Partner violence

[Sandandsea123]

I dont know what to do. My partner went out for the day yesterday and last night rang me in an awful drunk state; telling me he’d hit someone and they were on the floor, and he left before police came. He sounded quite gleeful about it. We had to rehome our dog because he was getting violent to him and he goes out his way to scare the cats. He’d never hurt us; I just don’t even want him coming home. But I love him and the brief bits of time he does help are amazing. But will the police find him and this have repercussions?

So he’s a violent drunken prick who only ‘helps’ you in ‘bits’ - so not a true partner in any sense of the word.

You ‘love him to bits’ because you think you can save him and that the ‘nice’ bit is who he really is deep down. Let me tell you it isn’t. You’re deluded. He won’t change. Any woman with a speck of self esteem wouldn't be within a mile of a lowlife like him.

Why don’t you think you deserve better for yourself?

"He wouldn't hurt me"

I'm sorry but you are either really naive or in deep denial.

He's a man who cannot control his temper. You need to realise you have been extremely fortunate to not have been in the receiving end of it yet. You know the risk. You have evidence of it. You need to get out while you are still alive.

Don't allow yourself to become a static of yet another woman assaulted or killed by her partner.

Well they certainly know how to tap the MN fish tank whoever they are.

He's scum and you damn well know it.

How can you stay with someone like that?

People who start on animals eventually start on humans. How could you look at someone and want to have sex with someone who takes great delight in abusing animals and people?

RUNNNNNNN.

Yes - lights the blue touchpaper and stands well back.

He is unsafe around your children. He has driven your baby not strapped in to her car seat. What would you do if he killed her in a car accident?

Are you actually serious?. Jesus this is terrifying.

AS tells me that OP also has children with this man.

What a shitshow .

A case for SS, most definitely.

Is this a joke?

Oh God yes, I've just had a look.

They have a 6 month old baby and in the OP's own words, "he has zero caring responsibilities for her, I do absolutely everything".

Not a relationship the OP or their baby is safe in.

Intervention definitely needed imo.

Dis he not call an ambulance? OP you need to leave asap if not now.

That’s horrendous.

Well done op
lots and lots of froth

Unwatched

This. He is a bad man. I am shocked that your main question is if the police will find him. He should go somewhere where he cant hurt animals or people. You should have kept the dog and got rid of him.

There is a nine month old and an older daughter living in this shit show and thinking it’s normal for women to be abused by awful, awful men. And so the cycle will continue.

OP your partner takes your bank card to punish you, you’ve had to create a back up plan so that you have access to money if you need it. This happens in relationships that are off the scale bad, not normal ones.

You also pay for 90%+ of household bills and he sometimes gives you £50 a week but only if you haven’t annoyed him. You do all the cooking and cleaning. He changed her nappy 6 times in the first five months of her life. You have had to rehome pets due to his violence. He ‘goes out of his way to scare’ your cats.

What the fuck are you thinking staying with this man?

Your poor kids. I don’t know how old your older daughter is but I hope she tells someone with a safeguarding responsibility what her home life is like so that SS can support you to leave. He’s not even her dad.

Though on your other thread you say, when asked why you’re with him despite all this, “I love him.”

So I fear you’d choose to remain with him despite the very clear cost to your children.

The OP's children are 14 years old and 7 months old.

"He wouldn’t hurt me; I know that; he’s only once slightly done something. He’s home and apologetic and insanely hungover. I’ve put my bank card on my phone now so can use that when he’s taken the real one"
You're totally and utterly in denial, good grief. How can you even stay with someone who hurt your dog. Raise your bar lady, you deserve better!

OP doesn't seem too bothered about this person either!😟

Once slightly done something will become twice doing a bit more. Then three times. Until you lose count.
WTAF did you get rid of a pet that was being abused rather than getting rid of the abuser. I really hope there are no kids in the middle of this.