Page 4 | Tell me about the mum's you have to put up with in your child's year

LegalllyBrunette · 2025-08-03T19:45:03+00:00

I was watching Motherland today and couldn't help but think about the mums and dads I encounter on the school run and their idiosyncrasies. I wouldn't say there are any clear Julias or Amandas but there are definitely characters, some I try to avoid, and I'm just wondering what the dynamics are near you I'll have to find a colourful way the ones I know

ImGoingUpstairsToTakeOffMyHat · 23/08/2025 18:00

CurlewKate · 05/08/2025 13:50

I don’t have to “put up” with any of them. They are all just women like me-I like some, don’t like others, and am indifferent to some more. Just like women at work, at an evening class or at the gym. Can’t bear this strange “school mums are a different species” thing.

This.

I remember a MN thread a few years ago when someone came on to complain about school mum who made the effort and wore make up for the school run, and she just wore joggers and thought it was weird people dressed up to drop off their kids.

Cue 20 posts of agreement before someone said “Maybe they’re going to work?” 🤣

Original poster

LegalllyBrunette · 23/08/2025 18:43

ImGoingUpstairsToTakeOffMyHat · 23/08/2025 17:52

I honestly don’t know what some people’s problem is with making friends or talking to other mums. They aren’t the enemy - you’ll find they’re just like you. The competitive “I hate school mums the most” is just as tiresome, if not more tiresome than the so-called “queen bees” (who I’m not actually sure exist they’re just women who have chats and make the effort). Some of the best friendships I have were created at the school gates. And if nothing else, it means play dates are more bearable if you’re with someone who you like as well.

But to answer the OP, my DS’s current school has good mums - just one who keeps telling everyone she’s vegan is a bit annoying. But in his old school there was a mum whose whole personality seemed to be “My kids don’t like sugary things”. She was very smug proud that they didn’t like anything with sugar and mentioned it constantly. Until when it was my DD’s birthday, we had it at a trampoline place and as birthday girl she got a free giant slushier. She doesn’t actually like them so offered it to her friends. The boy who apparently didn’t like sugar grabbed it, practically inhaled it and you could almost see swirls in his eyes. Watching his mum vault across a trampoline park cafe shouting “No Nicholas! No! You don’t even LIKE sugary things!” As she tried (and largely failed) to grab the slushie off him, was very amusing. Especially when he spent the rest of the party begging her for another one

It's really not about hating other mums and I have some lovely mum friends. It's more that there are some I don't find it as eats to tolerate and we are definitely not friends, it don't dislike each other, it's just a bit like you have colleagues who you might not be friends with but you know one another quite well as you see one another regularly!

the one thinking you fancy her husband is hilarious!

OP posts:

Cormoransjacket · 23/08/2025 19:02

On the my youngest son's first day of year 1 I spotted a new boy and his Mum in the playground. I struck up a conversation to try to be welcoming. The Mum turned out to be one of the kindest, most generous and lovely people I have ever met. Our sons are starting year 8 next month and they are still best friends.

I was quite a young Mum when I had my eldest and he has some SN. Another Mum with a son who has SN spotted how much I was struggling. She invited me to her house and introduced me to lots of other Mums. It helped so much to trade experiences and stories with other Mums. I felt much less alone and scared after that.

ImGoingUpstairsToTakeOffMyHat · 23/08/2025 19:03

LegalllyBrunette · 23/08/2025 18:43

It's really not about hating other mums and I have some lovely mum friends. It's more that there are some I don't find it as eats to tolerate and we are definitely not friends, it don't dislike each other, it's just a bit like you have colleagues who you might not be friends with but you know one another quite well as you see one another regularly!

the one thinking you fancy her husband is hilarious!

Show quote history

Oh not having a go at you at all OP it’s a good thread as not all mums are actually great and there are funny stories (the same way people can share colleague funny stories)! It’s the moany responses you’ve had on the thread that I can’t bear.

butterdish93 · 23/08/2025 19:26

As far as I can tell, there’s no playground politics. I like them all. And have quite a few good friends amongst them. In all my children’s year groups.

Original poster

LegalllyBrunette · 23/08/2025 20:26

Cormoransjacket · 23/08/2025 19:02

On the my youngest son's first day of year 1 I spotted a new boy and his Mum in the playground. I struck up a conversation to try to be welcoming. The Mum turned out to be one of the kindest, most generous and lovely people I have ever met. Our sons are starting year 8 next month and they are still best friends.

I was quite a young Mum when I had my eldest and he has some SN. Another Mum with a son who has SN spotted how much I was struggling. She invited me to her house and introduced me to lots of other Mums. It helped so much to trade experiences and stories with other Mums. I felt much less alone and scared after that.

That's lovely

OP posts:

Ncforthiscms · 23/08/2025 20:48

Ilovelurchers · 05/08/2025 09:10

My husband had an affair with one of the school moms! (At least one - there may have been more). He is still with her now. Cheating on her left, right and centre of course. (He is a great dad but a terrible partner).

This has kind of coloured my experience of them.

My ex did this too and both parents walled away from their kids. So for about a year I'd feel the nudges as I waited outside dc classroom - then covid hhappened and everyone forgot.
The 1 mum who drove us all mad was the one who would put on the class wattsapp 'can anyone grab little felicity for me...running late'
The day I answered with after school club info was the day people stopped saying yes I can.
🤣

Original poster

LegalllyBrunette · 24/08/2025 09:34

Ilovelurchers · 05/08/2025 09:10

My husband had an affair with one of the school moms! (At least one - there may have been more). He is still with her now. Cheating on her left, right and centre of course. (He is a great dad but a terrible partner).

This has kind of coloured my experience of them.

I missed some of the comments

I'm sorry for this and hope you're better off,
sounds like you are!

OP posts:

Original poster

LegalllyBrunette · 24/08/2025 09:37

Ncforthiscms · 23/08/2025 20:48

My ex did this too and both parents walled away from their kids. So for about a year I'd feel the nudges as I waited outside dc classroom - then covid hhappened and everyone forgot.
The 1 mum who drove us all mad was the one who would put on the class wattsapp 'can anyone grab little felicity for me...running late'
The day I answered with after school club info was the day people stopped saying yes I can.
🤣

Show quote history

We have one who often asks for help with the DC, drop off or pick up to school or clubs. We had to be quite firm for them to stop asking. Even just yesterday she was asking if we could help each other out with drop offs and picks ups but, not only do we not need the help as much as we have one child and flexibility with work, but the more we have done for them the more they ask. Last time we agreed to pick up for them their dad arrived at nearly 7 pm to pick them up without saying he was running late!

OP posts:

ItalianRedParka · 24/08/2025 09:56

Wow this thread is a good un. One whose son was friendly with mine but did nothing but distract him. Sorry but he's really rough and strangled my son infront of me ! He's got issues but his mother just stands there. Mother used to text me every day. I just started ignoring it. I cant be arsed.

ItalianRedParka · 24/08/2025 09:57

Also this mother told her son i don't text her back. He told my son who told me. I nearly wet myself.

Timeforabitofpeace · 24/08/2025 10:14

The only one I took a real dislike to was a woman who was the wife of a headteacher and she was bossy, patronising and rude. She seemed to feel entitled to endlessly tell the rest of what to do.

Then there was the nut job who sent my 12 year old home from a sleepover on his own at midnight because “he wanted to come home”. He never went again.

BayOfBucket · 24/08/2025 15:44

Awww. I love most of the other mums in my DD’s class - they’re such a nice bunch. We’re quite varied in terms of age and occupation but we all get on well and there aren’t any politics or bitchy behaviours that I’ve seen. I’m glad to have met them.