What’s the most unhinged/blatantly untrue thing you’ve been told by a health visitor?

[claudiawinklemansfringetrimmer]

Inspired by the health visitor who confidently told me yesterday that “Pom bears have more saturated fat than a Big Mac” and the ones on a birth preparation course who stated “breast fed babies are 70% more intelligent” and “they didn’t have formula in dinosaur times!” (The latter is technically true I suppose…)

'you need to take her jacket off when inside'

in a house that was 5 degrees (health visitor had obviously kept her own jacket on)

I despair at some of these comments. HV’s could be such a vital support to women at a vulnerable time in their lives, but often it seems we are let down.

I’m yet to have a positive experience myself, perhaps not as extreme as some of these examples. I was told to ‘just leave’ my newborn baby to cry, she had never heard of the concept of purple crying. My most recent experience involved a HV totally ignore my child who was trying to engage with her, and instead moan about how she didn’t want to be at work today. No health visitor I’ve had has heard of FPIES either, which is a relatively rare allergic reaction type (but undoubtedly under diagnosed) but it seems that a lot of their training is outdated and CPD isn’t encouraged.

I say this as an NHS health professional myself. I know very few women who have had positive HV experiences. How and why is this happening?

Not mine, but a friends HV asked her what she would do with unused expressed breast milk and she said, probably use it in the baby’s baths save wasting it? And the HV went on a lecture about how unsafe it was to feed baby a bottle in the bath 😂😂😂

I had the most fantastic health visitor when I was suffering from PND after the birth of DS1 29 years ago. I honestly think she saved my life.

I did have a batshit midwife leading our NHS ante-natal classes. She told us to drink Guinness when breastfeeding as it has lots of iron in it.

oh my own example, after calling them to review my DD who still wasn’t walking at 2, the HV finally came, completely ignored my DD and said to me ‘oh, she’s fine, you should see some of the children I visit’

Completely unhelpful, not relevant to my own DD and I felt so bad for the children she was referring to as ‘bad’ developers.

ETA - DD was later diagnosed with a rare genetic disorder affecting global development, no thanks to the HV.

HVs, MILs, dogs, all in the same hated category on Mumsnet.

I warn anyone who reads this thread to take most of it with a massive salad sorry pinch of salt.

That I needed to frequently hand express or I’d get mastitis. From a male health visitor who seemed to seriously lack expertise in breastfeeding.

"You need to breastfeed your baby until they are 2 years old."

@Wentoverthehill Why are you so dismissive of women’s experiences?

I hated my HV. She was a right misery, and spent the time moaning about herself. Although i do remember one memorable visit when she noticed a new sheepskin rug (the shorn, washable ones specifically sold for babies) and told me my baby would die if i used it!

ok ill bite. it’s almost impossible for a HV to be 22. nurse training is 3 years from age 18. the SCPHN (HV course) training is a year full time. it is beyond unlikely for a newly qualified nurse with no post qualification experience as a registered nurse to be accepted for HV training.

I believe standards vary enormously and that the experiences upthread are true.
However, just a shout-out for the decent HVs out there - mine was fantastic. I’d had an awful birth experience I won’t go into here, but when I was home and the HV came round I was incredibly rude to her. Told her she could check baby DS as otherwise I’d probably be put on some ‘register’ and I’d be stuck with twice weekly visits from busybodies who couldn’t care less about me, being just a human incubator (PTSD, terrible birth experience and long hospital stay). Well, she did check him, then she sat me down, talked to me about PND, agreed it was most likely a reaction to what she agreed sounded like a horrible time with less than optimum care and said she was very much there for me as well as DS.
She was just brilliant! At one follow up visit she mentioned she’d seen me out for a walk when it was snowing and I got quite defensive, but she laughed and said “I’m not criticising you, I think it’s great you got him wrapped up nice and warm and took yourselves out!”.
I met her years later at a work colleague’s party and she remembered me. Was genuinely interested how we’d been and very glad I’d worked through the birth trauma. She was older, with a lot of experience in nursing and I think that helps.

@Campingisnexttogodliness

I was told the same by my HV. I repeated this incredulously to my GP who said he’d have a word.

My worst experience with a HV was a week or two after my 4th child had been born. She had mild ( very mild) jaundice like her 3 siblings before her. Lots of breastfeeding sorts it out. and lying them in front of a sunny window.

No, I apparently had to take her that day to the nearest hospital that was over 2 hours journey by public transport in the heavy snow. I had to go by train and bus as I’d had a c section. It was imperative I went that very moment as my child was in dire need. This was delivered in a very horrible manner. In my sleep deprived, hormonal state I believed her. I asked if I could the next day as my DH was home and could take us? Nope. Today.
It took over 3 hours due to the snow, and when we got to the hospital they saw me for precisely 10 minutes and told me to breastfeed frequently and to put her in the sun!

Luckily my DH had finished work (in the hospital I was in!) and brought us both home. She didn’t come to our house again.

I must have been lucky my HV (I had the same one for both my DCS) was lovely. She was very supportive, verbally slapped down the GP who accused of lying about breastfeeding, used to pop in to see ME when she could as she knew I had no family visiting.

I have heard some horror stories from friends though, luck of the draw I guess.

Mines a bit of a sad story really. I had an older health visitor who said she was due to retire in the next few months and I was one of the last few cases she was taking on. I was only 19 at the time and a single parent since pregnancy and was definitely suffering from PND. I saw her about 4 times and her behaviour just became more increasingly odd over each visit. She didn't ask anything about me or my baby and just waffled on about really weird unhinged things. The time in particular I remember vividly was she spent the entire visit talking about victorian plumbing systems and toilets. Fuck knows how she even got herself onto that topic. She just waffled on for 40 minutes and I couldnt get a word in edgeways. I was pretty gobsmacked and it was clear there was something not right with her but I didn't think to report it to anybody. Anyway I saw her in the street about 9 months after she said she was going to retire and she was clearly somebody in the throes of dementia. She wasn't wearing any shoes and just looked completely out of it. I felt incredibly sorry for her obviously but also cant believe that somebody clearly so unfit to practice was allowed to carry on working in a job like that. Luckily with my 2nd child I had a wonderful health visitor

I had one call my baby a 'difficult baby who i need to keep on top of so he doesnt become a spoilt brat'. He was 4 weeks old and screaming because she'd turned up at our house unexpected, while he was asleep, woke him up and insisted on stripping him asked and putting him on cold scales to weigh him.

I stupidly didn't do anything about her because he was my first and I was a youngish mum who feared 'authority'.

Yes I was told that too! I was also told to drink red wine. How utterly ridiculous.

When my youngest son was a baby, 19 years ago, he had a small red birthmark on his scalp which had been there since birth. The midwife had seen it, the health visitor had seen it. My son was doing well as had my other two children, no concerns ever raised from me or any health professionals.

On one visit to see us our health visitor asked if I had burned his head with a cigarette!

When my Mum had me, they actually brought Guiness round on the post natal ward for the breast-feeding mothers...

Mine was absolutely brilliant, except she did say that we were pronouncing DD’s name wrong.

Our HV team had a weaning expert. She told me that jars of baby food are full of preservatives. I said there were none listed on the ingredients, but she said they must be in there or the food would go off. She seemed to be unaware of other methods of preserving food.

She also told me that first foods must contain lumps. Any food that wasn't completely smooth made my DD gag and throw up the entire contents of her stomach, so any milk she'd had, along with the little bit of lumpy baby food. Apparently I was meant to just carry on with the lumpy food and clear up multiple pools of baby vomit each day.

We had just come home from 3 weeks in NICU. Son had a brain injury at birth so was already on the lower end of weight due to being intubated for 10 days and fed via NG for 2 weeks. She weighed him ON CARPET and then said she would have to call the consultant so we could be sent back in. We were livid at her sheer incompetence. Refused to have her back. Saw another one a couple of times who was lovely but refused visits after that as just didn't trust anything they said.

I always feel a little sad reading these threads, as a health care professional myself (although not a health visitor!) I do feel that most of us in this line of work are doing our very best. If any health visitors are reading this they must feel very disheartened. I'm not doubting that some people have had bad experiences, but in the interests of balance I would like to say that my health visitor was absolutely brilliant, and I was very grateful for the care and support she gave me.

Nothing baby/health related as I never asked her anything, as she talked to me like I was slightly mentally lacking in a voice which made her seem like she was really thick which I assume was her default and she also called me mummy and my husband daddy. I wasn't used to being talked to like that and she had my file on her knee so why she couldn't call me Mrs x or my fist name I have no idea. She was obsessed about making sure I was claiming the benefits I was entitled to - I had to tell her repeatedly that I was not entitled to any means tested benefits. She also seemed convinced that the pnd questionnaire was infallible and would detect a whiff of depression.

My midwife was very no nonsense and talked to me normally so it was all very odd.

that if I don’t feed my 6 month old cauliflower cheese she will become obese -
referred to as CC she was obsessed with it - this was in the village hall so we
all 5 mums stopped attending
sign on the door saying ‘clinic withdrawn through lack of interest’

I had one HV I told not to come to my house again and complained to our GP
Why do they speak to new mums as though we are feeble minded? rhetorical question!

My midwife visitors were lovely.