And so the deceit from dcs childhood catches up with me....

[Caughtinmyweboflies]

What started as an innocent conversation has turned into a confession session, and my 21yo is shocked.

We were talking about a band he listened to as a kid (JLS if you're interested), and it came about that I told him when he was maybe 5 or 6 that their names were Aston, JB, Colin and Jeff (couldn't remember the other 2s names) and he just never questioned it for all these years.

As the conversation went on I had to confess to a multitude of things like dropping cool metal things ahead of him when he was out with his metal detector, he thought he was just really lucky, he thought he saw a meteor hit earth when he was about 8, they were doing a thing at school where an 'alien' crashed into earth and they did a whole term around teaching the alien stuff, so the night before I stood outside his bedroom window with a stereo and a flashlight, and he saw and heard this meteor and just never questioned it.

All in all I had to confess to maybe 10 things that I did to make his childhood magical and he is shook.

He's very clever, at uni, paying his own way by working full time, own flat etc, but he just never really questioned anything (also autistic and takes everything at face value as we have learned in the last few years).

I'm sitting here wracking my brains to other stuff I have done now.

(Lighthearted, he is actually very grateful and thanked me then got a bit teary, after he told me off 🤣)

Anyone else had innocent lies catch up with them?

I was told it was chocolate as I wouldn’t eat it.

Omg I was awful for fiddling with my belly button when I was about 5. My mother told me about the child who did that and they unravelled their body out like a bedsheet the Drs couldn't tie it up again so the child died.

The circumstances of my birth was decidedly dodgy. I never questioned it till mid teens when my friends who were wiser talked about their mum having a new baby and I asked how long did the forms take. Mummy and Daddy decided to have a baby. So they sent off the forms to have a baby and later that year they got a phone call one afternoon to tell them their baby had arrived in a hospital crib with my name, address and telephone number around a tag on my wrist. They were very surprised so they went to the hospital and took me home. This makes it sound like I could be adopted, I'm definitely not.

I've remembered some more! I used to tell the kids that Robins were employed by Santa (hence the red breasts) to watch their behaviour. He took on extra staff at Christmas, hence there were more of them. We walked round the park every day with the dogs, and any bad behaviour was quickly nipped in the bud at the sight of a Robin!
My uncle told my cousin if you planted a feather in the garden, it would grow into a hen! He did, and when he finally stopped checking my uncle took the feather away and left an egg! I don't know what age my cousin was when he stopped believing the hen had laid an egg and run off! His garden was beset with feathers for a good few months.
My ds had a sudden fear of werewolves, so we told him his papa was one! He believed that he roamed the woods at the full moon!
There were fairies in the woods, but grown ups can't hear them, only children. I used to make little giggly noises, and the dc would shout "I can hear the fairies!" and I'd tell them they were talking nonsense. "But you can't hear them!!!"
I had such fun with them!

I used to tell my kids the Robins were Santa's spies too. Whenever we'd spot one, at any time of the year, I'd say they were checking their behaviour. I wouldn't just say it if they were misbehaving, I'd say it all the time. They're adults now and I still say it sometimes.

When there was some building work going on near us the big crane used to "talk" to my then 4 year old DTs. They'd have a lovely conversation with the crane, that was really me talking in a dodgy cockney accent. Sometimes I send them photos of cranes and say it's their friend.

I realised when they started primary school that I'd never called their toes toes, I still used the baby word for them, which was what my oldest had called them. I had to quickly correct them one day on the way home from school when they spoke about their toes using the wrong word.

If I had a food I wanted to eat myself I'd say it had nuts in as none of them like nuts.

Late 60s. My Auntie would host Christmas dinner every year, all the family would be there. My uncle was a vet with a radio setup to contact him for call outs. Unfortunately the radio would crackle into life about 3 o'clock after dinner was finished and someone would have a mare with trouble foaling. Off he would go. 5 minutes later there was a big knocking on the door and, lo and behold, it was Santy! He'd hand out presents, have a glass of whiskey then wish us a merry Christmas and be gone. Shortly after my uncle would return and we'd all be telling him with great excitement what happened. He was always so fed up to have missed it all.

We did the same after DSspendung hours looking for one

My son was about 4 and had heard about 'swear words' and kept badgering is to teach him one. So we told him 'termites' was a swear word and used it a few times around him when stubbing a toe etc. Then a few months later he was watching a David Attenborough documentary...

I washed my sons pikachu toy and left him to dry on the radiator overnight which melted his eyes and singed his bottom so I sent him to pikachu hospital to be repaired and returned (via Amazon) I still have mild guilt

Now that made me tear up.

You are right, it isn't lies it is love, there isn't much magic when you grow up- childhood should be full of it.

I've remembered some more! I used to tell the kids that Robins were employed by Santa (hence the red breasts) to watch their behaviour. He took on extra staff at Christmas, hence there were more of them

@ThePlatypusAlwaysTriumphs this is genius 🤣

My nephew was about 4 at the time and was living with us for a short period of time due to complicated factors at home. As a typical 4 year old, he was awful for going to the toilet and not washing his hands afterwards. I told him that if he didn't wash the willy germs off his hands afterwards, his fingers would turn into willies and become willy fingers. He didn't believe me at first so when he asked my husband, he played along (naturally!). The occasional reminder of "willy fingers!" would prompt him to wash them.

Fast forward 4 years, my son is a similar age and I recently overheard my now 9 year old nephew very seriously telling me son about the dangers of willy fingers 😆 They both have very good post toilet hand hygiene now though!

I found out the other week that my childhood bunny and sister's guinea pig did not run off together holding paws to get married; they were eaten by a fox. My mum forget she told us that!

For years my mum told me my uncle played Manuel in Fawlty Towers back in the day and Andrew Sachs was his stage name. She told me this in the 1990’s as Sachs is the double of my uncle. I believed it for years and told people as a teenager - I was about 15 and my mum couldn’t believe I still thought it was true 😂

I've laughed so hard I've got tears rolling down my face...

I told my DS that spiders went to bed at 6 o'clock, he believed that until he was in his teens, bless him.

My brother and I had two sweet little rabbits who lived in a hutch in our shed. As we got older the attraction wore off and one day the hutch was empty.
My uncle was a teacher and mum told us that the rabbits had gone to live at his school so that the children could enjoy them.
I discovered IN MY 50s that my uncle had taken them but they’d gone straight in the pot.
I feel guilty to this day and am teary writing this.
IDK if lying to your children was more common in the 60s and 70s but this was one of several I remember that still upset me now.
I made a conscious decision not to lie to my kids and, with the exception of the tooth fairy and Santa, think I succeeded. (Rushes off to ask grown up children…..)

Your 21 year old got teary because you told him some incorrect names of JLS band members when he was a child? I can’t tell if this is a joke or not.

I've been laughing at these all morning, the stuff we do for our kids is hilarious, and the lies we make up on the spot as well 🤣

@ADRV no, he got teary because he realised how much effort I put into making magic for him throughout his childhood.

Erm … is that not true? 😂🙈🙈🙈

🤣 goldfish don't get pregnant, they lay eggs.

I only know this because I googled it maybe 10 years ago because I believed it too.

Omg I even know this. So how have I still believed it?!
who’s the twat now? 😂😂😂😂😂

Oh dear - when first we practice to deceive, etc.! 😆

When DD was about 7 she caught us delivering her stocking in the middle of Christmas night 2020; and, realising that this meant that FC didn’t exist, went into full blown hysterics. She was so distressed that we quickly came up with the excuse that FC had to leave the stockings outside for us to do that year because of social distancing, and wasn’t allowed to come in the house because he wasn’t in our bubble. She seemed to buy it, but clearly only because she really didn’t want the alternative explanation to be true.

She did go back to believing, but was always a bit suspicious after that, until she finally asked me outright if he was real the summer she was about 9, and I said no (I was quite relieved to give up on the pretence at that point). But I’m always quite sad about her catching us in the act; I’d asked DP to do the final bit and he was bloody useless at putting it quietly in her room and he wanted to go to bed so wasn’t very careful. I should just have done it myself 😬

Wish I'd thought of this when my (now 18 year old) granddaughter was little! Our local shopping mall had 5 or 6 of the damn things dotted around,and after letting DGD go on one when she was 3 years old,we could not walk past one without her having a paddy if we didn't let her go on it. Our shopping trips became a military operation in trying to navigate the shops without having to pass one of them!

Jesus could you not control yourself with kids in the house!

My dad told us his oilskin jacket was made from the skins of little oils. My brothers were young enough to believe him and I was old enough to know not to say anything. Last week I was on holiday with them all and I tried it on my youngest brother after seeing one outside an antique shop. He bought it. My mum told him the truth just after, though, heinous crime. He was too little the first time around to remember the original poor little oils who all died to make one coat. He's in his 30s now though, he should know better. 😆