What’s the most unhinged/blatantly untrue thing you’ve been told by a health visitor?

[claudiawinklemansfringetrimmer]

Inspired by the health visitor who confidently told me yesterday that “Pom bears have more saturated fat than a Big Mac” and the ones on a birth preparation course who stated “breast fed babies are 70% more intelligent” and “they didn’t have formula in dinosaur times!” (The latter is technically true I suppose…)

My favourite bit of HV maddness was that Irish woman don't get postnatal depression as we eat oily fish.

She also told my neighbour that her moses basket was dangerous and baby would be better off in a travel cot.

Yes… I know. I was kidding. It was a joke about what the HV seemed to think was happening in “dinosaur times”.

One told me that the WHO weaning guidelines were ‘really for African babies’ after I queried her advice to start weaning at 4 months because that would help dd sleep longer. It didn’t.

When on a visit to see dd2, told me there was something very wrong with dd1 because when she asked dd1 if she liked princesses she said no. She wasn’t joking either. Told me I “needed to keep an eye on that”. WTAF.

Then told me that “legally” I had to attend a weaning class. I asked her to clarify what she meant by “legally”. Obviously she couldn’t but carried on. I asked her if the weaning guidelines had changed at all in the past three years and I got the “legally” spiel again. The student HV - who did seem to have her head screwed on - with her confirmed they hadn’t.

The best part of this visit though was when she told me that as I wasn’t breastfeeding (I tried!) I needed to get some make up on and go out for the evening. I was feeling awful enough about that - especially as a midwife told me that formula feeding was akin to giving baby McDonald’s and why would any decent parent do that - but I was wearing make up at the time.

I phoned and told them the woman was no longer welcome in my house and why.

I am pretty sure the post you are replying to was a joke.

I have had nothing as bad as these stories but I found mine very patronising and dismissive of my DS’ symptoms and slowed down the process of getting a CMPA diagnosis. She repeatedly gave me information that was factually incorrect.

Even after the paediatrician confirmed CMPA, HV was very sceptical until one day she said “maybe he does have CMPA you know!” and then claimed I was so lucky I’d had her support during all of this.

I know HVs get bashed a lot on MN but I also think that it should be more important that they are well trained and up to date. There’s a reason these threads fill up with these kinds of stories. They might mean well but they’re often the first and only port of call (in fact mine used to get offended if I went to the GP instead of her). It should be a big deal when advice given is bad, damaging and inconsistent with official NHS advice.

My second HV wasn’t as bad but also had a lot of outdated ideas about autism which was concerning as she was the person doing the referral for the assessment.

It would be understandable if we were talking about obscure issues that they wouldn’t come across often but on these threads people are being told outrageous things regarding topics that must come up daily for HV like breastfeeding, formula, reflux, weaning etc.

I must have been lucky then as mine were brilliant, took time to answer what now seem like trivial questions which seemed so important at the time, lots of help with BF, never patronised or made me feel silly. I bumped into one of them again recently (DCs are young adults now) and she still remembered us.

Mine told me she didn’t believe in vitamins, and asked me, “Have you ever seen a vitamin?” I was tempted to reply that I’d never seen the Kremlin, but that I had no reason to disbelieve in its existence…

I doubt anyone can top this. I was changing my baby boys nappy who was around 1 at the time. I made some stupid comment about how I didn't realise that they could have erections so young. She looked horrified and told me that wasn't normal and had we been watching porn?
I've never watched it, I was a single mum so no one else had either but that's by the by as I know now it is entirely fucking normal. She was horrible (and stupid).

That if I wanted my 4th centile baby to get fatter that I needed to 'bake cakes' for her. She was 6 months old. The baby that is. The HV had the intellect a 6nth old to be fair.

I only asked her advice because I was working full time , exhausted and I wanted to check that my tiny dd was thriving. She was.

She got VERY short shrift from me in return and I told her not to be so ridiculous. She never came again 😂😂😂

Actually, smoking does seem to protect against developing ulcerative colitis (a type of bowel disease). The numerous other associated risks means it isn’t recommended however!

www.webmd.com/ibd-crohns-disease/ulcerative-colitis/uc-smoking-the-link

32 years ago a HV walked into my house , took one look at my baby and asked if I’d had a test for Down’s

Which I hadn’t
As a young first time parent , I was so shocked and upset that my baby may have a condition not recognised , cried for days till GP told me to stop , she was fine .

That I shouldn’t keep my DD in babygro’s as she wouldn’t know when it was night and when it was day. Okaaaaaay.

Absolutely ridiculous. In a similar vein, I had an actual doctor witness ds in the throes of an autistic meltdown, head butting the corner of a radiator and really hurting himself. He looked shocked and turned to me and said “I’ve seen children like this before. They grow up to be sexual predators”. WTAF

I had a HV come round when dd had colic. She was advising me of foods to avoid as I was BFing. She said “There are certain curry spices you shouldn’t eat, I don’t know which ones”, then looked at my Asian DH and said confidently “You’ll know”.

I was speechless. (Ex)DH was adopted and raised in a white family. He didn’t even like curry, and certainly knew absolutely zero about breastfeeding.

@Catgotyourbrain

I told my health visitor that my baby would eat and eat and had no full point. My health visitor told me it was impossible to over feed my baby. They would simply stop when they were full.

I have felt guilty for listening to that and not using my common sense for 25 years.

My child was diagnosed with autism when they were 13. In all the years since I have never heard that some cannot recognise the full feeling.

I'm grateful for your post. Thankyou.

Not to be relied on. Ask me how I know.

Smoking definitely helps me go to the toilet 😬

When my DS was 21 months that I'd delayed his speech by allowing a bottle before bed and a dummy for sleep🙄 I've got no time for them anymore.

They're obviously never good for you but I have a vague memory that something in them can relieve IBS symptoms.

Don’t use baby oil (I wasn’t going to). It leaches their vitamins. Use olive oil. (My mother, ex-midwife, muttered “and a nice sprinkling of oregano”.)

That I needed to start the Milk Ladder at home with my son because he’ll never outgrown his cows milk protein allergy otherwise……

My DS’s allergy is anaphylactic. He’s been under the care of an allergy specialist and a paediatric dietician for most of his life, and based on his test results, it’s unlikely that he will ever outgrow his allergy. We have always been advised by them never to attempt at home, but to do it in hospital under controlled conditions with emergency care immediately available.

Told to put olive oil on my son’s cradle cap. NHS website says DON’T do this.

hv told trainee hv not to wash hands before touching my new born...off you pop

Excuse me WHAT??? That is insane.