What would you do in our position?

[Weightloss12]

Hi, we’re a family of 5. Me and my fiancee currently share a room with our almost 3 year old daughter, we bought a 3 bedroom terraced house in January, our son has the box room, and our autistic 5 year old daughter has her own room, we’re thinking ahead to how we could make it work bedroom wise, our loft isn’t an option, and splitting the rooms would mean splitting a window, and unsure if it would be safe fire regs wise. We can’t put our 3 year old in with our 5 year old because she isn’t safe to be left unsupervised. WWYD?

Hmm. Difficult. Have you already got approval for a permanent parting wall with door for between the playroom and kitchen/diner from a builder? Some houses don’t have the correct structure to do a permanent wall and that looks like one of the ones I lived in where they said it wasn’t possible.

It’s a nice little room/area with the WC but you’re right probably wouldn’t fit more than a double bed so probably best turned into a single room when the time is right. But that would probably mean having to get another back door installed elsewhere, especially if it was a long term solution for bedroom and you’d have to roll the bins out etc.

I can see that the living room isnt really feasible for a bedroom either as a long term solution - if anyone comes down for a drink or anything they’ll have to walk through living room to get there and back again.

im stumped 🤣

I'd just keep the 3yo in with you.

If it’s their “forever home” that’s not really a long term solution as the 3 year old gets older

Only if the estate would have been liable for IHT if the house was sold at full price. If it was the only asset, there would have been no IHT to pay even at £220k.

Out of curiosity what would happen if they hadn’t got the house valued and it never got put on the market to begin with by their family who sold it to them? What would be considered full price?

HMRC would still review. They also review Landlords who aren't charging full market rates. They are going after so many people, just not the big tax dodging corporations!

But they have been living in the house for longer, since before autistic DD was diagnosed. The house previously belonged to a family member so was bought this year at a large discount. Presumably the only way the family could afford to buy a property.

But if it’s been through probate and it’s been granted, what is there to review?

I wrote the original reply before OP said they’d been living in it for longer

I see. So even though presumably this house wasn’t listed at market value /listed at all as it was sold to family, OP could still get in trouble?

@Weightloss12 you could always start learning like fast and understand you're financial situation.
If you try hard enough you could sell it and remortgage. Move to a more suitable house.
Keep your eye on the ball.

What are you on about, I haven't sent you a PM (not DM on MN) you might have got an email notification from MN that someone had quoted you. But that's not a DM/PM.

Exactly, thankfully as you said 'water off a ducks back' but it could have really upset someone already feeling 'not good enough'/fragile.

Totally agree

@Weightloss12 if your main problem with this suggestion is not hearing the girls when they are in their rooms and you're in the living area, you could easily have a baby monitor kept on the landing so you would be able to hear them. Plenty of families use monitors or even Alexa to communicate between rooms.
fwiw I think your kitchen \diner\playroom is lovely at the moment and being open plan should make it versatile enough to work as the main living area

I would convert the playroom into a bedroom for you and your OH.

Sorry but I hate posts like this where the op just rubbish’s the only suggestions that exist. Short of someone giving you a bigger house for free, what were you hoping for?! They can’t share, you can’t move, the playroom is too far.. what did you want people to say?!

Reminds me of when occupational health came round to assess our house for a disability grant application. It was the maximum we could afford and the best available in the area. We needed step free access and this was the only one that was any way close and she said why didn't we buy something more suitable! Too gob smacked to say anything to her

I noticed this. It’s pointless suggesting anything, all the viable options have been shut down.

She maybe assumed you’d be ok with moving out of area which you obviously weren’t

@Weightloss12 @SummerFrog25 they just need to rearrange the ground floor. no one in a 1960's house even has a drawing room. move the wall and make that a bedroom. do away with the playroom and make it a large opem plan kitchen diner living room. she didnt say till way after her first post that she had lived there three years prior to purchase. she also didnt say that she had a play room and a "drawing" room as well as a lounge/ we all found that out after seeing her plan of the downstairs layout.

Why are you addressing your post like this when weightloss12 IS the OP?

people have been questioning the purchase in January looong after her post explaining that they'd already lived there before buying it. People complain if you add information later, they'll also complain if the OP is too long, you just can't win.

I've already said what my solution would be. Hopefully one suggestion by one poster will give her a solution that she's happy with.

its normal to say that xyz suggestion won't work for your situation, because its mostly things you've already considered & can't or don't want to do, & it's perfectly normal to hope someone will suggest something you've not thought of!!

if people get frustrated they can move onto another thread 🤷🏻‍♀️ there's no need to be rude & get arsey about it.

DS shared a room with us until he was nearly 5.

It didn't bother us and wasn't a problem.

I think beyond that it would be pushing it. The girls would have to share at that point.

The OP is going to have to move or find a solution that she doesn't want to consider at this point because she doesn't have a choice.

I think she said her daughter has autism and wouldn’t be able to/ wouldn’t cope with sharing