Grandparent childcare this summer

[thebeautifulsky]

I'll start this by saying I'm a Grandparent who happily takes care of our DGD two days a week. She's two and I've been looking after her since she was 9 months old to enable my son and DDL to go to work without the expense of nursery. Her other Grandparents do two days too (DDIL works 4 days). Our DGD is a joy and both sets of Grandparents have a wonderful relationship with her.

I nipped into town today and it surprised me how many Grandparents were looking after grandchildren from babies to probably 10/11 year olds. I don't remember it being like this when my children were growing up. My son and daughter had summer camps etc which were affordable and enjoyable. I know it's the school holidays for most but it made me realise how difficult it must be for working parents without Grandparent support.

So, hats off to those who are juggling work and childcare. I didn't have Grandparent childcare in the 1990's but things seemed easier and less expensive or maybe I don't remember it being as tough as it is today.

Not sure what the point of my chat is, but I'm in awe of parents today juggling work and family.

Yes it’s definitely a trend. I’ve read a few pieces in the media about it. Your son and his wife are lucky to have two sets of active grandparents who can help so much. It can be such a mutually beneficial relationship, although sometimes knackering for grandparents!

You’re very kind to do that (and the other grandparents too). What lucky people they are having free childcare for 4 days every week!

I had zero help and it had a huge impact on the career I could do.

i have two primary age children and loads of grandparents do the school run. Some parents do massively take the piss and I know a few grandoarents who have been doing a lot of childcare for many years and are exhausted but can’t step back because their children tell them they cannot afford not to have them do it, even though they’ve saved thousands over the years.

We have 2 DC under 2 and zero family help. I've never been apart from my DC other than appointments and c section for the second. My OH has to come out of work to have the kids or I take them with me. I wish we had a little more help but not an option unfortunately. Although, I find it very weird when people call it "childcare", I know essentially that's what it is. But I remember my nana looking after us when we were younger for my mam to attend appointments, do jobs, or have a break. However it was never referred to as childcare, just spending time with nana and grandad. My mam is main childcare for my DNs and finds the wording odd too.
You sound like a lovely GP 🥰 your DC and DGC are very lucky x

I'm amazed at the number of grandparents at the school gates these days. I don't remember seeing a single one when my kids were at primary school in the '90s.

In the 70s the mums stayed home to bring up the kids and the dads went to work. Simpler times

As someone who doesn't have any grandparent help I really feel like I'm in the minority. All the other parents I speak to get help even if occasionally.

Lots of the affordable kids clubs and playschemes didn't survive lockdown.

Round here we used to have a very very affordable one (£15 a week), but it folded because the council no longer offer lower hire rates for voluntary/non profit making groups and that combined with some unreasonable parent demands was just the end of it.

The only option now is £40 a day.

Our local council run summer camps are £20 per activity and only last around half a day. In the less affluent towns some only have one or two kids turning up as the cost is crazy if you have 2 or 3 kids wanting an activity everyday. Definitely very different to the 20p a day my school 'playscheme' cost back in the 1980's.

Anyway, to answer the OP Grannies (and Grandads) are definitely taking up more slack in the school holidays. I suspect with working from home and more flexible working kids don't need the school term childcare they used to before covid but need a bit of help during the school holidays.

It's wonderful of you to be helping them. Mine are secondary age now so no need for childcare and as a teacher I have always been the childcare in the holidays anyway but even with that taken care of the nursery, breakfast and afterschool clubs were so expensive I was basically working to pay childcare.

Lots of women worked in the 70's.

At the primary school mine were at most were SAHMs in the 90s.

I'm a childminder and most of the toddler groups I go to are almost all grandparents and childminders. The only one that is majority parents attending is on a Friday I guess because it's more common as a day off.

As a single mum with no backup at all, I was massively organised. I tracked down every summer holiday camp in the area. Compared costs and offerings and what ds would prefer.

Then I booked his place as soon as bookings opened. I was always first 😊I always had ds' care booked three months ahead. It's a big relief not to have to do it anymore - ds is 16.

Costs for four weeks were usually about £400. Now it's over £1,000 which is scary.

My Mum was a SAHM in the 70s so they had no need of any childcare - but that's why she was a SAHM as they had no family nearby who could've looked after us in holidays.

We have no family near us so all childcare has been split between the2 of us

I do think that if my DS17 were to go on and have children at some point I would be happy to help in summer holidays etc and also maybe 1 day in the week to hep but I wouldn't want to commit to 3/4 days every week

I am hoping one day to be an involved helpful grandparent

There weren't holiday clubs for older children because they'd have just stayed at home or with older siblings/cousins while mum was at work.

My parents have my 3 one day a week in the holidays, we don't need them term-time as we can manage drop off pick up ourselves. My youngest is not at school yet there are no holiday clubs that will take preschoolers around here and most nurseries won't allow them to only do 1 day a week.

I took mine to the park today and it was all Grandparents.

There are 4 holiday clubs near us:
1 is sport specific 9-3:30 and is £25 per day or £100 per week. This club is the best deal as they offer a 50% sibling discount but not great if you don't like the sport as that is all they do all day. They also only do a very local one for 2 weeks over the holidays otherwise you need to travel up to 30mins

1 run by breakfast/after school club which is £29 per child 9-3:30, no additional child discount. They only do 4 days a week and have a special thing on each week that costs extra (anywhere between £10-30). They are next to a park and have lots of activities and a theme to each week.

Then there are 2 others one is art based and one is a franchise both are around £40 a day and only offering selected days over the holidays.

I’m a GM, me and DH have eight GC. We are booked solidly with GC all summer. We love helping out. I find feeding them a struggle though as they all seem to have hollow legs!

Given how many kids in decades past were free range and only expected home for meals it wouldn't have been as much of an imposition to ask someone like a neighbour to look after them during the holidays.

My mum had 2 jobs when I was a child in the 70's. She used a child minder until a certain age and then obviously latch key kid as we were independent much younger than today's kids. Most working class mothers worked, all my friends mum's did too.

I was a kid in the 90s (northern town), most of the parents of my classmates were either SAHM or worked part time school hours. The local fish finger factory actually had a "mum shift" that was 9.30-3 mon- Fri. Lots of the mums of school age children worked there. My friends mum worked in a village corner shop 9.30-2.30 3 days a week when they had deliveries. There were a handful of children whose mums worked full time, one was a Dr, another was a teacher, another was a solicitor. They all went either to the childminder or one girls dad worked shifts and he picked her up when he was off and if not her grandma used to pick her up.

At my DDs current school, there are loads of grandparents at pick up and drop off. Almost all of my DDs friends are been looked after by grandparents at least twice a week whilst their parents work. Child care is very expensive nowadays. We live in a childcare desert that pretty much dries up during the school holidays. We have 8 2 form primary schools in our town and there is 1 provision for children between 5 and 11 with 20 spaces running through the holidays which offers childcare between 9am and 4pm. There are 5 other provisions, all only offering 3 days a week and only 3 hours a day (9-12 or 10-1). Every child minder is full. Every day nursery is full. My friend has had to ask her 93 year old nan to look after her 3 year old for 3 days this holiday as there is literally no-one else, the nursery is full and prioritising their full time children who have had the spaces booked well in advance, she can't take leave as it's already gone unless she takes emergency parental leave. She's asked every relative and mum friend she knows and they are all either away on holiday or working themselves.

Yes definitely more of a trend, but having 2 working parents is definitely more common than it was when I was a child in the 80's. My mum didn't work till I was as school, and even then it was as a childminder, so she still did the school run.

Its great you are able to help and hopefully your DIL appreciates it.

To echo a lot of other posters, the cheapest holiday club round here is £15 a day, but its only 10-3, not much use with the hours I work tbh. I'm lucky I get a lot of annual leave, but I do save it for using during the summer holidays.

Times really have changed over the past 30 years regarding childcare. I have no idea how you all do it. Both parents have to work to pay the ever increasing bills and it seems childcare costs suck up most of the income. I know my son and DDIL are fortunate with Grandparent help but both work shifts and long days (Drs) so nursery is out of the question because of the limited hours. Something needs to be done to help working parents.

When I was bringing my dc up we could afford to live with just one wage coming in. As did most people I know. So one parent was always home. Now households need two wages to make ends meet. Do more grandparents stepping in to help out

Times have changed because they saw a way to increase the tax take by taxing and monetizing babysitting!!! When i was 14 (1987) i was babysitting other younger kids in the street and i was also home alone with my younger DB with a 16 year old neighbour popping her head in the door occasionally to see if we were ok.