And so the deceit from dcs childhood catches up with me....

[Caughtinmyweboflies]

What started as an innocent conversation has turned into a confession session, and my 21yo is shocked.

We were talking about a band he listened to as a kid (JLS if you're interested), and it came about that I told him when he was maybe 5 or 6 that their names were Aston, JB, Colin and Jeff (couldn't remember the other 2s names) and he just never questioned it for all these years.

As the conversation went on I had to confess to a multitude of things like dropping cool metal things ahead of him when he was out with his metal detector, he thought he was just really lucky, he thought he saw a meteor hit earth when he was about 8, they were doing a thing at school where an 'alien' crashed into earth and they did a whole term around teaching the alien stuff, so the night before I stood outside his bedroom window with a stereo and a flashlight, and he saw and heard this meteor and just never questioned it.

All in all I had to confess to maybe 10 things that I did to make his childhood magical and he is shook.

He's very clever, at uni, paying his own way by working full time, own flat etc, but he just never really questioned anything (also autistic and takes everything at face value as we have learned in the last few years).

I'm sitting here wracking my brains to other stuff I have done now.

(Lighthearted, he is actually very grateful and thanked me then got a bit teary, after he told me off 🤣)

Anyone else had innocent lies catch up with them?

Told my then 6 year old that all kids go to school by order of the Queen, who sends the palace guards out to find any missing school children. Was a bit sticky when the Queen died, but have managed to convince her old Charlie boy has the same rules. Also told her Boris Johnson was PM (true), but she laughed and said that couldn’t possibly be how the country was run.

When Dd was a toddler, she was fascinated with newborn babies. She asked me why they were wrapped up (swaddled) once.

I must have been really tired and didn’t want to go into swaddling explanations so I said that was how they were wrapped until they grew their arms and legs.

When she was 7, she said something that made me realise she still believed this. I had to fess up and she was not impressed.

The tooth fairy used to leave notes and tiny little bottles of pixie dust (glitter) for my kids.

One day, I'd spent all day deep cleaning the house. Bathed eldest child and then bathed the next one.

Came out of the bathroom to find eldest child aged about 6 pouring 'pixie dust' over her head. The glitter was everywhere! And it took weeks to get it out of her hair.

Her reason for doing it was because she thought the 'pixie dust' would help her fly, just like Tinkerbell.

I smiled through gritted teeth and told her that she would need 100's of bottles of pixie dust to make her fly as she was much bigger than a fairy...

Over 10 years later, I was reminiscing about it with her and she had no idea that it wasn't real pixie dust or how I was holding my frustration inside at the glitter all over the floor when I'd spent all day scrubbing the house from top to bottom. 😁 I can laugh about it now and it's one of my favourite memories. 💕

My mum told me the cats eyes in the middle of the road were real eyes from real cats! I believed her for years!

When I was little, my grandfather told me tales.
”When I 12, I hopped on a train and came to California from Virginia.”
”I got chased by a bear in Montana…”
”See that rock over there in that roaring river? I saved a drowning man once.”
“They called me ‘No Shoes’ in the war, because I was in charge of shoes and there weren’t any.”
And I’d lie in bed and thlnk about all those tales and my imagination wandered into the world.
And that’s exactly what what my grandfather wanted, I think, now that I’m his age and he’s been gone for 50 years.

I didn't generally make stuff up beyond FC and the tooth fairy. Probably as it pissed me off so much as a kid when my parents or older relatives made stuff up on the spot instead of tell the truth in an age appropriate way. I revelled and shared in the childhood wonder at the world with DDs and tried to fire their imaginations without out and out deception.

Those fans on top of buses - my parents told us they were to stop helicopters landing on top of the bus 😂 I didn't really take it in/didn't care but DB thought that's what they were until he was about 21 😂

After one ghastly trip to Legoland I said it was closed whilst they cleaned every single model piece.by.piece.

Our topic at school was the weather and my friend's stepmum was driving us somewhere and used the windscreen wash spray. My car didn't have that feature so i had never encountered it before. She told me it was one of those special clouds that just rains in one place. I proudly went to school the next day and told my teacher all about it.

Mine and my brothers goldfish died near to Christmas so my dad told us robbers stole them (and only them!) 🙈

When we forgot we told the kids that the tooth fairy only takes really clean teeth so it must not have passed the grade to be collected. We scrubbed it and it was taken the next night

I told mine that when the CBBies bedtime song finished, all the children in the world go to bed. They were high needs kids and it bought me a calm start to bedtime, at least. After that, nothing was guaranteed but we made it quietly up the stairs and into pjs at least.

Thats a brilliant post OP 😂

I also have an autistic child - he’s just reached the point becoming very verbal and asking lots of questions - very hard to keep up! Keeping him interested in the real world and focused on things other than screen is such a challenge so I’m always looking for ways to pique his interest in weird ways. Letting him discover things for himself, often by planting stuff ahead of time, is very familiar!

Jesus

My mum told me that birds have rubber feet, which is why they could sit on power lines 😫

I used to take a large gold (plastic) pirate coin on walks with us and make it appear at random places along the way. They just could not figure out how this was happening. the we in wonder that this coin would turn up on posts and bushes and even in their shoes or pockets. Then I had an age-gap baby and did the same thing for her. My older two could not believe how dumb they had been to fall for my (quite frankly awful) sleight of hand. They enjoyed being on the other side of the deceit too!

Along the ice cream van theme, I used to tell mine that if those ride on things, that they used to have in supermarkets, were playing music and flashing, they were broken.

This is so wholesome

My dad told me that mountain sheep have 2 shorter legs on one side, to enable them to walk across the mountains, on a slant.

Then a clever friend of mine worked out that they would only ever be able to go one way and would be unable to turn around and return.

Some of these are hilarious 🤣 LOVE the anti monster powder idea!

The ruse I remember using was telling the DC to come in from the garden.

It would be dark, cold, and time for supper. They loved it out there. It was an uphill battle with me yelling into the gloom….so I came up with

“You know the Goblins are waking up”

We were well into the Noddy stories at that point.
Worked a treat. They were both in the house, kicking off their wellies demanding food.

I actually felt quite bad for doing this. Worried it would backfire when I put them to bed, but they were obviously very sure that the Goblins would stay outside.

Phew 😮‍💨

My son went on a water sports, activity holiday abroad with school. The instructors convinced the group that they could heat the lake up, which is why it was so warm. They believed them.

These were year eight students!

Over ten years later, we still joke about it.

Not me but one of my children told the dinner ladies at school that he was allergic to whatever he didn't want to eat at school dinners. This was a long time ago and it took about three months for school to ask me to go in and talk about his "allergies". He didn't and never has been allergic to anything, well other than not getting his own way.

I don't know quite when we are going to have to confess, but my granddaughter has always said she doesn't like lamb.

So I told her once that it wasn't lamb, but it was a very rare breed of brown chicken, which only lives in Scotland (I am Scottish), and is very very expensive, and can only be found very occasionally in a specialist butcher. (Omg, just lie upon lie, now Ivecwritten it down.)

She loved brown chicken, and cleared the plate every time.

She's 14 now. The lie began when she was about six.

Either she's just very trusting, or she has worked it out and is now stringing us along (which I think is very likely) 😂

My DC spend hours trying to attract a pet Griffin 🙄.

I told them that I had one as a child ...
Honestly it got them outside for long walks, because Griffin's are shy animals and need a child to help them find their around towns and villages!

I told my daughter that teachers have a third eye put in the back of their head so they can see what children behind them were doing. I was a teacher so could use my third eye at home. When she started school and asked her teachers about the third eye they were baffled so I told her teachers weren't allowed to tell people.