And so the deceit from dcs childhood catches up with me....

[Caughtinmyweboflies]

What started as an innocent conversation has turned into a confession session, and my 21yo is shocked.

We were talking about a band he listened to as a kid (JLS if you're interested), and it came about that I told him when he was maybe 5 or 6 that their names were Aston, JB, Colin and Jeff (couldn't remember the other 2s names) and he just never questioned it for all these years.

As the conversation went on I had to confess to a multitude of things like dropping cool metal things ahead of him when he was out with his metal detector, he thought he was just really lucky, he thought he saw a meteor hit earth when he was about 8, they were doing a thing at school where an 'alien' crashed into earth and they did a whole term around teaching the alien stuff, so the night before I stood outside his bedroom window with a stereo and a flashlight, and he saw and heard this meteor and just never questioned it.

All in all I had to confess to maybe 10 things that I did to make his childhood magical and he is shook.

He's very clever, at uni, paying his own way by working full time, own flat etc, but he just never really questioned anything (also autistic and takes everything at face value as we have learned in the last few years).

I'm sitting here wracking my brains to other stuff I have done now.

(Lighthearted, he is actually very grateful and thanked me then got a bit teary, after he told me off 🤣)

Anyone else had innocent lies catch up with them?

I have a flip side of the 'dog went to the farm' stories.

I used to work at a farm attraction which had free range chickens. Two of them were evil - known to chase small children, attack picnickers and woe betide you if they caught a glimpse of a painted toenail. One day they were gone and the elderly volunteer who cared for them informed us they'd gone to live in a friend's orchard. "Oh yes?" I thought, assuming they'd gone in the pot.

The following year he had a big birthday and we were invited to his party. I was talking to a woman who, when hearing where I worked said "Oh, I've got two of your chickens living in my orchard". Bob, I am so sorry I ever doubted you.

When my son was little he had a little blue TY bear that he took everywhere. My daughter, his older sister had the pink version. But where we had been wise with her, we’d bought a couple of them so that if one got lost there was a replacement. Anyway we were in our first holiday abroad and blue Ted disappeared. So thinking in my feet, I have him spare pink Ted and said poor teddy had stayed in the sun too long and got sunburnt which made him a bit pink. That lie got us through the holiday. We managed to track down a replacement blue bear from Germany when we got home n

I blame King Charles for all the rules my seven
year Old doesn’t like. Been blaming him for years. Bedtime at 7.20 blame King Charles he makes the rules! He’s going to be seething one day (after he’s overthrown the monarchy)

The black and white one is absolutely lovely. And true. For your dad the world was black and white until you arrived and everything changed and turned to colour. It must be lovely to have a dad who thinks of you in that way.

Love this!!!

I never told my DS that Father Christmas was real, we still had a sack and everything but presented it as a made up fun story.
When he was about 6 he told me that actually I’d got it wrong and Father Christmas was in fact real. Imagine my surprise!
I then had to ‘do’ Father Christmas for the next few years 🙄

I've told this before but my mum was so good at convincing me that Santa was real that when my daughter was born and I had to do the stocking I cried my eyes out.

I obviously knew, as I had bought my DD presents for the stocking but facing the reality was hard.

(And I am honestly the last person you would expect to say this)

@Elisheva funny to have our posts back to back.

Bloody hamster died. Drove to every pet shop in a 30 mile radius and managed to find one the same colour before school pickup. Kids never questioned why the hamster had shrunk overnight and still to this day think it lived to be 7 years old.

My housemate, with a completely straight face told us not to bother, the music was playing so no icecream left. Parents really should correct their lies before dc leave home 🤣🤦🏻‍♀️

You might enjoy this OP. The poet is from Donegal

And They All Lived Happily
Denise Blake
All bad guys died in the end.
My kiss did make bruises better.
It was right to put lost teeth under a pillow
and that time, when you didn’t find money,
there really was a tooth-fairy holiday.
I told the truth about castor oil
as you have grown big and strong.
Broccoli, porridge, the last bit on your plate,

have been the making of you.
I really believed your Granny would get better.
I didn’t think your eyes would possibly stick
that way, but it seemed the thing to say.
That report card wasn’t worth all my giving out,
I knew your teacher had a pick against you
but how to admit that to a ten-year-old?

We weren’t made of money. I did need a break.
Our dog did go to live on a farm, for a while.

When I said I’ll think about it. I did.
You do know I was I right about that girl.
Honestly, most of the time, I told you the truth.

A group of us hired a big house in Devon for a week one summer and told the kids there was no WiFi in Devon. We managed about three magical days of hide and seek and tree climbing before they twigged.

Absolutely love this 😂😂😂😂 So original and funny 😂😂😂😂 Can’t wait for your son to twig 😁😁😁

We used to have to drive past the local McDonald's on our way home from the childminders house. I told DS (aged about 4 st the time) that if we saw a McDonald's lorry outside it that the place was closed while the staff and driver sorted out the chips to remove the ones with black bits on them.

When I was a small child, I was a right pain in the arse about vegetables. One day, while listening to me bitch when I spotted carrots on my plate, my Mum said "They're not carrots, they're Belos". (Pronounced Bee-low). Turned out I liked Belos. Belos were round, and disc shaped, unlike those long thin carrots.

For 3 years I happily ate my Belos, until my Mum and Dad went away for a few nights, leaving Grandma to look after us. For some reason, Grandma had no idea what Belos were, and when I investigated further in school the next day, it turned out no other fucker had a clue what they were either. I began to smell a rat, and when my parents came home they had to fess up.

At 42, I still prefer Belos to carrots though.

I bought a new tumble dryer last year, DS (20) was away at uni so didn’t see me set it up. I was away a couple of weeks ago and he phoned me to ask how it works. It’s a heat pump one that isn’t straight forward. It is also high tech and I have an app on my phone that alerts me when it’s finished. We do all the washing in the garage so it does save time trailing out to the garage, especially in the rain, to check on it’s progress.

So when it had a finished drying DS’s clothes it messaged me. I then messaged DS to tell him it had finished. He was a little puzzled how I knew but assumed it was just one of my super mum capabilities. I thought he knew it had an app but of course he was away when we got it.

We were chatting this evening when I mentioned that the tumble dryer had messaged me. He was astonished that it was so high tech.

I made the mistake when he was young, telling him that mums know everything. Every morning, on a he school run, he would ask some random question. It provoked some interesting conversations until the day I couldn’t answer a question and he was so excited that he’d proved that mums don’t know everything. I had no idea he’d taken me so seriously.

I remember my niece visiting when we’d had a new car with remote key fob locks. It was quite a new thing and she was only 4. I stuck the keys in my pocket and asked her to clap her hands to unlock the door. Whenever they visit she would try and unlock the doors by clapping. Eventually she worked it out.

My DD (autistic) hated having her nails cut, so I used to do them when she was asleep. She was convinced for many years that she was the one person who's nails never, ever grew!

I also told her that I was the reason that she didn't have her dad in her life. I wanted to protect her from the truth, that he was a waste of space until she was old enough to really understand. But she found some of the paperwork from years ago, she was being nosey and found out what he was actually like, which still breaks my heart. I wish she was still of the opinion I'm a difficult character and that's why her dad was a shit, not that he just sucks as a person.

Other than that, I think I've been fairly transparent, but when she gets back from holiday with her boyfriend and his family tomorrow, I'll ask what things I've lied about to her!

I told my children that the radio in my car only had Radio 2 on it! They believed me for years! My father was born on Christmas Day, he told them that’s why everyone had a Christmas tree to celebrate his birthday!

Similar to my younger brother being able to open my aunties car windows by saying "abracadabra"!

@Vimesandhiscardboardboots one of my siblings had carrot issues too as a child. Luckily my beloved uncle was an excellent gardener who grew very tasty veg. He lived 200 miles away though so it was difficult to get much of his harvest. He very cleverly found a way to supply a local shop though, so mum could by John's veg there for us. I recently thought he was a cheap git making us buy it 😂

my mum might read this but I can’t resist!
our surname is also the name of a town. When we visited the town as children, my dad told me he was the mayor of the town and that’s why it was named after him. He said hello to people and they said hello back and so I believed him for years! 😂 My husband thinks it’s very funny and still brings it up - especially as we’ve since visited the town again!

I was a brilliant Tooth Fairy for some years, despite causing a scandal amongst the 3rd year infants by once leaving £2 rather than £1.
I eventually admitted to my teen that I'd collected all his baby teeth in a special tooth tin and showed him - he was utterly disgusted!

This is so cute!

when my kids were little we used to move the clock hands forward on New Year’s Eve and count down to ‘midnight’ , cheer sing and celebrate then go to bed… when it was actually about 9pm.

got away with this for years. They enjoyed the fun and excitement of seeing the new year in, and weren’t knackered and grumpy the next day.

i confessed when they were about 10 and 12 and they couldn’t believe it !!!

Before Christmas we used to fake call daily Rasmus the elf to have a chat about how the kids had behaved that day.

We had a guinea pig and a rabbit who had free range in the garden in the day time.
To my horror, one day a large bird of prey swooped down and picked up the guinea pig like it was a fly through happy meal ( was pegging washing and was frozen in horror) We told the kids it had gone to be a free guinea pig with the rabbits in the fields behind us...

Last Christmas we were chatting about the past and I mentioned that particular lie... and Dd1... now 32... was shocked. She still believed my lie. (And made me feel terrible!!!!)