Prank called my boyfriend with an app and a woman answered… nearly 10pm. Feeling confused.

[PeaceOverChaos]

Okay, I feel a bit silly even writing this but I need to get it off my chest.

Earlier tonight, I used one of those prank call apps to call my boyfriend — just messing around, nothing serious. We’ve done dumb stuff like this before, but this time when the call went through… a woman answered. It was nearly 10pm.

He lives at home with his dad and little sister (who’s quite young), and I don’t live with him. So there shouldn’t be any other women around that I know of, especially not answering his phone late at night.

I didn’t say anything — I just hung up, completely thrown. And honestly, part of the reason I haven’t brought it up is because it’s kind of embarrassing to admit I prank called him in the first place 🙈 But now I’m stuck wondering what the hell that was about.

Could there be a normal explanation? Or is this a red flag I shouldn’t ignore? I really don’t want to jump to conclusions but it’s eating away at me a bit.

Anyone had something like this happen?

This! Not even a girlfriend or wife (unless they answered on purpose to throw you, or because it was a weird number he may have asked someone else to answer it?) Best you just ask him or you'll need know

It depends whose phone it is.
If it was a teen’s mate’s phone, say they were in the pool, then no, I would carry it to them or let them know they had missed a call
My teens - sure
But they would answer my phone and have

So it’s not obviously an issue

Surely if someone has two or more girlfriends then answering a phone would be a no

Exactly this. Mumsnet is like its own little bubble. If I was from outer space and used Mumsnet as a yardstick for what the human race was like I’d think everyine was ND with abusive or useless partners and that answering the door to people was a cardinal sin.

If it had been the landline I would have said don't be silly, it's just a neighbour - or a friend of the dad's. But the fact a woman answered your boyfriend's private mobile phone is a bit odd. If my DH's phone rings I just say 'hey your phone is ringing!' and take it to him, and he answers it. Someone else answering it is a bit weird. Doesn't mean an affair necessarily. Could just be a female friend of the family, or a female family member visiting, but answering someone else's private mobile phone is a bit odd.

I would be on my guard if I was you @PeaceOverChaos

To my mind the default is you don’t answer someone else’s mobile phone unless you’ve been given permission. Don’t take it upon yourself to answer other people’s phones whose permission you haven’t sought or been given. It’s invading personal space otherwise.

I’m sorry to disillusion you but people can and do answer other people’s phones. It is the norm in my household, and plenty of others judging by previous posts.

I’m sorry to disillusion you but judging by this thread it really isn’t the norm for a lot of people!

Mummy answering her DSs phone for example is just cringe!

Agree. In my world/family/social circle, if someone's mobile phone rings (and they're out of the room,) someone will shout the person who's phone is ringing, and take the phone to them. (Or said person will run in.)

People are not 'disillusioned' because they say most people they know don't answer other peoples private mobile phones. 🙄

Just because it's normal in your world @cinquanta that doesn't mean it's normal in other peoples worlds, or that they are 'disillusioned.' 🙄

You are 'disillusioned' to think this! 😆

Mumsnet is not normal. I bet you get affronted by people knocking on your door as well. That’s not normal in real life but on Mumsnet no one answers the door 🤷‍♀️

Who on earth in this day an age has their ringer on?

Unless DH is on a rare night out then if someone phones at 10pm I'm deliberately ignoring it. Anyone with need to contact me urgently would already be in the house and I have a voice mail so they can leave a message.

A phone call is a request to talk not a demand for my attention 24/7 that must be answered and its not your place to decide I must answer it. Most calls I get (especially at odd hours) are spam cold call.

10pm is a ridiculous time to be phoning most people.

I’m not disillusioned at all. Just as long as the lot of people for whom it isn’t the norm accept the fact that for another lot of people it is the norm.

Pot, kettle, black. Just because it’s normal to not answer other peoples phones in your life, doesn’t mean it’s normal in other peoples worlds.

Think we are all going to have to agree to disagree about what constitutes “normal” when answering the phone.

Goodness, no. I wouldn’t. Not my business. If it’s important they’ll leave a message and John can get back to them. Given 75% of calls to my phone are junk calls that get blocked, I would categorically ignore a ringing phone that isn’t my own.

With regard to the OP, if you didn’t call the wrong number, I don’t know what the explanation is. I think you’ll just have to ask him, although whether you’ll get a truthful answer is another matter.

Well that’s something you seem to struggle with, hence your post about people being “disillusioned” .

Just pointing that out to you!

But in real life I’ve never seen anyone I know answer someone else’s phone. As a family it’s just an unspoken instinctive thing not to answer someone else’s phone. A phone is like a handbag, purse, wallet, the contents are normally just for the owner. If a friend said they looked in my handbag as they needed a tissue I wouldn’t like it. Phones should only be answered if you’ve been told you can.

But what do you mean by it’s the norm for some people? answering someone else’s phone might be the norm for you but what if it isn’t for the person whose phone it is you’re answering?

Just because it's normal in your world that doesn't mean it's normal in other peoples worlds, or that they are 'disillusioned.' 🙄

I didn’t say it was. My later post clarifies that. However, if somebody comes on here and makes rash statements like “Nobody answers somebody else’s phone” when they quite clearly do, then there is a chance that they will be disillusioned.

Serial killer?

🫢

The amount of arguing about who would and who wouldn’t answer the phone is pathetic and embarrassing. Why does everyone have to fight so hard to be right and can’t accept we’re all different. Utterly bizarre behaviour

Is it a prank website and they have turned the tables on you?

Oddly enough, I know the preferences of the people in my own household quite well.

We answer each other’s phones. It’s the norm… in my household.

Which is what I actually said. You may have missed it.

Dunno. Probably something to do with respecting privacy and a concept of “if its important they’ll text or leave a VM”

I’ve seen people answering other peoples phones. It’s not a frequent occurance as most people are surgically attached to their phones, but it does happen. Usually a person that leaves their phone about is not the same kind of person as one who feels like their phone is a part of them. I quite often forget where I put my phone. I don’t care if someone else answers it. Answering a phone is not the same as going through someones phone. Going through someones phone would be like rummaging in their handbag.

That’s completely different. You can’t even compare it.

This is a very good suggestion. Ring someone else and see if the same woman answers!