Please come and talk to me if you are a Londoner and happy here

[Newmeagain]

I am just having a bit of a crisis. It’s probably not just about where I am living - it’s probably part of a “I am 50 and how is the rest of my life going to look” kind of thing - but where I am living is part of it.

i am not British but have lived here for a long time. That’s probably relevant because I don’t have extended family here.

I am fortunate to have a small house in quite a central part of North London and I used to consider myself to be very lucky to be able to live here. But recently there are so many things that annoy me about my neighbourhood. To get to my local high street I go past the tube station, which has a pedestrian area which was suppose to be a nice green space but instead has turned into a really grimy hangout for drunks, drug addicts and Deliveroo drivers waiting for their next job. I may be slightly exaggerating but it almost feels like something from some post apocalyptic world where you have to pass through the “bad lands” to reach your destination. In general there is just lots of rubbish and dog poo everywhere and I feel like noise pollution has also increased. I definitely don’t think this is unique to my part of London.

So - I have started fixating about a “house in the country”. But there are some problems. My job is very specific and tied to London, with mandated days in the office. To make it more complicated my dd is starting uni here and for various complicated reasons wants to stay at home. Also, as I am single, I could potentially feel quite isolated if I moved to a completely new area.

So I need other Londoners to tell me why I should stay!

I dislike seeing the deliveroo types hunched in black sitting on their motorcycles staring at their phones. They are a very depressing sight. I also dislike lime bikes discarded on and blocking the pavement. I also dislike people cycling fast in parks and playing music in parks - effectively stealing the quiet safe reprieve.
Mainly I feel sorry for these people. I wish they weren’t here, but they are, and they don’t know any different, and they don’t know it was so much better before they arrived. The overcrowding in London has spoiled it a huge amount. It’s very sad.

I have definitely experienced the worsening mess and sad homelessness situation in a leafy suburb, but still wouldn't leave London for anywhere. The access to art and culture and not having to ferry my kids everywhere because we have such widespread public transport coverage more than makes up for the downsides for me.

I still love London. But having been born and bred here it’s different for me. That has also meant I have lived in many different parts of London and although South of the river has it’s grim bits just like all over, there’s something lighter about it all.
I could never go back over the river.

I live in a gritty part of S London and love living in London.

I can overlook the immediate litter and grime on my way to two fab local parks and any number of excellent local restaurants and cafes. There is also a strong sense of community and I have different circles of friends.

I can hop on the bus / train and get to a huge range of World class culture, much of which is free. There is always something new or quirky to explore.

The brilliant public transport, being at the middle of major rail hubs mean travel is easy and good value. Very easy to get out of London to the coast or hills.@

A choice of very good hospitals and other healthcare within easy reach.

I love the vibrancy, the diversity, the views of the bridges.

I am newly retired and have no intention to move out

Just as an aside, it’s a shame to lump Deliveroo drivers in with drunks and drug addicts. I’m not even a big user of Deliveroo but god bless those guys, doing a pretty shit and thankless job to make a lot of people’s lives easier. They’re not doing it because they have lots of better options and they’ve gotta hang out somewhere waiting to carry out our orders. Maybe try to see them as a good thing about being in a city. If you move to the country and find out no fucker wants to drive your limited takeaway options to you and you need to go get it yourself, never mind the angst of trying to get a cab, you’ll long for those guys.

Also to add.. my friend moved out to a tiny village in a well sought after bit of the British countryside. So far they’ve had a rapist on the run discovered sleeping in their garage, ongoing issues with the drug dealer over the road, and much more…

All of this!

I think they do the job because they get paid. It’s not a vocation bringing alms to the poor or succour to the needy.

Thanks all. I will focus on the positives and see what happens with dd. To be honest, for now I should focus on the positives. I am very close to a green space, I have fabulous and cheap food readily available, etc.

I'm a life long Londoner. I love it. I've lived all round it but at heart I'm a Sarf Lununer.

But, OP, now is not the time to leave London, even if you change borough. After all those years of outrageous Council Tax, the holy grail awaits - the Over 60s Oyster card. And once you're clutching that, London truly is your Oyster. You can hop on a bus, tube, or some of the trains, and get anywhere in the Oyster area for nothing. No more thinking it's not worth paying for a couple of stops when it's raining and your shopping's heavy. Just want to check out an exhibition, or a room or two of a gallery or museum, or see if any of the theatres have cheap tickets, or fancy a bit of Dim Sum in Chinatown or an amazing curry in Brick Lane? At least you don't have to factor in the cost of the journey. You might as well go again tomorrow!

The thing about living in the South is that most of the action is north of the river, which means crossing the river. I treat myself to a walk across and vary the bridge. Because I can. Whatever the weather, no matter how busy, walking across London's bridges is an uplifting experience, provided you can take it at a pace you can enjoy.

I never said it was. That’s what I meant by not having other options. But it doesn’t make them a scourge alongside drug addicts and drunks.

OP, echoing others who say that while your daughter is at university in London, and living at home, stay put. Also, it's a huge leg-up for graduates/young jobhunters to be able to base themselves in London for low cost while they get established in their working lives. Think of all the bright young things living in poorer towns who would love to up and move to where the job prospects are brighter, but can't afford to rent. This is very much our situation with DS, who would struggle to forgive us if we moved out now.

I'm about to qualify for my Oyster 60+ travel card and I'm looking forward to free transport all over the city. I am planning to spend a lot more time exploring London - it's so fluid, constantly changing, that even the bits you think you know bear revisiting. I've been here nearly 35 years now, and I think I would really struggle to live elsewhere, although I get the craving for quieter spaces, less traffic, easier proximity to 'proper' countryside and coast. (We're just back from a weekend in Leeds/Ilkley, and the speed with which you can leave a big city and be on a moor or in a dale is pretty impressive. So we use the extra earning power we have in London to fund weekends away!)

Even though I am homeless I still love London. Would be a lot hapier if I had a place of my own!

But still I love the green open spaces (there are more than I realised), the transport sysyem is great, 4 hospitals near by, ok shops. While room hunting, I found myself in parts of London I did not know ansd was surprised that they ed better than I thought.

If you are looking to move out of London to a commuter town you will have to consider how much to get in and out ofLondon hould you need to travel there. Also transport etc etc

And I never said they were a scourge.

Ah yes, they really messed up Highbury Corner didn't they!

You don't need to leave this fabulous city, but you do need to move to one of its more village-y areas. Highgate?

Good post.

Nope, but I was referring to OP's mention of them, which was what prompted my post and I was using my own word to summarise, if that's okay. The difference is that your post implied I was saying that they were altruistic, which was not the case. You seem to be wilfully missing the point whatever I say.

Ha, ha yes!! You are a good detective!!

I actually considered Highgate a few years ago but the really lovely parts of Highgate were and are outside of my price range (I don’t want a flat) and the small houses which are the equivalent of my current house are in the much less desirable parts of Highgate.

Okay loads of careers don't do that, many jobs actually preying on vulnerable people. There's nothing wrong about delivery drivers doing their jobs, and I'm very confused as to why they are a 'depressing site'. Also the people in the city don't exist to make these convenient for you - cycling fast in a park is fine, people have places to be or maybe don't want to go at snail pace. Also whether a place has 10,000 people or 10 million, I'm guessing they'll still be people playing music in park, it's fun, and brings a sense community. The park doesn't stipulate being a 'safe repreive,' it's not a libary. I don't think any of these people are 1. Causing any trouble (you just seem to take offence to anything and 2. Want you to feel sorry for them - if anything I feel sorry for you, being so bothered and sad at perfectly normal things.

Yep. I’m an old born and bred cockney and never happy out of London.

I do live in a leafy London suburb now though.

Thanks for your pity, it means so much.

Marks out of ten, miss?

I left north London 20 years ago and still miss it. Life took us elsewhere, but there is nowhere like London and DH and I are speculating about retirement there. Excellent public transport, millions of things to do, loads of walks. If someone can sort out the NHS, i'd be very happy going back to a 1 bed flat with DH and pretend we are 22 again.

I am also not English. One of the things that has always struck me about London and even the edge of Surrey (where I am now - on the Surrey/London border) is how a relatively short distance can make a huge difference to an area. A friend was unfortunately burnt by this some years ago - buying a lovely flat in a beautiful apartment building that turned out to be just slightly too far into the "dodgy" part of her (broadly very nice) area. Similarly with DH and I - we're in a sort of slightly no-man's land spot - walk 100m and cross a road and you're in classic leaft surrey, walk 100m in the opposite direction and cross a different road and you wouldn't want to be a lone woman after dark.

So perhaps what you need to consider is staying broadly in your area, but making a small move. eg, if you find that the shops and amenities you like are on the other side of the tube station, move to that side?

Sadly, that can be quite an expensive process, but if you can swing it, that could be the answer? If Dh and I could do it, we'd move literally to the other side of the railway line that runs down the bottom of our road. As the crow flies, literally less than 500m! But the cost of that move would be exorbitant, so we don't.

The main differences between north and south London are that N London exists on the tube network which means higher house prices and a greater connection or reliance on central London- which, ipso facto, means less community in your area. South London is poorly served by the tube with people communting by rail or bus. This means slightly cheaper housing (so popular with families) and mini village like centres because people are more likely to stay local.

A man I once sat next to on the Northern line explained the difference very well to his young son (about 3). He said we are now leaving North London, where the rich people live, and are entering South London, where the real people live.

I only lived north once, over 40 years ago, and felt the local population was very transitory. I've lived in a few different places in S London and much prefer it. We know all our neighbours, we have lovely local bars, restaurants, cafes, parks etc..., but unlike a small town or large village our population is hugely diverse.