal mail???

Absolutely not. DH had to battle with his ex to be flexible with the holiday dates for my step dc as we wanted to go away as a family next year but the dates she’d suggested spanned GCSE and A Level results days for my two. If she’d refused to change the dates I just wouldn’t have gone away with DH.

Absolutely not. DH had to battle with his ex to be flexible with the holiday dates for my step dc as we wanted to go away as a family next year but the dates she’d suggested spanned GCSE and A Level results days for my two. If she’d refused to change the dates I just wouldn’t have gone away with DH.

No chance for either GCSEs or A levels, we never even considered it, the dates were on the calendar for both DCs well before we started planning holidays. DD was taking a gap year after A levels last year so nothing contingent on it but she still wanted me around that day and wanted to go into college not get them online.

I wouldn't as, even when the results are not needed for the next step, I wanted to be around to congratulate/commiserate with my child.
When they are needed for the next step, I would want to be about to help progress this (although to be fair, they would also support at school).

I see this as a key time in your child's life where it's important for them to feel supported and that you care about them. A bit like going to nativities/sports days (if you can - before everyone piles on and says they would have loved to go but it was impossible).

I hadn't even considered the results when I hooked the holiday 11 months before hand. Then when mentioned I assumed we would be emailed the results or pick them up on the school comms system. (I thought the going into school was more ceremonial if that makes sense.) - in my day the results landed on your doorstep, in the morning if you were lucky or via the second post - remember that....if you weren't lucky. It definitely wasn't a massive deal.

I can't work out whether you're intending to be funny, or just haven't had a child at this stage, and are thinking back to when you were at school.

No, even if they didnt have plans that depended on the results I would want to be there to support/celebrate

But then DSDs mum (who has never taken DSD on holiday despite being wealthy) went on holiday with her new boyfriend the Easter DSD was trying to revise for her GCSEs and lefts DSD at home. Why she didn't go away the week DSD was with us I will never know (when we found out we did sort DSD coming to us for most of the week).

So the shitness of some parents will never surprise me any more

My parents were around for my O' and A' Level results. They had holidays booked on both occasions, but not till the following week. I was very grateful to have them around; as a first gen student, I had to work a lot of things out for myself, but just knowing that they were there, putting the kettle on and giving me space to use the phone and talk to the relevant people helped. I passed all my As, but with grades far short of what my UCCA (UCCA predated UCAS) offers wanted, so after a chat with someone at clearing, I went with my insurance offer - a poly in an unglamorous location, but for a course that looked really good. Everything worked out - the location grew on me and the course was indeed fab.

How do they access their results if they don't pick them up these days?

I can imagine if the young person has already got a uni place, then maybe it’s not a biggie for them. I personally didn’t, and thankfully that meant we were there to support him when he didn’t quite get the grades he wanted.

Cue a few hours of ringing around other unis, his girlfriend, his mates until he found something that suited him.

I would have been horrified to think he’d have to go through that himself. He thought he was an adult but still needed a little compassion and understanding.

Seven years later, I’m glad we were there.

You can never get that time back again.

DD1 - I didn't but not an issue as had a conservatoire place with EE offer.
DD2 - no way as had an issue with ill health during an A level paper - was taking a gap year any way so it was fine but stressful having to call uni with her deferred place due to missing grades.

I once had to step in to help the DC of a friend as parents were away, they missed their offer and rather than getting on with it and getting help from school they curled up in a ball at home. They did get their place but lost their accommodation which had an impact - if the parents had been at home to help the issue could have been dealt with sooner and the accommodation issue wouldnt have arisen.

Ours get them by email at about 11am, but most go into school at 8am to collect in person.

I thought I might be being PFB (POB?) and if I had other children to consider whether they had a holiday, I might think differently.

We were away for DC2's A level results, in full consultation with them. They were perfectly happy to get them via email. As long as you're in agreement, it shouldn't be a big deal.

No, because if they need to find a Uni from clearing the teenager might need to talk things over about choices of courses and places to study.

Yes, definitely. it's not like A level results or GCSEs even mean anything in 10 years' time.

My best friend's son is away with his mates when his A level results arrive – no one seems terribly bothered!

No, I would not have done that. Fortunately both mine got what they needed so all was well, but the ones who had to deal with clearing definitely needed parental support.