Do you scream?

[Beachtastic]

I don't mean when... you know... 😳
...and this is not a Sistine Chapel thread. Or at least, I don't think it is!

I was cleaning my teeth last night when DH walked into the bathroom. I'd thought he was asleep, and because of the noise of the electric toothbrush didn't hear his footsteps approaching.

Well, I let out such a shriek that we were both deafened 😬 ... of course laughed about it immediately, but anyone walking past the house might easily have felt they should raise the alarm!

This morning I remembered that when staying at a hotel recently, at breakfast I screamed when the waitress suddenly appeared at the table to take my order. Luckily there weren't many other guests around, but it was hard to reassure her she'd done nothing wrong.

DH has reminded me that when he first came to stay (years ago), I screamed when he appeared in the garden on the first morning. (I'd lived alone for some time...)

I don't consider myself a particularly nervous person and am curious to know if this happens to you too?

I have a strong startle reflex too and will jump but more likely to gasp and swear than scream.
The one time I definitely have screamed was when I fell downstairs and I can say without a shadow of a doubt that I screamed on an inhale rather than an exhale. I know this because I inhaled a mouthful of hair whilst doing it. (I’m not prepared to fall downstairs again to find out if all of my screams are inhaled though.)

Just today I said 'people should only scream when they're in peril'. Or in an amusement park; that's OK. In your scenario I would jump a foot, put my hand on my chest and say 'OMG you scared me.'

This has cracked me up because I'm just imagining you as the Catherine Tate character that screams at everything 😂

I do this OP. Jump out of my skin (and often with a yell or a scream as I feel shocked) at normal things like someone walking in a room or saying my name. It’s worse if I’m concentrating. I have ADHD and suspect it’s to do with that - I can’t tune people or noises in my environment in or out at will, and if I’m concentrating, I’m REALLY concentrating. I have done it for as long as I can remember. It’s completely involuntary.

@AtomHeartMotherOfGod
This has cracked me up because I'm just imagining you as the Catherine Tate character that screams at everything 😂

Having looked it up on YouTube, I showed that "toaster" sketch to my DH and he laughed and said "Yep, that's you."

I just remembered another one... a couple of years ago, we had a Ukrainian couple staying with us for a few months. Well, you can imagine how that went.

It is hard to extend the hand of hospitality while also e.g. dropping the laundry bag in fright and literally bellowing a scream in someone's face when they appear at the back door 😬

DH speaks fluent Russian so was able to reassure them better than I could that it was nothing to do with them, but when joining us for dinner etc they did learn to approach with elaborate pantomime movements! We're friends with them and still laugh about it, but I do feel a chump.

Sorry but this has made me laugh so much 😂😂
I jump scared easy, but I dont scream, physically cant scream, but i sort of go rahhhhhhh

@LouiseK93 the trouble is that my immediate reaction afterwards is also to burst out laughing. It's a wonder I haven't been carted off to a padded cell, but maybe it's only a matter of time! 🤦🏻‍♀️

Why do women scream, when men don't? It's a serious question, somebody must know the answer.

My gay bestie would 100% scream when he saw a spider 😁

Hmm. I have no reply to that.

I have no idea. What I hate about it is that it's such a useless reaction. The horror movies where women shriek like loons, I just think "Daft cow."

And here I am...!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

No and hate others doing it.

We're sitting with the windows into the garden open (very stuffy tonight, storm coming) and DH just said "The sprinklers are going to come on in 10 minutes, so ... you know... don't be scared" 🤦🏻‍♀️😂

I think this is 50% him being considerate and 50% him protecting his eardrums!!! 😨

Same. Being easily startled is so annoying to me, though.

Yes I’m a screamer it’s purely conditioned into me from a traumatic and abusive childhood as I knew if I was being startled it would lead to an out of the blue slap around the face and worse so I would scream.

everyone saying it’s performative are truly awful unsympathetic and thankfully have never experienced abuse

I don’t chose to scream it’s purely instinctive my husband will not creep up on me because he knows I have no control over my nervous startle reflex

someone saying they would find the OP irritating over a purely unconscious behaviour is beyond smug in my opinion - you’re lucky your startle reflex isn’t this pronounced it meant you were SAFE and didn’t need to scream

I don't think I have ever screamed.

I don't know how to describe it but I tend to under react to things. Like zero response sometimes, it takes me a bit to get into gear if it's a real problem. I am too controlled and guarded sometimes. I find loud and dramatic people really difficult to be around, so honestly I couldn't be friends with someone who is shocked that a waitress approached to take an order, while sitting in a restaurant waiting for a waitress to approach to take their order. It seems daft, sorry OP

Thanks, I didn't know there was a name for this ! As I have a VERY strong one too - it's embarrassing 🫨 and I absolutely could - and have - jump if a waiter appears at my elbow. But not a screamer, no. In fact once when someone tried to break into my bedroom years ago I couldn't scream even tho' I tried !

My mum does this!

That might explain the high startle reflex but not the scream.

My daughter has an extremely strong startle reflex, she never screams. I presume it is because as a child it was something we put a stop to right from the start. I have never screamed that I know of, and that is likely because my mum was as irritated by screaming as I was so I assume if I or my siblings did it young, we’d have been stopped too.

Yes all the time, it’s embarrassing sometimes but it just comes outwith no control, someone appearing randomly, a spider, a wasp flying near me.

No it’s dreadful. And kids need to stop doing it. Laughing fine, screaming no. Baffles me how parents tolerate it. I think they’re just from noisy chaotic households.

If I hear a scream it should be because someone needs help.

I’m a jumpy person so yes I do scream when I’m startled. I know it irritates DP but I really can’t help it. I’m still mortified about a yoga class I did years ago. It was the relaxation bit at the end and I was really tired and half dropping off. I suddenly got startled and thought a rat was scuttling towards my face so screamed at the top of my lungs (totally involuntary 🙈) when actually it was someone getting up to go to the loo and walking towards me. Mortified. Literally screamed in a silent room full of people trying to relax.

I scream if suddenly startled but only as a reflex and can usually cut it off very fast So it’s more like a sharp squeal. Things like my husband popping his head round the shower curtain when I’m in the bath and thought the door was locked. Yet when I was in real cases where I was scared for my life I didn’t scream. I guess my body went into flight mode then.

Just want to reiterate that I never used to scream. I was a quiet child, shortsighted, bookish. Not an attention seeker. Quite the opposite really: throughout my adult life, I have increasingly tended to avoid people. In fact, I think maybe what's going on with me is that (a) a lifetime of shortsightedness, fixed with laser surgery in my early 40s, might have made me rather unobservant (!) and/or focused inwards; and (b) the past 20-odd years, I've chosen to live in remote areas and worked from home, without a social life. So maybe that odd combination is what makes me react so strongly to someone suddenly appearing in my field of vision! (I mean, until later in life I didn't really HAVE a field of vision! - and until DH, no one to appear in it!)

This thread has been a bit of an eye-opener because I honestly thought more PPs would say "Ah yes, that's definitely a thing, don't worry about it" - but now I feel like a proper freak 😳😕

Luckily DH loves me and is very kind. He made me laugh earlier by reminding me, "Two minutes left before the garden sprinklers come on" 😂💗

OMG 😂😂😂 that makes me feel better!!!!!!!!

Many years ago my best friend and I went to see The Woman in Black at the village hall. I screamed the whole way through... I then made my best friend walk me home as we live on the edge of a rural village with few street lights.
No word of a lie as I put my hand on the garden gate bolt to slide it back my then boyfriend cycled up behind us with no lights.. "GOOD EVENING LADIES!" Cue two women leaping in the air, more screaming and a lot of swear words!!